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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's weird when women take their DHs clothes shopping with them?

210 replies

Madmotherintheattic · 07/05/2017 20:10

I mean when the blokes sit on those chairs outside the changing rooms and give them opinions on every outfit they come out in. I don't mean special occasion outfits but everyday stuff. And then accompany them round the shop feeling material and picking out styles? I see it a lot in M&S. Is it weird or is it me? I don't know whether to feel happy for them that their husbands are so involved or think I should just mind my own business, but instead, I find myself thinking I'd rather stab myself in the eye with a pencil than take DH to watch me try on skirts in M&S and comment on patterns and shapes.

OP posts:
PunkrockerGirl · 07/05/2017 21:06

YANBU.
I hate clothes shopping with anyone else. Just why would you drag a partner round with you - can you really not choose stuff for yourself? Hmm
And yy to entire families doing the weekly shop. Just why?
If there's 2 adults, why doesn't one stay at home with the dc or take them somewhere else? thus freeing up space in the supermarket for those of us who need to nip round quickly
It's the weekly grocery shop, not a day out at Legoland ffs Hmm

Astro55 · 07/05/2017 21:08

I see this all the time - family day out?? Really totally boring!

Take the kids to the park or leave DH some chores - frees up better quality that me later

CakeNinja · 07/05/2017 21:08

Ahh, dp is not my best friend! And I definitely don't want his opinion on what I'm wearing. I also don't consider it spending time together, and I can buy my own clothes with my earnings!
As you can guess, we don't shop together. He shops for himself and ds, I shop for myself and take the dds to get their stuff.
I do the majority of mine online anyway as shopping isn't a leisure activity for me.

As others have said, no problem if the other half actively wants to spend their time going round and round the shops, but a friend of mine says things like "I don't see why he should be able to relax and do his own thing when I'm busy doing boring things," which I take for code as "I'm really needy!" - otherwise, what sense does it make for both people to be miserable?!
Each to their own, it doesn't upset me in any way.

derxa · 07/05/2017 21:09

Mine comes along because he pays for it. I'm sorry but that's shocking and I'm the least feminist person on MN.

Longdistance · 07/05/2017 21:09

Omg, I would never torture my Dh through going shopping with me,

It's torturous enough for me on my own with size 8 feet, 36" inside leg, and 38 H boobs.

I'll go in my own thanks.

IfNot · 07/05/2017 21:10

Yeah, it's weird. I don't even like shopping with women friends. I shop alone, fast and focused like a ninja. Grin And I know what suits me.
The last time I was anywhere near a shop with him indoors he pointed at this floral polyester smock thing that was like something my mother might wear in an emergency and said "that's nice".
No chance. If he was paying, as pp have mentioned,he would just have to give me his credit card, no need to actually be there!

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 07/05/2017 21:11

I can't get my head round a husband being a better judge of what looks good than his wife. Confused
Surely he'll just agree that he like the first things you try on just so you can leave the shop?

I think clothes shopping is great fun. I much prefer it alone. I'd feel like I was boring another person faffing about in shops, looking at everything.

Arealhumanbeing · 07/05/2017 21:11

I absolutely hate it when men hang around the women's changing rooms.

Tw1nsetAndPearls · 07/05/2017 21:12

I can't get my head round a husband being a better judge of what looks good than his wife.

I can't get my head around my arse to get a back view - he can.

Sparklingbrook · 07/05/2017 21:13

I am always Hmm when the woman comes out of the changing rooms to show their DH/Partner who is sat on the bored chair outside.

Tw1nsetAndPearls · 07/05/2017 21:14

Take the kids to the park or leave DH some chores - frees up better quality that me later

We might go for a family day out, a picnic and walk up the river for example and then on the way home we may pop into the supermarket.

IfNot · 07/05/2017 21:14

Surely he'll just agree that he like the first things you try on just so you can leave the shop?

Of course he will!!

mewkins · 07/05/2017 21:16

I could think of nothing worse. I prefer to take the kids with me and that's saying something!

SafeWord · 07/05/2017 21:21

I don't like anyone's opinion really when im shopping. I know what I like and im too self conscious and self deprecating to think anyone would want to spend that time choosing my clothes.

AnyFucker · 07/05/2017 21:23

Did I misunderstand you, Barbara ? Soz Blush

user1486076969 · 07/05/2017 21:23

I have to shop alone

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 07/05/2017 21:32

Surely the bottom line is we are all different. Some people enjoy going shopping with their dh/dp, others hate it. Some people want their dp's opinion, others don't.

There is no one right way to do it - so why judge someone who does it differently to you? Does it harm you if some other woman's dh is opening on their choice of clothes?

Frillyhorseyknickers · 07/05/2017 21:32

YANBU - they are the worst type of women.

I'm fucking shopping, I'm busy concentrating on shopping related thoughts - I do not need to have to negotiate your awkwardly placed husband who is quite frankly in my fucking way. Either train him to stand somewhere no-in-the-way, or leave him at home.

It's worse than those people who drag their poor bastard dogs around country fairs.

Confused
ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 07/05/2017 21:33

I can't get my head around my arse to get a back view, he can Grin

That made me laugh (although you could just take a small mirror with you to see the back?)

Emboo19 · 07/05/2017 21:34

Depends on my mood and what I'm shopping for to a degree. But I do like going shopping with my boyfriend, he's good at spotting things I might over look.
And he's really good at gift shopping.

I don't do trying on in shops though, I buy and just return if it doesn't fit or suit me.

We've only dd 7 months so she's in the pram, don't know how it will work when she's older.
I always went shopping with my parents (dad more than mum) though and really enjoyed it. I think because they went to mostly small independent shops, not really the next/Debenhams type shoppers and they always got to know and chat to the people there.
Still quite like going in town with my dad now tbh!

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 07/05/2017 21:36

"...the worst kind of women..."

What judgemental crap.

gracielooloo · 07/05/2017 21:37

Hmm, I'm undecided on this!
Yesterday we went shopping as a family ooh the horror!, but this was because the nearest large shopping centre is an hour away from us. We were at a park beforehand, then nipped to said shopping centre to get a few things for everyone.
Is that weird? (Not that I care!)😉

SuperPug · 07/05/2017 21:41

No, he hates it. My mum and dad love it though, probably my dad more than my mumGrin
TBH, I don't like shopping with other people. I like to spend my own time, maybe go back if I'm undecided etc.
Had one awful experience with a work colleague in Bicester where I lost the will to live after the third shop so I can understand that it's boring if it's not your kind of shop etc.

Frillyhorseyknickers · 07/05/2017 21:41

What judgemental crap.

Well we all know where your OH is when you're shopping then..!

I can even it up a bit and say the men who agree to follow their OHs around shops like some submissive dog go shopping are also the worst type of men. 🙄

Sallystyle · 07/05/2017 21:43

I don't like clothes shopping much but dh often comes with me and we will both get clothes at the same time followed by dinner so we make a day of it. It makes it bearable knowing we are going out to eat after and I'm spending time with him which is always lovely.

I don't need his opinion, I know what suits me and what I like but shopping with him is more fun than shopping on my own. I don't like going with my mum because she spends ages in every single shop and the friend I would go with has a toddler and as much as I love her I would rather not go shopping with a toddler after doing it with five of my own.

It doesn't really matter does it? Nothing wrong with wanting your husband's opinion if you are unsure on something, nothing wrong with enjoying going with him. Nothing wrong if you don't want to go with him either.