Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To punish for low grade at school? (Year 3)

101 replies

jumildreen · 18/05/2017 17:05

Just wondering if it would be okay. DS didn't do well in his spellings at all we have been working hard on them at home but I feel he isn't trying hard enough with them at school.

WIBU to punish because of this?

OP posts:
RoseandVioletCreams · 18/05/2017 17:08

No you need to help him get motivated to learn more and well.

Just go over a few with him, what does he like? what would be a good reward goal for him to look forward too?

PedantHere · 18/05/2017 17:09

YABU

You need to set rewards if he achieves a certain target. You should also try different (more interesting) revision strategies instead of just learning by rote.

DarkFloodRises · 18/05/2017 17:10

YABU. He may find spelling hard (any indicators that he is dyslexic?). Or even if he was messing around and could have done better, it's only a Y3 spelling test, not his GCSEs! I think you need to chill out a bit.

bigmack · 18/05/2017 17:10

You think he's not learning on purpose? What a strange idea.

alltouchedout · 18/05/2017 17:11

Yes, of course YABU Hmm

Dawndonnaagain · 18/05/2017 17:11

Please don't ever penalise a child for not doing well. He may have had a bad week, someone else may have upset him at break. He's year three, that's tiny. Just find a different and more fun way of helping him to remember them. Play games rather than learning by rote.
Good luck!

FurbysMakeSexNoises · 18/05/2017 17:11

I've never ever responded on these but YABVU

AnnetteCurtains · 18/05/2017 17:12

Why do you think he's not trying hard enough ?

RubyWinterstorm · 18/05/2017 17:12
Sad

don't punish! Do you want to create anxiety in him about spelling? Anxiety and stress do not generate better academic outcomes or happy children.

Try reading with him instead, reading is a great way to improve spelling

jumildreen · 18/05/2017 17:12

I was only planning on removing his chill time and change it for extra revision!

OP posts:
SweetLuck · 18/05/2017 17:13

Christ, way to inspire a child to love learning!

SweetLuck · 18/05/2017 17:14

'Chill time'?

That just called 'being at home' here Grin

christinarossetti · 18/05/2017 17:17

How's his spelling overall, because that's what matters?

I pretty sure that I've read somewhere that spelling tests don't improve spelling - using phonics for reading and writing does though.

pointythings · 18/05/2017 17:17

YABVU. If you want your DS to be good at spelling, read to him lots, encourage him to read for himself and make leaning spelling fun.

Lunde · 18/05/2017 17:17

Don't overreact and don't be silly - he is tiny and may not always "perform" in a test situation. This is a very small issue - by turning revision and learning into a punishment you might turn him off education altogether.

Reading threads like this makes me glad that my kids went to school in a country where formal education does not start until 7.

TheMysteriousJackelope · 18/05/2017 17:17

YABU.

It would be more to the point to work with him on the poorly spelled words over the weekend so he does know how to spell them in the future. That might help you find out why he did badly this week as opposed to other weeks so he can learn how to study more effectively.

Just punishing him won't help if he doesn't know how to learn material. It might be that the words are getting more difficult and his previous methods might not be working any more.

Tomorrowillbeachicken · 18/05/2017 17:17

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

jumildreen · 18/05/2017 17:18

He's actually 7.

OP posts:
LilQueenie · 18/05/2017 17:18

yabu if he isn't trying hard at school speak to the teachers. It is ok to have low grades especially at this age. He will learn at his own pace.

jumildreen · 18/05/2017 17:19

Well he is normally top for spelling and he wasn't last week. He didn't do good. 6/10.

OP posts:
CecilyP · 18/05/2017 17:21

If he did badly despite both of you working hard on his spellings at home, he has obviously forgotten them between the 'hard work' and the test. Perhaps the 'hard work' wasn't particularly effective, or perhaps his memory isn't that great. Do you honestly think he forgot them deliberately and punishment will inspire a better memory? YABVU!

dddddddddd · 18/05/2017 17:22

This can't be real Hmm

Whereisthecake · 18/05/2017 17:22

6/10 isn't even that bad?

YABU

jarhead123 · 18/05/2017 17:23

It's just spelling. He is 7! He'll get there.

Maudlinmaud · 18/05/2017 17:23

My father used to bang the table at me when he was "helping" me with my homework at that age. Please don't punish him. Try to make learning fun and interesting.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.