AIBU to think 37 isn't too old for a 3rd DC?

[GingerHair02]

Hiya

My first child was born when I was 29. I have always wanted a 4 year age gap, so the DC would be at school. I am 33 and have just had my second 2 months ago. We were lucky we got the age gap we wanted and I do know that.

I plan on another 4 years for the 3rd but if it doesn't happen, that okay and I'd rather have the 2 we have than another DC less than 4 years from now.

DH is claiming I'll be too old at 37!! and we should start trying "soon"! Our second is only 2 months!

AIBU to think 37 isn't too old?

I'm 37 and my 3rd is due in September, with a 4 year age gap. We planned it this way so the older 2 would be at school and we're lucky we conceived on the first month of trying.

I have a 2.5 year age gap between DC1&2 and would not contemplate doing that again! It was hard enough at 33 to look after a baby and an energetic toddler.

I've actually found this pregnancy easier than number 2 so far, but have been slightly more tired. I would definitely say 37 is not too old, especially with a 4+ yr age gap.

2nd at 38, no problems, got pg 2nd month and had no issues during the pg or after. She's 11 now.

I was 34 when I had my first, due to fertility issues, then had DC2 at 36, DC3 at 38 and DC4 at 40. The getting up in the night definitely got harder the more I had.
Now I find myself unintentionally single and life is bloody hard and relentless and a financial nightmare

But no, 37 is not too old for a baby

I had my 3rd at 37 :)

The pregnancy was a bit harder because i threw up every day for months but once that went away I was ok.

Definitely not too old. I know plenty of mum's who had children in their late 30s and early 40s. I had ds at 30 and currently 23 weeks with ds2 and I'll be just 34 when he arrives. We are stopping at 2 bit more for financial reasons than anything else.

I'm 37 and 10 weeks pregnant with number 2. Midwife said I'm 'super low-risk'

You might feel different when your DC2 is older.
FWIW, 37 is def not too old for a DC3; I was 40 when I had DS,
However, i would agree < whispers > 3 years off 50, running round after an energetic 6.5 year old is tiring.

I had my first at 31 and my fourth (very much a surprise) at 41. Pregnancy and birth were easy - much easier than the first - and I felt fine. I think my body got in a rhythm of producing a child every three years

I seem to be less tired with my two youngest than I was with my two eldest.
Twenty five years on. I remember sitting in playgroup and falling asleep back then.

Dunno why.

I was a first baby to 39yo DM. The midwives said she was in the best shape post partum of everyone in the ward and I was a small but healthy baby.

DS1 29, DS2 33, DS3 37 all planned, gaps worked out fine for us.

Gah I hope not! I'm planning dc3 now at 37, will probably be 38/39 (if im lucky) by the time I fall pregnant

I wouldn't have intentionally hadn't my last dc this late, mid thirties would have been ideal. But 37-40 is not too late, esp for a third child

My mum had her 3rd at 39, 2 months before her 40th birthday. This was in 1982, and she managed fine!

I was 38 when I had my first!

Not at all - 1st 33, 2nd 36 and 3 37 and all fine and so am I. Knackered but fine!

Huh? I'm 38 and pregnant with my first. Only one of my friends my age is a mum already. I don't feel too old at all - if anything I feel too young in my friendship group!

I had my first at 38 and second and 39. I wouldn't change them for the world but it is bloody hard work the older you get. Also take into account any family members will be older so if they provide any help or support now they may not be able to do this if you want to wait four years. My niece is nearly two years older than my DS. My mum practically brought her up (but by time my DS was born she could hardly be bothered to see him, visit or come shopping never mind help in anyway like occasional babysitting. Also your fertility declines sharply from age 35. I didn't meet DH until 33 and got married at 35 and it took us a goodly while to conceive in an ideal world I wouldn't chose to have a baby past 35 mainly because it's so shattering. Being mum, DH (as he works and travels such long days), both sets of grandparents, aunties and uncles as they rarely see anyone. Also being morbid I also worry about DC's mental health if myself or DH die before say they leave school and if they would be mature enough to handle it etc. Also would BIL or my sister want to cope bringing two kids into their families if anything happened to us both.

Split the difference try after a year. My DC's were very close so once second got to 16 months it was easy until mid way through primary school. Now at secondary school they seem to hate each other. So very difficult.

@Brighteyes27 definitely won't be trying after a year. After all, I'm the one who is part time and will be doing most of the childcare so no way! I really don't want an 18 month old and newborn.

Thanks everyone

I hope not! Just had my first at 36 and I went two more!

5th at 40. Can't say I felt any different to the others either in pregnancy or in looking after baby/toddler at such an advanced age!

Just had my first at 39... (years of miscarriages so later than planned). Hope to have my second at 40/41.

Must say I'm knackered from it all though!

I had my children at 34 and 36. Maybe it was having two children over one, but I found that my energy levels never really kept pace in the same way after child number two.

I'm 40 now, and much as it'd be nice to have a third, I am too tired!

I had my 3rd at 38. It was fine.

From what I've read you'd rather have 2 but not a 3rd that doesn't fit your time plan. I don't think your question fits the title. Women can conceive until they're 40+ but for one of you it's now or maybe never whilst for you it's in 4 years or maybe never. If you're adamant that you won't have another until you feel ready then how old is too old becomes irrelevant really.

I don't think your age is a huge issue but the age gaps between the children might be. I have a friend with a 2 year old and a 10 year old, so the same age gap as your oldest and youngest would be if your plan works. They are in completely different stages of life and it is a challenge for her to juggle a 10 year old on the verge of preteen/adolescence and a toddler having terrible twos.