DS11 seems "unreasonably" interested in what's for dinner/lunch. Or AIBU?

[Evelight]

Unfailingly he asks what is for dinner, often following up with what is for dinner tomorrow and sometimes even the day after. He reacts to whatever it is- happily or sadly- and if he doesn't like it complains a fair amount until i tell him to knock it off. He asks for specific lunches, going so far as to specify the type of bread (not just white or brown, but a specific brand of white). He asks for deep-fried chicken nuggets as opposed to oven-baked- and is willing to enter an exhausting discussion about it. Yesterday, we had a conversation like this:
-Can you make that Filipino beef dish for dinner again?
-umm that needs soya sauce and sugar, and we're out
-Surely soya sauce and sugar are things that should always be in the house?

And I was like whaaa?

He is not a particularly "mature" or "thoughtful" child otherwise- stereotypical boy running around, mostly interested in his video games and sports. I am finding his concern with his food a bit exhausting and annoying. Also maybe greedy? I dunno, I just wish he would eat without a commentary, and without increasing, it feels like, instructions.

11 is not too old for stove tops and sharp knives!

If he was a scout he could be prepping and cooking dinner on a fire at camp!

Supervise at first, teach him to use the stove and knives safely, get him cooking.

If he can't be arsed to cook them he doesn't have the right to dictate to the person who does!

Oh my goodness. I will turn myself into the bad mom police ,. I just realised I actually still peel oranges for him as he simply does not know handle a sharp knife. And here you folk are talking about baking apple pies aged 18 months or whatever.

Jamie Oliver knife skills video:

My DS has been interested in food to a similar extent from a similar age. He did Food Tech for GCSE and is considering becoming a chef. He cooks at least twice a week for the family - harness his interest while it lasts, you may despair of him not having interests in the near future if you discourage this.

Ds has been chopping onions from about 8, using this method. He has to sit at a table, with non slip mat under the chopping board.

He has recently mastered cups of tea, now he is a bit taller :D

Huh. I never thought of actually getting him to cook. At 11- a bit too early for stove tops and hot/sharp things?

he's 11! preschoolers can chop and cook with supervision!

OK, you have convinced me all. I will get him to help with the Filipino dish tonight- which will involved cutting the beef into strips, chopping garlic, melting butter with garlic and tipping rice into hot butter.

Quite the danger zone!!

And yes, mine sometimes goes grocery shopping with me. I take the opportunity to discuss price per 100g, etc between branded and own brand.

Did you see the link to the knife skills video?

www.jamieshomecookingskills.com/skills-specific.php?skill=howto-videos

Teaching him how to cook is a life skill. Let him help you with meal planning and prep and eventually move on to doing more himself. If he's concerned enough to make these comments then he is certainly mature enough to peel his own oranges

Doesn't he... Idk. Make sticks? Smores? Bonfires?

But yes, I think cooking would be a really useful "life skill".

When he becomes a massively successful international chef, and his signature dish based on beef strips stuns the world, you can thank Mumsnet .

Good luck with the knife skills. Thanks for the video.

diddl- Is there anything that should always be in the house??

Do you just buy stuff that you will use at one meal?

I have a big store cupboard and freezer full of stuff that I would hate to be without. From different mustards, mirin, anchovies a range of flours, types of rice, preserves, loads of spices, fermented bean curd, oils, olives, as well as tons of staples like cans of tomatoes, rice, pasta.
We all love to cook .

Surely you have to buy more soya and sugar than you would use for one meal?

I mean, you can't really get sachets at the supermarket can you, or at least, that would be a very expensive way to do it.

Like herbs, or flour if you're a baker.

By default if you cook a meal fairly often you'd expect to normally have those kind of flavour ingredients in the house.

Sounds like a foodie

One of mine is 12 and a bit like that. He asks about what meals are planned for the week. Puts alot of thought into how his food is put together, there's even an art to his baked beans on toast. He gets a particular meal idea into his head, requests it and talks aboout it. He also likes to create his own simple meals, nothing worthy of master chef but he gets a little creative. It usually involves bacon and cheese

I like him making requests, it makes putting the weekly meal plan together easier.

Interesting thread, I am considering buying this for my DC (5 and 9) but wondered if they were too young. and I have an expensive set of Japanese knives I don't want them to use

www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00GK67P7O/ref=ox_sc_act_title_3?smid=A3J2CUZAENGZN4&psc=1&tag=mumsnetforum-21

I hate to break it to you Eve but it's going to get worse. When boys hit puberty their capacity to eat is phenomenal and your food bill will rocket.
Safety is all about teaching. When DS2 was in boy scouts he wanted a penknife to whittle sticks. I taught him how to use it. He was never allowed it outside my supervision.
Mine did some basic cooking at primary school, secondary school was a bit rubbish for teaching the basics so I did that myself.

What helped with my two was writing up a list of meals we all like.
I never served up a meal that I knew someone didn't like.
Writing a weekly list of meals, allowing a little room for swapping.

My nephew does this. We have come to the conclusion that it is about control. It's his way of feeling in control of what's happening / going to happen. His life has a lot of turmoil at the moment (Dad left home), so I guess he feels there is a lot of instability. What he eats or does not eat is a small part of his life he can control. This may not apply to your DS though.

I'm always confused when parents complain that their child wants an input into the food they have to eat? Did you not grow up liking some things and not others? If my child doesn't like something I simply don't make it for her or she gets something different, why would you force a child to eat something they don't like? I wouldn't eat something I don't like and I don't care who made it, if I don't like it I can't force myself.

In the op situation though I agree with getting him involved, some people are into food more than others and I can't blame them for wanting an input, the cheekiness is a no go though.

"Do you just buy stuff that you will use at one meal?"

Well not exactly.

I have for example rice, pasta, spaghetti, herbs, spices in as I don't use a whole bag/box at a time.

But I've obviously bought them to use & there's some left.

But in the examples given in the op, if my husband didn't take sugar in tea & coffee there wouldn't be any in the house-also soy sauce-there's none atm as it got finished recently.

I won't buy it again until I intend to use it.

Egg dishes are a good thing to start them with, they can learn a few basic skills even with scrambled egg, baked egg or omelette. They're also easy to experiment with, like putting different cheeses, meat, spices and herbs in.

Eve my twins are 9 yo and have been helping with food prep for several years (chopping, mixing, measuring out ingredients etc).

They can also make their own tea and hot chocolate and do simple things like omelettes and cheese on toast.

Our next project is to teach them both to cook several main dishes from end to end.

At 11 years old I'd give him a budget and let him plan out the week's meals within the budget (online shopping is great for this).

My DH and his siblings weren't taught to cook at all by their parents before they left home and had to teach themselves as adults. My aim is to send my DC off to university fully able to cook, budget and maintain a house.

I won't buy it again until I intend to use it.*

OK. I find it easier to keep in stocks of stuff like soy sauce.
Atm I have six 500ml bottles of dark soy sauce, five bottles of light soy and 4 bottles of japanese Kikkoman in the garage. I buy stuff like that when it is on special offer.