AIBU to think 37 isn't too old for a 3rd DC?

[GingerHair02]

Hiya

My first child was born when I was 29. I have always wanted a 4 year age gap, so the DC would be at school. I am 33 and have just had my second 2 months ago. We were lucky we got the age gap we wanted and I do know that.

I plan on another 4 years for the 3rd but if it doesn't happen, that okay and I'd rather have the 2 we have than another DC less than 4 years from now.

DH is claiming I'll be too old at 37!! and we should start trying "soon"! Our second is only 2 months!

AIBU to think 37 isn't too old?

I hope not, I'm currently 36 and TTC no 3 (would be at least 37 by the time it is born).

DC1 I was 30 (just - by 2 weeks), DC2 I was 33 (just - by a day), I had 2 MC last year aged 35 and now at 36 we are trying again. I'm not sure whether we will manage though, getting and staying preg feels more difficult now.

I am 36 and 22 wks with a surprise #3. While I am plumper than I was 10 years ago I don't feel any older, 36/37 isn't 'old'!

Ripple there is plenty of information and I was right up in the triple red and yellow stickers for risk when I was pregnant at 36.
I was under St Marys (top high risk and complications clinic) for RMC.
The midwives were very clear that risks at 36-37 were not "enormous" and were often exaggerated on forums they said rolling their eyes by the public and some HCP unused to older mothers.
My age was the least of their worries - and the risk would have been much lower if I wasn't a first baby.

That's really key.

Risk is lower for older second time mums than older first time mums.

And even then 35-38 is not seen as a massive risk.

In Victorian times healthy and we'll fed mums started at 18 or so but kept going to their late 30s, it is the age of first time mums that has risen - and the dip in the 60s-90s was due to the pill (start younger, but this time you can STOP AT TWO age under 30). It's a newish thing.

OP - go for it. You'd be the average age for a 2nd in North West London (he nhs bit not the posh bit before anyone thinks that's with fancy private care) cause none of us can afford it till 30+.

I won't risk another but that's not my age it's my thyroid/joints/APS/MH ... which was ironically worse in my 20s!

Well for me it would be. I have five children, first born two days before my 18th. I do not want to go back to the early years days and more school runs. My youngest is 8 and my oldest is 18 so I couldn't imagine anything worse.

I have no opinion on what other people our ages do. If you want one at 37 then have one. I don't think you would be too old at all. I just knew that when I hit my mid 30s I wanted to concentrate on my career and have more freedom, but I didn't have much chance to do that in my 20's.

No its absolutely fine, I know women who have had babies in their late 30s and 40s.

Not too old at all! I'm 37 and pregnant with number 2. I guess you just need to be prepared that there are more risks the older you get, including the risk that it could be harder for you to conceive. But lots of people have babies at that age or older.

Flippin could that also be because you had 3. Kudos to you! Even if I could I wouldn't have the steam, I think!

I had my youngest when I was 38. At ante natal classes I was amazed to discover I was the youngest but one.

Not at all. DW was 38 when our last one was born - no probs whatsoever.

I had my third at 40. My pregnancy was much harder than the others, but I coped.

I was 39 having my (unplanned) third.

By far the easiest birth of the three and far less complications during the pregnancy than I had with my first at 29.

Definitely not too old!

I had my first aged 35

Pregnant with my 2nd aged 37 last year- however that ended in MMC at the dating scan

Have spent almost the entire time aged 38 TTC again

I'll be 39 before (any) baby makes an appearance

The point is, if you want a 3rd don't leave it too late, but obviously right now is a bit too soon!

I know women have babies into their late 30s/early 40s but given my recent experiences, I wish we'd just cracked on with it when LO had turned 1/was coming up to 18 months

It's fine, I had my 7th at 37.

@bonzo77 but honestly, if I fell pregnant earlier I'd honestly be unhappy, I love the 4 year gap and would rather not have a 3rd if I had them before 4 years. Not to sound awful or anything, I just like having a focus on each child. I get to sit and just cuddle my baby all day while DS is at school or take her on walks to grab breakfast or swimming lessons and when DS is home she kind of becomes less centre of attention while I take DS to park, etc. and I suppose I've always been the same!

I adopted my DC3 when I was almost 36.
You have to jump through a LOT of hoops to adopt. If 37 was too old I wouldn't have DC3 or 4 or 5

I dare you to start this thread on Netmums though.

I'm having my third at 42 😬😬

It would've been too old for me. I wanted to be done by 35, & as it happened I was 33 when I had my third & last child.

That was my choice, and I accept everyone is different. I don't see anything wrong with having children later, it just suited me not to.

I had ds1 at 36 and ds2 at 37.

I love my small age gap

Nah, not too late. Go for it.

And good luck!

I had my first at 35 and second at 38. Go for it!

I was 40 when I had my 3rd and last DC.

I found it a little harder but might be due to having 2 others to look after (3 if you count DH!)

Not old at all. I had ds 2 months before my 37th birthday. Perfectly normal pregnancy & birth.

I had my first at 37. No probs, except hyperemisis, which is not associated with age.

I had my 3rd at 37.

She keeps me young....

I was 39 when I had my 3rd - the other 2 were convinced we did it solely to embarrass them