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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To use the disabled loo when I'm with my son?

999 replies

RestingBitch · 19/05/2017 17:06

My sons 9 months and obviously still in his pushchair. The majority of the time it's just me and him when I go into town/visit places. When I need the loo I get an attack of conscious, I normally use the disabled loo so I can bring him in with me.
Can't use a regular loo as I can't get him in the cubicle in his chair. Don't want to take him out of his pushchair and plonk him on the floor as the floors are manky and he will eat whatever is on the floor. He'll also probably try and crawl under the gap and interrupt someone else. Don't really like the idea of leaving him in his pushchair whilst I nip in the cubicle, so providing there isn't someone waiting for the disabled loos, AIBU to use them? I'm usually in and out and so far I've never encountered anyone waiting for one, or the impatient rattle of the door. If I am being unreasonable, short of pissing myself what's the options?

Not a troll, and don't work for any newspapers :).

OP posts:
DailyMailReadersAreThick · 19/05/2017 23:04

Telling someone they basically shouldnt be left to be responsible for their own baby because they use a disabled toliet, when a lot ive been in has had changing facilities in, is not over the top?!

What do changing facilities have to do with a mother needing a pee while her baby is with her?

DarthMaiden · 19/05/2017 23:04

Nice to know nothing changes around here....

Refers to my pp (2nd after the OP)....

umizoomi · 19/05/2017 23:04

Agree with Twellly. the toilets are accessible.

So you may have a disabled person who doesn't have a physical disability but who may need to go quickly (so they cannot queue)
2.
You may have someone in a wheelchair who needs the toilet for access. However, they can queue as they can hold on for the toilet
3.
The toilet maybe needed by someone who has Alzheimer's who needs to be accompanied. So they need the space but can queue as physically the can hold on
4.
There is someone in a wheelchair who cannot hold on.
5.
There is a person with a baby who needs a wee. She needs the space but can hold on.

If there is no one in front of them there is no problem with number 5.

Although arguably person 2 and 3 could wait too.

Essentially if you have a child in a pram your priority is low but if the loo is empty why not? Just on the off chance that someone with a hidden disability who needs to go that minute needs the loo but at that given moment people described in 2 or 3 could legitimately be in he loo, so you can't go.

Bonkers.

Just be kind to people. I would never use an accessible loo but jeez I don't begrudge a woman and a pram needing a wee

SynysterGates · 19/05/2017 23:04

i think OvO is bang on

OvO · 19/05/2017 23:05

Oh and you know fine well I'm not talking about changing a baby in the available facility.

chicken2015 · 19/05/2017 23:10

Someone going into a toliet to change a baby is taking roughly same time what about if a disabled person needs the toliet is that person changing the nappy in the wrong because they used facilities first

OvO · 19/05/2017 23:14

I'm finding your arguments foolish.

If the baby change is in the disabled loos of course a baby is fine to be changed in there. Best if that facility was separate but if not then OF FUCKING COURSE YOU USE IT.

Don't pee in the disabled loos if you don't have a disability.

OvO · 19/05/2017 23:18

No more, no more. I'm meant to be sewing not arguing with fools.

In my first post I said there was no point arguing but then I stayed to argue anyway. I'm the fool now.

Kpo58 · 19/05/2017 23:19

Unfortunately not all people with babies have a chaperone with them at all times to look after the baby if they need the loo. They also can't juggle one or two babies and a handbag into the micro cubicles that you find in most toilets nowadays with blocking the rest of the ladies with the pram whilst letting a long queue of people waiting for the loo grow whilst the disabled toilets stand empty for most of the day.

SynysterGates · 19/05/2017 23:20

'I normally use the disabled loo so I can bring him in with me."
that is what the OP said

it was nothing to do with changing her child. just comfort
so a disabled person would have to wait for her.
so read the OP please
she was bu, why the fuck should a disabled person end up waiting?? just cos she wants her child in the roon with her.
if parents want that CAMPAIGN FOR IT

Kpo58 · 19/05/2017 23:32

why the fuck should a disabled person end up waiting?? just cos she wants her child in the roon with her.

You mean keeping a baby out of sight to be stolen with all belongings is reasonable?

Who said that a disabled person would be kept waiting? Most reasonable people would quickly look round to see if anyone else is heading towards the disabled toilet. If not, they would whip in and out in 3-4 mins.

SynysterGates · 19/05/2017 23:35

oh sorry
my mistake, i live in the visible disability world. so assumed wheelchair= disabled.
ooh hang on a min......are all disabilities visible???

Rainbowdash88 · 19/05/2017 23:36

but never mind, don't wanna chance your pfb getting nicked, do you.

Hmm
kali110 · 19/05/2017 23:42

Cripes on a bike. I've used them when I have too many shopping bags for a single toilet nevermind with a baby who needs more space in a regular bathroom. I've never ever seen a disabled person waiting when I come out so will continue to do so.
Judgement call then and there I think.
Fucking hell it just gets worse Confused

kali110 · 19/05/2017 23:46

No OvO def has it right

Wannabe2017 · 19/05/2017 23:53

They are called accessible toilets not disabled only toilets, YANBU OP!

SynysterGates · 20/05/2017 00:06

did you read the OP
they said DISABLED TOILET
so ....let me take a wild guess\this was not an accessible toilet.....but a DISABLED one
or
WTF WAS THE REASON FOR THE OP STARING THE THREAD (gf much)

Wannabe2017 · 20/05/2017 00:12

They are called accessible toilets not disabled toilets... A lot of people refer to them as disabled toilets but in reality they are called accessible toilets.

Feel free to point out the clear difference between the two if you think they are two different things...

OvO · 20/05/2017 00:42

They're toilets that disabled people can access. Not toilets accessible for every tom dick and harry.

I wasn't going to come back but people need telling.

Wannabe2017 · 20/05/2017 00:46

It's not every Tom, Dick and Harry. It was a lady who needed extra space. Not someone who cba waiting a couple of minutes.

You said it yourself, toilets disabled people are able to access if they need them, NOT disabled ONLY.

OvO · 20/05/2017 00:52

Yeah, disabled only. The one toilet a disabled person can access. ONE.

Unless baby unit in there then changing baby only, not people unable to figure out an only moderately tricky task of weeing with a baby in tow.

Dawndonnaagain · 20/05/2017 00:54

Accessible toilets are accessible for those with disabilities. They are not accessible for your fucking convenience. Sod the pun.
If you're rude or entitled enough to think you need them when you don't, go ahead, you will anyway. But know this. I didn't start shitting myself until a couple of years ago. It's still uncontrolled, although I got new medication this week, so let's hope. It might be you one day, posting on threads like these saying if you don't need them please don't use them. It's embarrassing, humiliating and all sorts of other things shitting yourself in public, but it's even worse when it's absolutely unnecessary.

Wannabe2017 · 20/05/2017 00:57

They're not disabled only though are they? It's your opinion that they should be, but in reality they're not.

OvO · 20/05/2017 01:02

In reality they're not because people are selfish. They're thoughtless. Some seem to be bordering on incompetent.

They are NOT for people with a pram, a buggy, a suitcase, a trolley, or anything else unless they ALSO have a disability.

Dawndonnaagain · 20/05/2017 01:04

No, it's not my opinion. They were originally designed specifically for those with disabilities. There primary purpose (other than when combined) is for use by people with disabilities. Doesn't matter what you'd like to think or how many ways you choose to interpret accessible, when they're being discussed on council committees all over the country, they're being discussed as loos for use by people with disabilities. Funnily enough, when I was campaigning for them, when I was on the various councils, when my family where on local councils, not one of us heard anyone discussing were they big enough for a woman too scared to use the other loos because someone might pinch her baby even though nobody has ever had their baby stolen from a public lavatory.