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AIBU?

In thinking I can lose 10 pounds by Saturday?!

61 replies

barnflakes · 22/06/2017 19:19

I've just been invited to a party on Saturday which is being covered by US Vogue. In the extreme unlikelyhood of me actually being in the background in a picture and because every single other person will be a foot taller, beautiful and skinny and it'll be my first proper night out since having ds 3 years ago and I'm a wobbly mess, is there any way you can quickly shed some flab, and any other instant tricks to look less shit?

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MsVestibule · 22/06/2017 19:22

I think 10lbs in less than 48 hours might be a bit tricky...

However, do you have an outfit to wear that you feel good in, even if not model like? Do you have time to book a hair appointment/manicure/spray tan/professional makeup appointment?

bigredboat · 22/06/2017 19:24

One of those wrap things will temporarily streamline you, plus Spanx and a flattering outfit and make up you should be good to go.

crazykitten20 · 22/06/2017 19:26

Breathe in - constantly 😉😉

AnnaNimmity · 22/06/2017 19:27

well you could probably lose 3lb if you didn't eat anything between now and Saturday (prob not advised).

you could appear to lose another few by wearing spanx or similar

Wear high heels - they make your legs look slimmer ime

then a fantastic dress and hair/make up/accessories.

Failing that, just go as you are, love yourself and if you are me drink too much and have a fantastic time!

Tinseleverywhere · 22/06/2017 19:27

Go for the control underwear and nice outfit that suits you, hair and make up as a pp said.
Drink lots of water and reduce your carbs right down it can help get rid of retained water that would bloat you or make you puffy.

ALemonyPea · 22/06/2017 19:28

You need a wetsuit to match your skin tone, it'll be like a body sized Spanx

Piratesandpants · 22/06/2017 19:28

Spanx or M&S equivalent - smooths everything out and gives a better silhouette. Heels make legs look longer and lift bum. Have fun

MrsD79 · 22/06/2017 19:31

Don't be silly you will make yourself ill! You will be gorgeous just the way you are. Remember that!

onemorecupofcoffeefortheroad · 22/06/2017 19:33

Someone once told me a good tan makes you look half a stone less than you actually are.

If you don't have time for sunbathing you could fake it til you make it!

GirlOnATrainToShite · 22/06/2017 19:47

Waist Cincher? Fucking agony but looks great.

bimbobaggins · 22/06/2017 19:55

Good luck! I'm trying to loose 6 stone in 5 weeks but it's not working

Tinseleverywhere · 22/06/2017 19:57

I remember on the morning of a big family gathering texting my mum ' can I lose 2 stone by 11am?'

Bunnyfuller · 22/06/2017 19:58

bimbo be realistic - 4 stone in 5 weeks is achievable, 5 is just silly!

Mummyoflittledragon · 22/06/2017 20:01

Lots of vegetables and no added carbs. No sauces, alcohol etc. Won't be as much as you want but better than nothing.

kmc1111 · 22/06/2017 20:03

Loads of water, no salt or booze or carbonated beverages, Spanx, fake tan, blow dry.

RitaMills · 22/06/2017 20:03

Spanx, suck the belly in and no carbs from now until after the party might make you appear half way there.

Tinseleverywhere · 22/06/2017 20:05

Look up how to pose in photos. You can make yourself look a lot better by how you stand and things.

carjacker1985 · 22/06/2017 20:08

No salt, carbs, alcohol until then- eat salads (no dressing) with protein like plain lean chicken breast or boiled egg. Low dairy, low sugar. Grapefruit is an aquired taste but is good for speeding up weight loss. On the night- Spanx, stand up tall, wear heels and your most confident outfit. The second you eat a canapé or drink a glass of bubbles you may well burst out of your Spanx though!

bimbobaggins · 22/06/2017 20:34

Thanks bunny, that's probably a better idea

specialsubject · 22/06/2017 20:36

Ah, the old grapefruit bollox again.....

Make sure you charge vogue for using your photo, and enjoy.

KrayKray00 · 22/06/2017 20:48

Get some diet tea from Holland and Barrett. It will clean you out. Bare in mind it will be water weight and not heathy to do constantly. Make sure you're by a toilet too and beware of the stomach cramps

TaraCarter · 22/06/2017 20:57

bimbobaggins and Bunnyfuller, you're both bonkers.

Safe, achievable weight loss is between 1 and 2 pounds a week. You cannot lose a stone or nearly a stone every week.

barnflakes · 22/06/2017 21:02

Can't get to any appointments or shops before then. I live in the arse end of nowhere and it's too late to get any delivered as we don't get Saturday deliveries.

I'm aware of the tan so burnt the shit out of myself today. Now I'll probably have peeling to add to my sex appeal.

All of my clothes are a bit out dated too. Ok for here but not for some swanky fashion party.

Will go with the getting drunk so I don't care option. And no carbs.

OP posts:

barnflakes · 22/06/2017 21:03

They'll all be clamouring to stand next to me so I slim and tall them up.

I've already decided I hate everyone. Nothing like a good positive attitude.

OP posts:

SomeOtherFuckers · 22/06/2017 21:07

Lemon juice and cayenne pepper can apparently lose 10lb in a week?

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