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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think the Ariana concert is being held *way* too soon?

183 replies

PenPineapplePen · 01/06/2017 21:18

I think it's a fabulous idea to have this memorial concert. But...

Some of the dead have not even been buried yet. Those still in hospital are unable to attend. Families directly affected by the bomb will have much more to attend to right now than going to the concert.

I think it would have been a lovely idea to do in say the autumn - where people will have started to piece their lives back together a tiny bit.

OP posts:
user1482079332 · 01/06/2017 23:07

I think if you've leave it to long it may become harder, whereas going back there is facing it sooner before it becomes a thing.

TheweewitchRoz · 01/06/2017 23:08

I don't think it is too soon. FWIW, Ariana / her team might not realise the dead aren't buried yet as in the US, they would have been buried already.

PickAChew · 01/06/2017 23:13

I thikn that it's great that it's so soon. Families in need of financial help need it sooner rather than later and, apart from that, it's a Disney sanitised fuck you to the perpetrators.

2rebecca · 01/06/2017 23:13

Fundraiser for what? It was mainly kids who were killed their deaths will be devastating for their families but I hate the way people think money is a cure all. They won't have dependants fundraising is really tasteless. If my kids died at a pop concert I can't see any way I'd think another op concert would improve the situation

neveradullmoment99 · 01/06/2017 23:13

Its just over a week ago. It really is a bit much. I read today that the mum of the beautiful little girl that died just found out she was dead. Sad

neveradullmoment99 · 01/06/2017 23:15

I agree, I cant imagine how having lots of money is a cure all. For the practical part of burying the dead, yes but after that no. It wont change anything and i cant see how money brings any comfort in this circumstance.

mrsrumplestiltskin · 01/06/2017 23:15

God it gets worse

I've reported this thread as I think it's disgusting and totally against the support we have seen by those in Manchester and actual people involved.

My sister was in Manchester when this happened, I couldn't get hold of her - can you imagine sat on your sofa in surburbia somewhere how that feels? And you feel it ok to question this concert?

Reported and hidden - vile.

TheweewitchRoz · 01/06/2017 23:18

Mrs you have no idea what the people on this thread have been through Confused

neveradullmoment99 · 01/06/2017 23:19

Everlybody feels for the people of Manchester and no disrespect is given. All people are saying is, is this the best way to offer help?

Shockers · 01/06/2017 23:21

Yep, I can. My friend's 18yr old daughter was there. She's still traumatised by what she witnessed and survived. It's very raw.

neveradullmoment99 · 01/06/2017 23:22

Shockers, how does your friends daughter feel about the concert?

tabulahrasa · 01/06/2017 23:22

"Fundraiser for what? It was mainly kids who were killed"

Funerals are expensive - a cremation with no service at all costs at least 1.5k, add another 2 if you want an actual basic funeral and more if you want anything better than the bare minimum.

Those parents are fairly unlikely to be back at work, and with money available won't have to rush back before they're ready.

No, money isn't going to make their loss any better, but it'll make managing the situation financially a hell of a lot easier.

PickAChew · 01/06/2017 23:23

2rebecca, the kids won't have dependants, but they have family who have to find funeral fees. Other victims may be incapacitated to a point that family members have to take long term carer's leave or even quit work to look after them. Or adult victims (because there were plenty - just not as heavily publicised in the press because it doesn't make as good a story) end up on long term sick leave or unable to work again. I expect that there will be some audience members who weren't severely physically injured who are so traumatised that they have a difficult recovery path of their own to navigate.

The devastation from an event like this goes far deeper than deaths and funerals.

user1491572121 · 01/06/2017 23:24

She acted immediately out of an urgent need to "right" the wrongs. How can this even be questioned??

neveradullmoment99 · 01/06/2017 23:25

..because its how the young people died.

PickAChew · 01/06/2017 23:26

So we should never have pop concerts (yes, I'm old) ever again, never?

TrinityTaylor · 01/06/2017 23:26

Neveradullmoment how about - private physio, private counselling, family holidays to cheer an injured/traumatized child up, things like equine therapy, sports therapy, sessions in swimming pools with specialised therapists, custom wheelchairs, buying a bungalow or adding low level adaptations to homes, plastic surgery for facial injuries, cars or vans with wheelchair accessibility, money to pay bills so a parent can quit work for a while to care for a child, private tutors so child can catch up with school work, play therapists coming to your home and working with your kids to help them come to terms with losing a parent or sibling, money to fund family businesses that might go under/suffer, special beds or hoists, custom made legs or arm prosthetics, sports coaching for getting a person who might find themselves with a prosthetic and want to get into that, money for parking, food and coffees when visiting a child or relative every day in hospital for months (from personal experience can run into hundreds), communication devices that might be needed, very expensive wheelchairs, the list goes on.
You only have to read the threads about PIP or DLA to see how terribly hard it is to access funding for any of this stuff

WorraLiberty · 01/06/2017 23:27

Tbh I don't think it's for anyone here to decide that it's too soon unless they were a victim, or someone they care for was a victim.

They seem to have consulted the victims/families and gone with the majority.

Anyone else's opinion means diddly squat.

neveradullmoment99 · 01/06/2017 23:28

I can see where you are coming from. Yes the money is needed but a concerts within two weeks still seems too soon.

WorraLiberty · 01/06/2017 23:30

Too soon for who?

neveradullmoment99 · 01/06/2017 23:31

So we should never have pop concerts (yes, I'm old) ever again, never?

Of course we should. I am only responding to the question. Is it too soon. My answer is yes IMO. Not that we should never have concerts.

neveradullmoment99 · 01/06/2017 23:31

Too soon for the bereaved?

McTufty · 01/06/2017 23:32

I hate how whenever someone tries to do something positive and nice, people have to snipe and tear them down for it.

The decision has been made, after consultation with the families - people should get behind it.

WorraLiberty · 01/06/2017 23:33

Also, has anyone seen the NHS waiting list for trauma counselling?

They'd be lucky to get anything within the year in some areas.

Private counselling is expensive and there will be 1000s who need it right now.

neveradullmoment99 · 01/06/2017 23:34

To clarify:

The OP said is the concert too soon?
I say it is - for the bereaved/victims etc.
It is my opinion of course.
and yes, i do think we should still have concerts.

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