AIBU to think 37 isn't too old for a 3rd DC?

[GingerHair02]

Hiya

My first child was born when I was 29. I have always wanted a 4 year age gap, so the DC would be at school. I am 33 and have just had my second 2 months ago. We were lucky we got the age gap we wanted and I do know that.

I plan on another 4 years for the 3rd but if it doesn't happen, that okay and I'd rather have the 2 we have than another DC less than 4 years from now.

DH is claiming I'll be too old at 37!! and we should start trying "soon"! Our second is only 2 months!

AIBU to think 37 isn't too old?

3rd at 37.
10 years after my first.
5- ish years between my kids!
Conceived after one go, same as the others!

My mum had me at 37 and my sister at 42 in the early 80s. She was considered so unusual that she was asked to go to a lecture for med students at the university as a rare example of a healthy, elderly primigravida with an uncomplicated pregnancy

I do think there's a big difference between 37 & say 41 or 42. I know there seems to be an awful lot of women on MN who've had dc easily well into their 40's, but in reality it isn't that easy.

My mum was 41.

I had my 1st at 37!

Then dd2 a year later, and ds at 41.

hazey
I never knew you were that age! You look younger

It's not too old, but planning to wait until then is ridiculous.

@bridgetreilly eh, why???

Maybe DH wants to get the kiddies stage out of the way? as older kids are more manageable? Spacing them out with 4 years each does mean the kiddy stages stretches over 12 years? It's a conversation between you and DH, and what you both want for your family life and future

I'm 39 just had my third

I think what bridgetreilly means 37 is not necessarily too old if you say didn't meet your partner until late, took awhile too conceive, or various circumstances or even had an unplanned pregnancy but ideally she wouldn't deliberately opt for 37 if you wanted a baby and could try for a baby sooner.

@user1494935220 no, we both agreed on the 4 year age gap, he likes that age gap because it really suits our family and said that if we had met earlier he would have liked even more with that age gap!! We didn't meet particularly late at all though! We met at 23 but both wanted to enjoy life first. He genuinely thinks I'm too old!!

I don't think it's a good idea to wait to have babies.

I'm 37 and DH wants to consider a 4th. First 3 were born when I was 31, 32 and 35. I'm looking at the back end and asking, 'Do I want to be 59 with a 22 graduate?' I'm asking this because the expectation is that we fund our kids for what seems to be forever. With Dd2 I will be 57 when she graduates and I will have 8 years until I am 65 and will work until I am about 67. With a fourth I will have to work until I am 70 and I'd rather not do that!

We waited and had a big age gap on purpose because I needed to have a fairly independent older child before I had another baby (I'm disabled and that brings certain challenges with it) and we also had to pick a time when my health was stable enough to cope with pregnancy.
What works for one family won't necessarily work for another but having one at 29 and another at 37 has been a positive experience for us and so far for the kids too.