A lot of people view the opinions on these threads as the words of DM bigots, under informed and inaccurate and thus they label us bigots. The thinking is that since we're critical of a group of people, it's the same ad blind hatred/racism/homophobia - any criticism is being read as hate but if they actually took the time to read what is being said they'd realise we are in fact very informed, likely very leftist minded and many of us came through the same thought processes as them before we thought a bit more critically.
As for "non-binary", i think there's a lot of navel gazing involved in the shaping of these gender identities, combined with identity politics morphing being a sapiosexual pangender into the new emo, goth, punk, beatnik, mod. It is still very much centred around finding a place in the world through fashion, iconography and cliques but in a way that in the end has been harmful to young lesbians who are bullied for being lesbians rather than transitioning out of womanhood.
There's another side to this amongst my SJ minded same age (early-mid 20s) peers. In my circle of feminists, a lot of the women have now begun to id as non-binary. And you would read them all in the street as women - from butch women who date women, have short hair, use they/them, eschew make up and dresses, to women who love hair and beauty, dresses, use she/her date men and generally conform to society's expectations of womanhood. So you might be wondering what about the latter group is non-binary.
I have said on a number of threads what it boils down to. We have women who will tell you the definition of woman is "anyone who identifies with womanhood, and has that nebulous feeling of being a woman". The point is that is so unlikely to resonate with anyone other than men who go on to transition. Most women, adult human females do not have any sense of womanhood beyond their biology but there are women who know to express this belief would make them a terf, so they look inwards, see they do not feel like a woman and therefore conclude they aren't one.
And there's a whole aspect of personality being conflated with gender, rather than being an assertive woman who takes up all the space she wants and goes about the world in ways men have felt free and entitled to do, they assume they must be men.
There's a lot to unpick, and I do think it makes going about the world that much more complex for young women. I think rather than doing what they rhink they are doing which is smashing the patriarchy head on, they're submitting to it under a different form. That's my issue.