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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think detatched house equates to better standard of living sort of !

95 replies

ginorwine · 01/06/2017 15:18

Hello
Have lived in terraced house that we love for many years - brought dc up here . Fab 4 storey terrace with views over the sea . Inside really lovely to us as well as garden . Trouble is , neigbour s allowed to walk accross garden to take bins out and bikes etc . Neigbour also build summer house/ music room within 3 foot of my little summer house were ilove to sit ( perfectly entitled to )
Feels like garden of 12 foot v narrow ( 100ft long tho ) and the rare but potential of , walking accross garden now intrusive ...when dc little all was busy anyway and it didn't matter. Now live in beautiful house lovely garden infab area but feel a poss need for private garden. Seen house that is detatched in less nice area - the oau off is detetched and I'm hoping to ask / establish are the benefits of detatched fantastic??lived here were you have lovely neighbours but were can hear thro walls and have walk across garden and wd really appriciate knowing what it is like to be detatched with privacy . Our area is fab and I have lots friends here - impromptu wine / coffee - lots to lose - lots to gain- wd really appriciate help with the balance sheet . ( the other area were detatched house is is less vibrant suburbia cf with cityand sea views ) thanks

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peachgreen · 01/06/2017 15:23

Why not put up a fence to create an "alleyway" for your neighbour to cross your garden at the back? If it's long and thin you'd not be losing much.

In my experience, location is more the most important thing, and if I lived close to friends and felt part of a community I'd not want to lose that, especially as my DCs got older.

MrsTerryPratchett · 01/06/2017 15:25

I wuoldn't swap for anything. Sea view and great area with lovely neighbours? Worth their weight in gold.

There`s an Arabic saying, choose your neighbour before your house and your companion before the road. Very wise.

Ecureuil · 01/06/2017 15:26

I prefer detached houses, but that's because I have two toddlers and a beagle and I prefer not to stress about them making noise!
If you love your house and are happy there then I wouldn't move just to be detached.

HarrietSchulenberg · 01/06/2017 15:29

Depends. Modern detached houses aren't worth it but older ones usually are.
Detached dwellers often don't realise that their thin-walled houses are less soundproof than they think. My 111 year old mid-terrace has more soundproofing than some of the new build detached houses nearby.

Ecureuil · 01/06/2017 15:30

Yeah, new builds are generally crap and are so crammed together that it's no different to living in a terrace anyway.

PeanutButterJellyTimeforTea · 01/06/2017 15:32

I moved to a detached house a few years ago, first time in my life I lived in one and I bloody LOVE it. No neighbour noise, no listening to their doors slamming or arguing, no music, nothing. No worrying that other people can hear us. A large garden totally private and not overlooked...I am so much happier here than I was in flats and terraced houses.

I'm still in a lovely area though.

YoureNotASausage · 01/06/2017 15:35

We've an old detached farmhouse and I love it! So peaceful, off a quiet road, nearest neighbour is a small field away. Lots of space to put up good screening.

Run4Fun · 01/06/2017 15:36

I always say to when it comes to property.. you usually either have to compromise on the location or on the house, vry rare topportunity getc both within a
reasonable budget. Ideally, we would like to have a nice detached house with a big garden and a distance from neighbours but near enough to local amenities and a good Internet connection.

Your house sounds lovely ginorwine. Good fences make good neighbours.

ginorwine · 01/06/2017 15:36

It's a 1930 s detatched not a new build btw

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Run4Fun · 01/06/2017 15:37

*very rare to get both

AnnieOH1 · 01/06/2017 15:41

We live in a 2012 built detached, and soundproofing is not an issue at all. We never could have afforded a detached property in our home city but moved to a local market town and got our forever home for the price of a two bed apartment in decent areas of where we came from. The garden is massive, we are not overlooked by anyone. I grew up in a semi which wasn't too bad and lived mid terrace for a while which was a nightmare. Could hear every step, every door and drawer. So glad that we, the kids especially, don't have to worry about upsetting anyone with noise. Xxx

ginorwine · 01/06/2017 15:42

Icant section off the bottom - a neigbour closed off access some years ago and put a garage in the place were you could get out ...the only solution ican think of is - as neigbour has to pass by my kitchen window is to put a fence up outside it so I won't see them pass but then I cdnt see my garden
I either see them and my garden or not see them by sectionit off but not see my garden from house ( like a communal feel yard then past fence wd be private )

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Elphame · 01/06/2017 15:43

Best part of being detached is not hearing other people living their lives!

ginorwine · 01/06/2017 15:43

Yes can't have both it will be fab area or det house ...the detatched house is 5 min from sea in eldery population area .

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ginorwine · 01/06/2017 15:45

The area is not horrid
Just conservative and not a lot go on
It's 6 min away to were I live on train tho

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papayasareyum · 01/06/2017 15:51

we have a detached house and after years of living in a semi where we could hear our neighbours having a wee, having sex, opening drawers, hoovering, talking loudly (nevermind shouting) I'd only live in a detached house now.

ginorwine · 01/06/2017 15:52

Elp think it wd be amazing not to gave to worry about hearing others and depend on them being quiet ...

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deliciousdevilwoman · 01/06/2017 15:52

Post divorce, I have moved from a detached house to a mid terrace and I hate it! Love the new area-hate the house. Paper thin walls, can hear neighbour shouting at kids (and vice versa I'm sure!)even some normal pitched conversations too and I don't like the shared access for bins etc. It's what i could afford and it's mine, but if I could I'd opt for a detached house in a heartbeat. I've been here a year now and whilst I am getting on with it it just does not feel the same

peachgreen · 01/06/2017 15:52

Can you split your garden in two so you can see half of it and then have a private area at the back? I totally get why you don't like it, but it seems like you'd be losing a lot for not that much gain.

ginorwine · 01/06/2017 15:53

Papa get the sex thing
!!!! I don't want hear it !

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Coloursthatweremyjoy · 01/06/2017 15:54

I used to have a house like this. Your neighbour has "foot and Barrow rights", it'll be on your deeds. I had a lovely neighbour, I had to go round and let her know that she should take her bins past our house to put them out instead of through hers! I never found it intrusive, it's just part of living in that sort of house.

When you came out of our back door there was a small yard with a low wall and a gate. Then about 3 foot later another small wall with a gate allowing access to the rest of the garden. This is how the previous occupants arranged it. I knocked down both walls making it all open and got used to the idea that the neighbour walked past.

We now live in a detached house. It's only better because it's a nicer area, with more greenery and parking. Also I now don't have to deal with my old neighbours, weirdly not the only one who had access across our property. The others who were rude, messy and annoying. I wasn't attached to Them!

AngelsWithSilverWings · 01/06/2017 15:55

Currently living in a 1930's semi and have fantastic neighbours. Walls are thick enough that we don't hear any noise and the design of the house is great because despite being a semi , only our hall , kitchen , bathroom and spare bedroom are joined with next door.

Previous home was a 1980's 4 bed detatched in a cul de sac of identical properties. The noise from the neighbours was dreadful! Never felt very private as the houses were all so close together and we had other houses overlooking the back and side of our garden.

The reason we chose our current semi is because we moved here primarily for the location ( walking distance to the sea) and detatched houses are few and far between in this area.

Redsrule · 01/06/2017 15:55

My nearest neighbour is 200m away and the house is a holiday let, great most of the time but on a stormy winter's night it can feel very isolated. Sometimes it is a comfort to hear others.

VickieCherry · 01/06/2017 15:56

Personally I would put up with almost anything for a sea view.

Coloursthatweremyjoy · 01/06/2017 15:57

I live in an elderly population area now! It's great, never see anyone, never hear anyone. Gardens are immaculate. I love it.