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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

About DPs ex?

95 replies

TrudyBell · 02/05/2017 15:03

We've been together 3 years

He has a successful business and I earn a good amount. We pay 50/50 bills and have our own spending money. Pay 50/50 for holidays etc. It roughly works out the same. We are comfortable money wise.

His ex has 4 children, 1 is his (the youngest) she is 4. I'm not the OW but we got together a few mths after they split.

Ex works 16 hrs a week. As far as DP has told me she does admin work. The DD goes to a nursery (I've never been or seen it).

All of DPs accounts are at home after the tax year. They were on our shared desk and I had a quick flick through them. I have no idea really what he makes (rough idea as it's similar to me).

On his accounts he has her employed by him for 16 hrs minimum wage a week as an administrator Hmm. I asked him wtf?

Turns out she doesn't actually work for him at all, he pays her for doing nothing so she can get working tax credits without having to actually go to work. His argument is that they didn't want to put DD in childcare, she has 4 DC (and he's still close to the other 3) and he feels bad for leaving her with the baby.

I can't quite actually believe it. He said it's not really my business what his business does as long as he's paying what he should be into the bills and we are comfortable so what does it matter. He didn't tell me because I would "kick off".

AIBU?!

OP posts:
Original poster
TrudyBell · 02/05/2017 15:04

Surely that's some kind of fraud?

OP posts:
Batgirlspants · 02/05/2017 15:06

I can't see the problem really. Why would she want to put their child into childcare if they don't want to or need to.

I can't see it's any of your business sorry.

PlanIsNoPlan · 02/05/2017 15:07

Are you going to report your DP for fraud?

StewieGMum · 02/05/2017 15:09

It's fraud. The system is shit. I'd turn a blind eye.

Wando1986 · 02/05/2017 15:09

Not really. If she's legally employed by him and is paying through the books and NI contributions. Her job description and what it entails is irrelevant to her receiving the wage. Tbh it works out a lot cheaper than childcare too so I wouldn't be complaining too much.

Ratonastick · 02/05/2017 15:10

Err, yes that is tax fraud (bean counter here). It's also the oldest dodge in the books and is likely to get caught by HMRC at some point. If memory serves, he will have to pay interest and penalties and, I assume, repay WTC. It is rare for HMRC to push for prosecution these days as they don't have the manpower.

Justmadeperfectflapjacks · 02/05/2017 15:10

Could work to his advantage as she won't be able to keep going to him for more cm whenever it suits her. .

Ratonastick · 02/05/2017 15:11

Sorry, just to finish, it's known as ghost employment.

UppityHumpty · 02/05/2017 15:14

It's tax credit fraud. The question you have to ask yourself OP is whether you feel strongly enough to end your relationship over this? If yes then report him.

Iwasjustabouttosaythat · 02/05/2017 15:16

You need to mind your own business. He's taking care of his baby. What he's doing has absolutely nothing to do with you, and I think it's weird you mention his relationship with the other 3 kids too.

Batgirlspants · 02/05/2017 15:17

Rat come off it it's not tax fraud! Assuming he's paying her tax and NI and the wage is acceptable for the role! If HMRC went after all employed spouses they wouldn't be doing anything else.

SecretNetter · 02/05/2017 15:19

Of course it's fraud. She's claiming tax credits she's not entitled to, enabled by your dh.

On the grand scale of fraud though, in the same position, I'd probably do it if it meant my dc would benefit.

scottishdiem · 02/05/2017 15:22

I thought ghost employment was when someone (real or fictitious) was put on the payroll and the company was being defrauded. In this case, if the ex is on the payroll and all relevant taxes and NICs are being paid, I am not sure what HMRC would complain about?

SailAwayWithMeHoney · 02/05/2017 15:22

Is that not fraud?

littlejeopardy · 02/05/2017 15:22

It's fraud and he's lied to you for three years. The lying would bother me most of all. He either doesn't trust you with the truth or he knows he is doing wrong and doesn't want to get caught.

Either way I think I would seriously consider whether this is a relationship you want to keep. Lies are like mice; where there is one there is bound to be more.

SecretNetter · 02/05/2017 15:23

Of course it's tax fraud!

It's fraud on a double basis...the ex is getting WTC she's not entitled to and the op's dh will benefit from the tax breaks of paying another 'employee'.

Batgirlspants · 02/05/2017 15:26

Oh bugger so sorry missed the tax credit bit. Sad do apologise yes it's fraud and not good.

NotHotDogMum · 02/05/2017 15:33

It's tax fraud, now that you know you have no other option but to report them.

scottishdiem · 02/05/2017 15:36

Ah. Could well be fraud. HMRC definition of a worker on their website: "their employer has to have work for them to do as long as the contract"

Writerwannabe83 · 02/05/2017 15:36

So she doesn't actually do any work for him but he has her falsely recorded as an employee, gives her a wage and enables her to dishonestly claim tax credits as a result?

SemiNormal · 02/05/2017 15:40

You need to mind your own business. He's taking care of his baby. What he's doing has absolutely nothing to do with you, and I think it's weird you mention his relationship with the other 3 kids too - It has EVERYTHING to do with OP! She has just been made aware of a fraud scam. Benefits fraud is everyones business as far as I'm concerned. I hope you shop them both OP.

Quietwhenreading · 02/05/2017 15:42

It is fraud.

It's also quite common. I know lots of contractors whose wife or husband "works" for their limited company for the tax break.

Whether you are prepared to live with it is a different question.

I would suspect, given that he's fine with this that it's not the only dodge he employs with his company taxes. Again lots of them are quite common but how comfortable you are with it depends on where you draw your own moral lines.

ToastDemon · 02/05/2017 15:49

It is tax fraud but it's pretty common. For those saying report them - would you really expect someone to shop their partner that they presumably love? That would pretty certainly spell the end of the relationship.
I'm not saying I approve but most people don't live life in quite such a black-and-white way.

EleanorRigbysNeice · 02/05/2017 15:49

You know about it now. Can you continue the relationship? It is benefit fraud. He's knowingly lying and saying he employees her; she's lying and pretending to work to get money from the State. Can you live with this OP? If you do, you've not a leg to stand on on the moral high ground. Makes you an accessory imo.

MichaelSheensNextDW · 02/05/2017 15:51

Apart from the moral compass issue, which is personal to you and your call to make, I'd be concerned that you consider the safety of any joint money and joint assets you may have. In the event of any investigation and subsequent prosecution you do not want your money going down the pan.

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