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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ohfuckohfuckohfuuuuuuck

282 replies

SmileEachDay · 06/05/2017 11:26

One of those massive, massive bastarding black house spiders has moved in to the top corner of my living room.

What the fuck do I do? I can't hoover it because it might...I can't even say it....but fall...you know? I can't just leave it because it gives me THE HORRORS.

😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩

OP posts:
Ketzele · 07/05/2017 22:56

I agree, Jesuswept, I just want to be able to function, be an adult, when faced with a spider.

Many years ago I went with an aid agency to a dangerous part of the world. We had to be accompanied everywhere by armed soldiers - at one point we had to take an internal flight because it was simply too dangerous to drive. Some aid workers had been taken out and shot from the place we were staying just a week or two before we got there.

All I could think of was the spiders. I'm not a brave person, but I honestly couldn't find headspace to fear for my life, because it was all taken up with fear or arachnids. I realise how ridiculous that is.

Spectre8 · 07/05/2017 23:00

I am spider ready this year, spread diatomaceous earth along side the edge of the house, got my spider insect sprays ready and spray the window sills when I open them... determined to have another spider free year. Last year I only had two, one was massive and had come up from the back of the sink, which reminds me I need to spray the back of the sink cupboard!

DJBaggySmalls · 07/05/2017 23:01

I use clove oil. Problem is it stops the bastards leaving as well.

LuluJakey1 · 08/05/2017 00:31

DH was once bitten by an insect (couldn't say for definite it was a spider) on one of his balls on our first holiday together- on a Greek island. We didn't know each other that well at the start of the holiday but I knew him very well by the end having spent a week of it cooped up with him and his giant ball in a tiny beach villa which was basically a small bedroom, a small bathroom and a small livingroom. He refused to go to a Dr and I had to go to a chemist and mime what was wrong with him 🙄I was given antibiotics and an ointment and had to apply the ointment to it several times a day. He carried the beach ball testicle round in a sort of mini hammock because it was so swollen and heavy and he could not bear any clothing n it for a couple of days. I still call him Buster Gonad and his Unfeasably Large Testicle. I have photos of it lcked away in a safe place for blackmailing purposes.

TheClaws · 08/05/2017 03:21

I went to turn on my aircon the other day and a little redback spider was hanging out on the control panel. I've been bitten by one on the foot too - that one was in my bathroom. I didn't feel it for a bit then it became quite hot and stingy/sensitive, and came out in a little ring of sweat just around the bite area. I had a headache the next day and my foot was sore and a bit red, but otherwise I was fine!

flapjackfairy · 08/05/2017 08:00

I find that i am fine when they are outside but in the house i feel trapped and panic sweeps over me. And does anyone else find it is worse when it is dark outside. In daylight i cope much better with them in the house but if they appear at night it totally petrifies me.
I am seriously going to look at the zoo thing.
By the way do we know what happened to op . Have i missed outcome or is she still unable to brave her home or worse still unconcious from fear face down in the living room?

PurpleNurple69 · 08/05/2017 08:18

Thanks to this thread, I spent the majority of my drive into work this morning looking around the car for spiders! There's nothing worse than spotting one of those fuckers belting down the motorway SadI mean wtf are you supposed to do?

Ketzele · 08/05/2017 08:32

Another anecdote from the spider friendly course here: people having car crashes or throwing themselves out ofmoving cars because of spiders Sad.

My own story of shame: when my six month old baby had a big spider on her and I couldnt save her. Instead I kept batting HER (not the spider) with a rolled up magazine to try to dislodge it Blush

Mulledwine1 · 08/05/2017 09:44

people having car crashes or throwing themselves out of moving cars because of spiders

I could imagine me doing something that stupid if a wasp got into the car.

I think my car does have a resident spider but it's only a little one. I might be less keen if it was a big hairy house spider though.

Years and years ago I saw a programme on TV about some people who took over an abandoned house that was full of "nature" (read, spiders). They renovated it and got rid of all the wildlife. The last bit of the TV programme showed you a spider finding its way back in. Well, they are called "house" spiders.

PurpleNurple69 · 08/05/2017 09:47

Oh Ketzele, I know it's wrong to laugh but I just couldn't help it! It's exactly the kind of thing I would do (but would never admit it!).

I did ram the pram at the front door repeatedly to try and kill a spider - and baby daughter was in it at the time. I ended up spraying it with oven cleaner - killed the spider but it also stripped the chrome off the pram chassis!

BertrandRussell · 08/05/2017 09:55

People who are phobic- there is very effective treatment available.

People who are just shrieky- get a grip and deal with it. Imagine what you would think of a man who behaved like that.

spiderlight · 08/05/2017 10:33

Ketzele I once did similar - was breastfeeding baby DS and a huge spider came up the side of the cushion thing he was lying on. I flung the entire cushion to the other end of the sofa, DS and all! Blush

And yes I know it's pathetic from the outside. I have had treatment. It didn't work :(

Crowdblundering · 08/05/2017 10:36

I'll remove it for you - Grew up on a farm Smile

Original poster
SmileEachDay · 08/05/2017 17:11

It's disappeared 😩

So I now can only perch on the edge of my sofa because if I lean back I might get...got...

I'm going to do a course in the summer hols. I can't deal with the horrible panic and the constant vigilance.

OP posts:
PurpleNurple69 · 08/05/2017 17:38

Holy hell crowdblundering - a spider farm? ConfusedGrin

BasiliskStare · 08/05/2017 18:58

" People who are phobic - there is effective treatment ." Do you have a phobia? I could not even begin to think of going somewhere where I am gently introduced to the subject of my very irrational fear. Snakes - bring 'em on, rather lovely and elegant creatures, , mice , fine . rats - yep deal with that , Crabs , Lobsters , absolutely fine , spiders, cannot do it , it is an utter sweat inducing , vomiting , can't breathe phobia. It's silly, I know that , and I wish I did not have it - I don't know where it came from , but I have it.

PurpleNurple69 · 08/05/2017 19:43

Agreed basilisk - I have no intention of getting treatment. I don't know where my fear comes from either. And it's only spiders really - snakes beetles bees ants mice birds - all of them are fine. But spiders daddy long legs and, randomly, king crabs and spider crabs - absolutely panic attack. Daddy long legs are spiders with wings and crabs are spiders with a crispy coating.

I can't even look at a picture of a spider

flapjackfairy · 08/05/2017 19:46

Oh smile glad you are back. Thought you had left home permenantly and left us all hanging.
Try not to think about it (i know i know . Stupid thing to say! I am sweating just thinking of that sofa.) Hopefully it is long gone never to be seen again !
Shall we have a group outing to the zoo ??

Madmotherintheattic · 08/05/2017 20:55

Buy a handheld Dyson with the long tube, suck it up and then put the Dyson in the dustbin, put the lid on very tightly, and let the binmen take it. Buy another Dyson for next time.

Original poster
SmileEachDay · 08/05/2017 21:17

Yes please, flapjack
Then at least if we chicken out we can have a nice day seeing the animals and eating ice cream Grin

OP posts:
flapjackfairy · 08/05/2017 21:42

Madmother you jest but i had a friend who practically did that. She sucked them up the dyson and would then put it outside even if it was raining until her husband got home to empty it .

BasiliskStare · 08/05/2017 21:52

Ah now interestingly , Purple , Daddy long Legs , I can deal with. How funny. (Well not funny but I hope you see my point) I am not at all scared of crabs / lobsters etc. That said I cannot look at a photograph of a spider ( and indeed it took me a while to type it) Even the word brings me out in shivers. There used to be an advertisement with S 's ,
for a film which was advertised on buses, ( Aracnaphopia - had pictures ) and I used to have to drive past them with one with one eye closed, not safe surely? I actually think Daddy Long Legs are quite nice - they are not S s .

Madmotherintheattic · 08/05/2017 22:05

OMFG put it outside. I should have thought of that. But what if it crawled out and came back in?

I was only semi-joking. I did buy one of these suck up things once:
www.amazon.co.uk/KatchaTM-Buster-Spider-Vacuum-Blue/dp/B009PNXV40/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1494277449&sr=8-1&keywords=spider+sucker&tag=mumsnetforum-21

But, how can the makers be so stupid, the cylinder thing is SEE THROUGH. So I sealed it in a bin bag and put that in the bin (DH was overseas for 3 days). I should have left it in the garden. Duhh.

PurpleNurple69 · 08/05/2017 22:26

I know daddy long legs only have 6 legs and are most definitely not a spider but they're just so dangly and there's no fucking escaping them. - they follow you around the room!

Anybody else getting a spider 🕷 emoticon????

BasiliskStare · 08/05/2017 22:27

Could we just not do the spider emoticon thing ? Grin Please. Just on this thread? Smile