Should it be illegal for 1st cousins to marry?

[brasty]

My DP's parents are 1st cousins, and DP has a genetic illness. Marrying your 1st cousin increases the chances of genetic illness. So I wonder if we should simply make it illegal for 1st cousins to marry? Obviously anyone married would stay so, it would only apply to new marriages.
AIBU?

I've only skimmed TFT so apologies if this point has already been made. But the flip side to these sorts of arguments: Research for BBC2's Newsnight in November 2005 showed British Pakistanis accounted for 3.4% of all births but have 30% of all British children with "recessive disorders"
Rates of serious genetic defects and infant mortality are far higher in areas of the country where this is common (e.g. In the Pakistani community in Bradford)
is that Pakistani and Irish Traveller culture is also far less amenable to terminating a pregnancy due to congenital disorders. If we really want to know whether procreation with 1st cousins causes these problems, we need to look at the rates in utero, not at birth.

Nah, that's gross.

Doesn't matter how you try to dress it up that is a close relation.

It's made me go all creepy-skinned

She is upset because she never before realised that many people think our marriage is sick but have just never said it to her face over the years.

Don't do it then, cake

That you've come on to tell everyone the big bad thread made your wife cry, not offer an opinion.

Your opinion is obviously that he's fine. Plenty of people have the opinion that it's not.

Nobody is crying about it, or feeling the need to point out that they're crying about it.

This happens in Jewish communities as well. There are a disproportionate number of children born with severe and debilitating diseases. It's not common practice in these communities to marry that closely but there are still issues from previous generations.

Anyway, I don't think it should be illegal and I don't find it sick or disgusting. The posters who are continuing to make these statements aren't showing themselves in a great light.

I worry that we are going down a slippery slope also. Cousins? Don't have babies, high genetic risk. Older women? Yep, same for you. Couple who both have learning disabilities? No babies for you!

Yeah, I'm not into incest, I wouldn't.

To be fair, as I said way upthread and I'm sure I'm not alone, if you have a close relationship with your cousin, you are going to feel a bit sick about it, aren't you?

It's human nature.

In terms of procreation of course it should be illegal.

As an advanced nation we clearly look after those who are born with disabilities, and I see these married cousins have a higher chance of having a child with such.

What on earth do poorer nations - whose cultures encourage these cousin arrangements - do to look after all of the offspring with disabilities? Or do they do what I don't even want to mention?!

I did know one man actually, who married a woman and had 2 kids with her (girls,) then left her for her sister who was 18 years younger than her (when the sister was only 18 and he and his wife were in their mid 30's,) He had 2 boys with the younger sister. So the 2 girls and 2 boys were half siblings and cousins.

And then about 10 years later, the younger sister left HIM for his younger brother. And had a boy and a girl with him. So the father of the half siblings of the boy and girl (that the younger sister had with the original man's brother,) was their uncle! (I think!!!)

I think people got confused as to what relationship the boy and girl were to other other 4 kids. People gave up trying to figure it our LOL!

THAT was weird.

But yeah, first cousins marrying should be outlawed imo. Like I said on the previous page, it's no better than uncle and niece, or aunt and nephew.

Interesting to read about how the issue is really about successive cousin marriages. My DPs family live in a very isolated part of UK, and DP and I joke that he is related to virtually everyone there who is over 40 years of age.
No joke, FIL introduces me to various people saying, this is DPs third cousin, or variations on this. But in DPs generation, virtually everyone marries from outside, so any issues will disappear.
The rest of DPs siblings are fine, just him who has inherited a very rare genetic disease.

But I think IABU, and what is needed is more education. Very sad to hear about couples having severely disabled children, and being unaware that marrying their cousin could cause this.

Of purse some people are going to feel ill thinking about it.

If you've grown up with your cousins, spent family holidays together etc. you'd never go there.

They are your family, your blood. I can't believe people are sneering at anyone who thinks that is wrong as hell.

As mentioned earlier I know a lot of people in DH's family who have had children with cousins, first and more distant. It's an old aristocratic tradition of keeping money and land in a small group of people, in northern Europe.

Those cousins who have problems as a result are the children of couples who are not only cousins, but themselves the children of cousins and so on, sometimes for many generations. Even then, some are fine, others have issues.

Apparently periodically someone in the family decides that they need to expand the gene pool a bit and they marry outside.

Well yes Walter hence why I said to cake "don't do it."

But shouting "ew ew ew" over someone you don't even know marrying someone else you don't even know is odd!

But if you haven't grown up with your cousins, you won't.

You do know not all families are the same!

Not really, there is a reason that most people feel a natural revulsion to even the idea of incest.

Yes, immaturity, based on the squealing on this thread.

TBH I don't see cousins as a close relation. There must be many people like me who don't know their cousins? I could meet mine tomorrow and not even know they were my cousin!

Plenty of people choose to have children knowing they have increased risk of genetic conditions.

I haven't shouted "ew ew ew"!!

I read that children brought up in children's dormitories in a Kibbutz together, were repulsed at the idea of having a sexual relationship with those they were brought up with. They saw it like having a sexual relationship with a brother or sister, even though they had no biological tie. So it does seem to be a natural thing to stop very close family having children.

"I don't think we are doing anyone any favours by ignoring that consanguineous marriage is more common in some communities and severe genetic conditions are common in those same communities."

As said, it's the continuous marriage between cousins going down generations which is the problem. If this is happening within certain communities, It's absolutely* ridiculous to think discussion on this subject is racist, it's science*. As the Asian peer in the article says "It is a social practice which does not belong in today’s age, when we know so much about DNA."

www.telegraph.co.uk/news/health/children/11723308/First-cousin-marriages-in-Pakistani-communities-leading-to-appalling-disabilities-among-children.html

It is science, but some racists will criticise it from a racist position.

That that is reality, though. I'm surprised your wife wasn't already aware of that. There is generally an aversion to marriage between first cousins in British culture.
I would advise your wife never to watch an American chat show. They tend to be very outspoken in their opinions on marriage between cousins, and not just first cousins. It's viewed very negatively.

brasty I think that explains the strong reactions most people get to this subject.

I grew up knowing my cousins, so the idea of marrying one of them is as repulsive to me as the idea of marrying my brother.

It isn't to me, because I hardly know my cousins - big family fall out when I was a toddler.