to have arrived unannounced?

[ChiantiOnTap]

I'm looking for a nursery for my daughter to start in September. She'll be 2. Me and my husband decided to visit a potential yesterday to look around. We didn't ring ahead as I wanted to see what it was like on an average day (as far as possible).

The nursery refused us entry and specifically stated that we don't have DBS checks (coincidentally we both do as we work with vulnerable people in NHS roles but they weren't to know that). When I queried further they said that the parents of the children would need to be notified of our presence and they couldn't do this now.

AIBU to think that this is batshit? When they take them out to the park or wherever there could be all number of people hanging around without DBS checks. But they're the responsible adults that the parents have trusted to safeguard their children surely?

I wouldn't expect to be left in a room alone with the children btw. Just escorted through, briefly observing whatever happened to be going on at the time.

AIBU? Is this not a thing?

The DBS and notifying other parents is over the top but I would not be happy if DS' nursery allowed drop ins. We had to book an appointment and no-one is allowed into the nursery who isn't known to the nursery staff. They even quiz DH as he doesn't do many pick ups and he is so glad they do as it reassures him that our son isn't in danger from strangers.

Er, YABU. Since you work with vulnerable people I'm amazed you don't see the value of DBS, and that you you think it's fine for uninvited, unchecked randomers to come in 'for a look.'

Apart from anything else, they would need a extra staff member on hand to do the 'tour' - I don't imagine most nurseries have a spare member of staff hanging around doing nothing just in case someone comes in off the street making demands! If nothing else, booking ahead means you visit at a time that's suitable for the children (eg. not when they're napping or being changed) and when there's a member of staff free to show you round without compromising the care of the existing DCs.

Don't understand the dbs thing but none of nurseries I saw allow open door due to naps etc

And extra staff to do the tour. One place I saw had the person showing me nursery and minding the children... it was chaos and I ended up running out of that place

So, since every day is a "normal working day," what you mean is that you were on a spy mission, hoping to catch them out?

YABU

I agree with the other posters. What if 6 or 7 parents turned up just wanting a look around?

They have no idea who you are and unless you carry all your 'checks' with you they don't know if you're telling the truth. It's called safeguarding.

Make an appointment like everyone else.

I would be very reluctant to enrol my children in a nursery that just let in random strangers.

They have to have safeguarding policies in place to protect their children, and whether it's open-door or not they need a system in place.

Just discount this nursery. This is a huge red flag. They don't want you to see what they are up to so you don't want your child to go there.

Sorry: just realised you just turned up. I though they wouldn't let you make an app to visit. Aren't you glad they don't let local weirdos enter the nursery whenever they feel like it? They are proving they prioritise keeping children safe over potential business. This is a good sign.

Yabu. Im looking at nurseries at the moment. Every single one needs an appt to view. It be vvvvv worried about any nursery letting anyone in from the street to view.

Imagine if your dd said mummy i was talking to man and lady today did you dd who were they , nurseries cant drop everything to show randoms about im sorry for people who claim to have a disclosure what you did was just stupid

The Dbs comment meant well you didnt make an official appointment we can't let you in not that parents of attending children need a dbs

Love the idea that babies and toddlers could be stage managed to any degree for planned visitors anyway!

I viewed 4 nurseries and all of them required an appointment. I wouldn't even have thought just to turn up to be honest. My DS's nursery is outstanding rated and has a waiting list a mile long, they have nothing to hide. They show people round most days so it's not as if they are setting it up especially - they're too busy to do that!

One of the nurseries we viewed even made us bring photo ID to check we definitely were who we said we were.

I worked in a care home and many a time had people want to look around without an appointment it gives a better overview of the home on a normal day to day bussiness. I don't see it being any different to looking round a nursery with an employee.

Actually I'm confused.

OP, were you expecting to be able to just walk in and walk around by yourself?

If not ( so wanted someone to take you round), how is that any less safe than a booked in app? Does everyone think they do checks on people with appointments?

I think ops point is that she wanted to be able to see the nursery as it was, not "set up" ready for someone visiting.

Yes YABU! Our nursery has a policy that you make an appointment for a tour. You can't just pitch up if you like but if they don't have enough staff to cover then you will be turned away.

I would never presume it would be ok to just turn up without checking the nursery have that policy in place.

Lots of people have made the point social that apart from the safeguarding lots of nurseries will want appts so that meal and nap times aren't disturbed. Also the manager can't just sit around all day doing nothing in case someone drops in. What if someone drops by when they are in the middle of a menu planning session or creating invoices?

I highly doubt things will be 'set up' as the staff won't have a the time for that plus you can't really 'set up' young children.

YABU. Of course they don't let people in off the street! The nursery I use has an appointment only policy. They need to give you time they won't have if you have a tour.

I can see your point about wanting to see the nursery as it is but having worked in a nursery myself it is annoying when people arrive on spec expecting the full guided tour. Activities were planned, staff ratios planned for the day without somebody tramping through while you are trying to get fourteen babies down for a nap. You are being very unreasonable and should be glad that they didn't let you in it shows that they are keeping their small people safe. You definitely don't need a DBS check to go round just to be supervised by someone who does. Hop you find a nursery for your daughter but move fast, to he good ones for quickly.

Nursing homes have visitors a lot (you'd hope). Not comparable to nurseries where the idea is to provide childcare whilst the parents are busy elsewhere.

Advice has obviously changed then. When I was looking for a nursery for DS and DD 20 odd years ago the advice was to go without an appointment if possible and treat anywhere that insisted you go to their schedule with great suspicion.

As it was the only one that I could get a place at was one that needed an appointment. I made it clear that DD was not to go into a baby walker (when the dangers of them where being very publicised). My friend went to view it and saw, guess what? I withdrew her that day.

Lots of differing experiences here. When we were looking for ds1 all the nurseries I called said to call in at any time as they didn't want parents thinking they were putting on a "best behaviour show" for their benefit.