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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to feel very uncomfortable with neighbour's drone filming habits?

133 replies

WelliesAndPyjamas · 16/05/2017 07:45

We have relatively new neighbours - moved in to rental house next door less than a year ago, husband and wife, about 50 yrs old, work long hours, he works shifts, quiet and friendly enough. All fine and we were relieved that they turned out to be nice because let's face it, it is always a gamble with new neighbours (we lived next to a nasty one many years ago and the experience was horrid and unforgettable).

The new neighbour (the man) is a hobby wildlife photographer and has a Facebook page, which he invited me to follow, and I do because he is nice and his photos are lovely. He has recently bought a drone that can film in very high quality and travel very long distances. He put his first bit of footage on his facebook page. It filmed from his garden out over the fields behind our houses and back, showing our house and back garden very clearly. That made me feel a bit weird, because we like our privacy, and suddenly random people on social media got a view of a bit of our lives, you know?

Since then he has been using it out the back, presumably practicing with it. We have seen it flying around in the field behind our houses. A couple of evenings ago we were having our usual coffee in the conservatory and the drone was hovering at and then flying past the very end of our garden. We obviously don't know whether he was capturing us (sat in our window) in that footage but it felt uncomfortable because, as said above, we like being private and don't like feeling like we are now potentially on display as we do our normal private things at home.

We haven't mentioned either thing to him because it is awkward. We and easygoing, avoid conflict, and good neighbourly relations make a big difference to having a happy life! 😄 Yes, that makes us sound like saps but it is just that we have reached that stage in life where we can't be doing with other people's nonsense 😄

This morning, though, I have felt quite upset by the drone thing. I got up at 6 and went out in my dressing gown to let the chickens out, as usual, and found that the drone was directly above the middle of our garden!! I stood there staring at it until it flew away and he landed it next door, so am guessing he could see me on his display screen. AIBU to feel intruded upon? I do not want to have to make sure I am decent just to walk through the back of my house (windows at the back have no blinds and are not overlooked by anyone). We have 3 kids, two of whom are still young enough to happily wander around the house and garden partially clothed, and in the summer often wander around naked. We really like living in a house and location where we are not overlooked, not because we do anything weird or illegal 😄 but because we are just private people. This situation is very uncomfortable. Am still pondering what to do about it, whether to go talk to him about how it feels, or post a message to him throgh his facebook page the coward's option or what? I believe what he is doing is not within the bounds of the law because he is 'filming a person within 50 metres without consent'.

Don't need this crap. And I know some of the other neighbours, who are also having their back gardens captured on film, would not react so passively.

Any thoughts on handling this sensibly? I don't think I should write FUCK OFF in white stones on my lawn, not yet anyway!

OP posts:
Dragongirl10 · 15/06/2017 19:41

Are either you or DH a good shot? maybe some clay pigeon practice....

loaferloveforyou · 15/06/2017 19:49

What a tease!

Sparkletastic · 15/06/2017 20:19

Come on OP. I've resorted to Diners Drive-ins and Dives Confused

LakieLady · 15/06/2017 20:59

My friend's horse was spooked by a drone, bruffian. She was shaken, but managed to stay on and get him settled eventually.

We had a spate of people "losing" drones round our way, and the owners would post on the local internet forum asking if anyone had any info about them. They generally got a fair amount of flack for losing sight of the bloody things, but on one occasion someone posted that they had found it in the street by their house and the owner arranged to collect it. When he got round there, the "finder" presented the drone owner with an estimate for respraying the roof of his car, which was scratched to buggery when the drone hit it. Grin

I think people should have to be licensed before they can buy the bloody things.

WelliesAndPyjamas · 15/06/2017 22:27

Ok, sorry I kept you, and so sorry about sparkletastic needing to resort to Diners Drive ins and Dives Shock

So...neighbour has been pretty quiet since the chat with DH. He has used the drone but discreetly for short trips from his garden, down the back field, and back. Possibly testing the battery or something before taking it out elsewhere.

But yesterday, DD was in preschool and I wasn't working so I spent most of the day dejungling gardening. The weather being much better and less windy, he was using the drone a lot: up and down the back field, all along the backs of everyone's houses (along the end boundaries), and also high up above. I ignored it to start with but started getting more and more annoyed that I, and all my neighbours, were having their back gardens filmed Angry

Now, understand that I was a bit tired from mowing the lawn for ages, and probably dehydrated Blush but I did something which I am a bit embarrassed by, but mostly amused by Grin ...I, being a middle aged woman in the privacy of her own garden, with no neighbours overlooking it, covered by six foot fences to both sides...and feeling a bit hot and sweaty on a sunny day...I, erm, took the straps down off my sundress and let the dress rest on my waist and did some topless gardening for a good five minutes! And there is no doubt in my mind that it would have been visible to the drone at the end of the garden!

He may or may not choose to use the drone at the end of my garden again, but I think not after that eyeful which would be extremely difficult to explain to his wife or the police

OP posts:
TenForward82 · 15/06/2017 22:35

He may view that as a come on...

WelliesAndPyjamas · 15/06/2017 22:38

No, I really doubt it. Plus, I didn't display any awareness of the drone being there (which would suggest it was a come on). I just carried on with what I was doing, just enjoying the breeze in new places! He was the one who happened to be filming my garden without consent.

OP posts:
NellieFiveBellies · 15/06/2017 22:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TenForward82 · 15/06/2017 22:40

Hey, no judgement from me! Just if he starts giving you wiggly eyebrows next time you bump into him, you'll know why Grin

NellieFiveBellies · 15/06/2017 22:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WelliesAndPyjamas · 15/06/2017 22:45

Oh, no, the topless gardening was for five minutes. It flew past the end of the garden once during that time. Hope that makes more sense!

Yes, he has footage of me topless but pah, I am not bothered, and it really will not be anything special after three big babies and five years of breastfeeding 😄

OP posts:
SequinsOnEverything · 15/06/2017 23:46

I'd be getting suspicious of why he keeps filming along all the gardens when he knows neighbours aren't happy. Maybe it's not as innocent as you think.

I'd have gone and had a go at him not showed him my boobs though

DrJZoidberg · 16/06/2017 00:05

If he's a peeping Tom type this will have the opposite effect you were after 😂

kwick · 16/06/2017 07:55

I admire your panache and presence of mind @WelliesAndPyjamas!!! Please keep us updated on what happens next!!!

Huffletuff · 16/06/2017 08:04

Grin I so hope that's put him off.

If not, I think I'd have no bollocks whatsoever and draft an anonymous letter from "a few of your neighbours" and point out the legalities.

WelliesAndPyjamas · 16/06/2017 08:10

Thanks, @kwick (loving this new @ stuff, I get email alerts that someone is thinking of me talking to me on a thread 😎 great for when I forget I had started one!). I know not everyone agrees with the toplessness but I feel fine with what I did, despite it being a bit wild. I feel there is nothing he can say or do now that justifies him capturing footage of me doing whatever the hell I want in my own garden. It is not a case of flashing because the garden is not overlooked in any direction (neighbours all have bungalows, we have tall fences, it is open fields in the back, not used by walkers) so I think that puts him in the wrong, not me? Sorry, rushed explanation...I really should be getting out the door now!

OP posts:
WelliesAndPyjamas · 16/06/2017 08:14

I might drop it in to conversation with a couple of the braver more forthright male neighbours if it carries on, to see if they feel like addressing it, huffletuff 😄

OP posts:
Supersoaryflappypigeon · 16/06/2017 08:18

Grin brilliant update!

JakeBallardswife · 16/06/2017 08:25

Loving the topless gardening! Grin

deffoncforthis · 16/06/2017 11:04

If he's a competent photographer and a generally good neighbour, ask him to make sure he does not film or photograph your garden or anything about it, let alone publish it. You don't have to be unfriendly, or suggest he's a peeping Tom, you just have to make it very clear this is something you expect to happen, that whatever he is/isn't recording you don't want to see the glint of a camera lens whilst in the privacy of your own garden again. Perhaps point out that drones make you feel very uncomfortable.

If he's genuinely a nice man as you say, you might find he's just totally understanding and goes to an effort not to disturb you.

I think it's worth starting out a conversation with a neighbour about something like this on the basis they are a considerate human being, you might be pleasantly surprised and avoid a completely unnecessary load of nonsense.

There's actually plenty you can do if he behaves like an arse, so that is open to you.

ChameFangeNail · 16/06/2017 11:37

You should've spelled out 'nosey drone wanker' on your lawn with grass clippings.

Backinthebox · 16/06/2017 13:33

I fly passenger jets for a living. Unlicensed drone operators have managed over 70 recorded airprox incidents (aka near misses with passenger aircraft) in the last year, including people who think it's hilarious to fly directly over airports and their approach paths. Stupid fuckers, the lot of them. So many people buy them as toys and have no idea how to fly them or even what the rules are surrounding them - as evidenced by the number of out there. The fact that people actually lose them shows that they have no understanding at all of the damage they could potentially do. I'd be inclined to buy a catapult, I think.

7461Mary18 · 16/06/2017 14:08

I am afraid knowing most men your going topless is going to encourage not discourage him but who knows. He should not be using it to film people's gardens. Google earth have of course which many people don't like and that in itself is very useful for burglars - size of house etc etc. It is a huge privacy issue. we haven't let google images come up our roads (private roads) but we cannot stop google earth.

Someone linked above to the following. Soeone shouel invent a drone deflector you can position it in your garden and ensure the drone gets no footage as it is noticed by the technology and a bright light shone at the drone.

"Can I fly over someone's land?

You need permission from the owner of the land if you will take off or land on their property.

Flying over someone's property is more of a grey area. Currently, the rights of a property owner are restricted in relation to the airspace above his or her land to such a height as is necessary for the ordinary use and enjoyment of his land.

In other words, you can fly in the airspace over their land (but not higher than the general rule of 400ft) as long as you do not cause a nuisance, infringe their privacy or otherwise interfere with the "ordinary use and enjoyment" of the land.

It would be down to a a judge to decide whether or not a drone pilot was infringing these rights, should a case go to court."

7461Mary18 · 16/06/2017 14:13

Some people take the law into their own hands

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