Livid

[Crazyhair12]

AIBU here? I have just found out that my husband and his ex-partner took their child to the doctors together!! Nothing serious, just a minor skin ailment!! AIBU to be so f'ing annoyed that he never told me and I found out by mistake?

I would say YABU but my 'reverse-dar' is tingling

To be fair, surely in a marriage you talk about these sort of things?

No, he's under no obligation, but they are a partnership and surely it would just be good manners to mention it?

You're livid that two people took their child to the doctor?

To be fair, surely in a marriage you talk about these sort of things?

Well 2 things could have happened.

1 - he forgot to mention it. Most people forget to mention stuff at some point in their life. As Op said, it wasnt something really bad. So he may not have thought anything more about it.

2 - Since OP is livid about this, perhaps he knew she would go mad, that she isnt as ok with him doing things with ex as she says, but still wanted to go with his child. So didnt want to tell her.

Livid is a huge over reaction.

Did it cause him to miss some very important appointment?

If so he should have told you but livid is ridiculous.

If not YABU.

Livid is a huge over reaction, possibly but hyperbole is common on MN!

Livid is an over reaction. But I definitely would expect DH to tell me.

sorry if this sounds unkind but yabu. Your partner is doing the right thing. I presume you knew he had an ex and a child when you got together with him. Unfortunately this means that he will have to have a relationship with his ex for the duration of his or her childhood and that would definitely extend to doctors appointments. Having said that I do understand why you find it hard but I'm afraid yabu.

He should LTB.

When I think of the threads about fathers who don't care about their children and don't want to know how they are I am irked by this one.

Livid, really?!

Huge overreaction.

YABU

Why is it any business of yours?

Based on what you've written OP, YABU.

To be honest, I don't think I have always informed DH (the father of our DDs) that I have taken them to the GPs. Especially if it was for something really basic like ABs, or something.

And, I am eternally grateful that I don't know the ins and outs of DH's daily routine. Can't think of anything more tedious.

It comes across from your first post that it was about him going with her and not the lying. Hence the mention of the mundanity of the subject...as if if it had been serious you wouldn't have minded.

eh?

Think you might have your answer OP 😂

Did he lie about where he'd been that day or try to cover it up in some way? If not, then I don't understand why you're so angry about it. They're hardly likely to be shagging in the doctor's waiting room.
Do you know what the symptoms their child had? They may have thought it was something more serious. A suspected meningitis rash could have turned out to be just a minor skin ailment.

No back story then?!

Maybe he was scared to tell you.....

Yabu. It's none of your buisness if he takes his child to the doctors. It's the doctors not her bed.

If anything I think you need to pop off to the doctors

Your reaction is not normal at all

I don't know. Yes, it obviously seems like an over-reaction but I'm unwilling to say OP is being unreasonable without knowing the context.