To think breastfeeding has made no difference to my dd and is massively overrated in terms of benefits?

[Placeanditspatrons]

I've nearly driven myself to a breakdown feeding my dd. She is 16 months now and I'm still feeding. She has been ill more times and worse than my formula fed from four months son. She does not recover any faster and she catches anything I get and gets it worse, despite supppsedly the antibodies passing to her and either preventing or reducing the severity of the illness.

I know it's anecdotal and the studies say overall bf babies are healthier but how much healthier? I mean I we talking one less cold? One less ear injection? Statistically? Many of my friends have said similar. Again anecdotal but I can't help wondering - after the colostrum which is more important I guess - does it really make any noticeable difference?

No not one poster plenty of others with similar. I don't generally memorise names. You didn't seem to even remember Mini ever though you join forces on the grammar threads so not sure why I'm expected to memorise the multiple formula guilt monger ears that crop up on such threads.The sad smileys and stat twisting are even more frequent but have the same impact.You'd have to be somebody with a lot of time on their hands to have the inclination to scroll through every thread to link.

" in this country many women feel bullied in BFing by HCPs"

It's interesting, though, that people talk about being bullied into bf, but bf rates are still really low. And outside the HCP world, ff is very much the norm- nobody blinks an eyelid at seeing a baby being given a bottle, but lots of women report being driven to hide themselves away, particularly in the early days, to bf.

I think the perceived animosity between BFing and FFing mothers derives from the fact that in this country many women feel bullied in BFing by HCPs - when, on the evidence, FF is a perfectly valid and safe choice to make, if a woman wants to make it. That can lead women who FF to feel very defensive and (some) women who BF to feel smug.

I've never come across anyone who seems smug that they have breastfed their baby and even the mothers who are revolted by the fact that I was still breastfeeding my one year old didn't show me any animosity. Like the majority of posters on MN, most other mothers are supportive of people choosing what they believe is right for them and their baby.

Which camp do you sit in if you started off breastfeeding then moved to formula? Do you then have to feel animosity towards yourself?

I think the BF rate would go up dramatically with adequate support.

The problem isn't people choosing not to BF, it's that many start and then stop after being given inadequate support. E.g. Thinking cluster feeding means they don't have enough milk or whatever.

I do remember Mini-I just couldn't remember her name. And I didn'5 realize the mini something on grammar threads was her.

Any thoughts on the unpleasant posts about bf on this thread? As I said, happy to c&p.

I breast fed in the early days and never felt I had to hide away. Never liked getting my boobs out but never felt judged like I did when the bottles came out. Then on here the difference was huge. Some really hideous posts. I've seen mothers accused of being weak,lazy,foolish for not researching how hard it would be,selfish, willingly putting their babies at risk of SIDS....... the list is endless.

Why should I have any thoughts?

But you can't actually quote any of those hideous posts.

And you are still refusing to comment on the unpleasant posts on here about bf.

So because I can't post posts going years back,some of which have been deleted they don't exist?

Ds and his friends all got this horrific stomach flu that landed all of them but him in hospital, some for 3 days a couple for 5. Both doctors and a ped we saw said the only reason he managed to not go in was that I was nursing so for that reason alone I'm glad I did.

I BF DS2. When he was 18 months he became very ill, being sick a lot and losing weight fast, after a few weeks he was diagnosed with coeliac disease, his medical notes from that time include the term 'emaciated'. At the time of diagnosis he had blood tests to check for any deficiencies and his dietician was shocked to find he was not lacking in anything, she put it down to the fact he was still breast fed.

I think there is some confirmation bias at work in or memoirs of Heath visitors. For myself I was encouraged to top up with formula with both dcs, something I didn't want to do (and in the end, didn't have to). In the hospital all the babies around me were ff or mixed fed, I was the only one trying to solely bf. I felt very alone. As time went on and I would ask a GP is this medicine ok with bfing, I'd be looked at in surprise - still bf after 6 months? And after a year I just didn't mention it anymore.
Not sure where I'm going with this, I think I just don't recognise the pro-bf stance from hcp that people often talk about. I doubt my experience was any different to most, i just experienced it differently.
In terms of anecdota I was ff and am unhappy about various health related things that are sometimes linked to that. Who knows though? My IQ obviously not affected though

Memories not memoirs. Though memoirs of a HV could be a new BBC drama.

"So because I can't post posts going years back,some of which have been deleted they don't exist?"

I'm not saying they don't exist. But you said, among other things "Many breast feeders on here think their choice gives them Carte Blanche to lecture to others without umbridge in a way that is completely at odds with all other parenting choices.". Which is the sort of statement that needs supporting evidence.

And the implication was that nobody ever says anything horrible to/about bf. When I can come up with at least 3 examples from this thread alone.........

A poster used the word brestapo,not the best choice but over zealous breast feeding posters do exist and were what she was referring to.

Re sitting on the sofa,several have pointed out what she was referring to- a frequent reference from some bfers to just needing to sit on the sofa in order to crack bring. Said poster was pointing out this doesn't suit all mothers.She herself also explained her comment.

I have given you evidence- a name and the reminder of the over use of sad smileys,stat twisting,guilt mongering alongside pointing out not unreasonably that it is very difficult to link to direct quotes from others unless you're inclined to spend ours searching and scrolling past threads. But hey ignore when many over and again say does exist.

And the extraordinarily comments suggesting that people who use formula are somehow more highly evolved than breastfeeders? And "fucking breastfeeders"?

Oh come on, GreenGinger, you can only name one poster who is not posting on this thread and whose posts were deleted.

Of course when one is a new mother whatever choice you make is criticised. My dd had to endure months of being criticised for breastfeeding from her father's family. I'm sure if she had formula-fed other people would have jumped in to criticise her.

Sorry- that was a typo "fucking breastfeeding police" that should have said.....

"I'm sure if she had formula-fed other people would have jumped in to criticise her."

I bet they wouldn't. Formula is the norm in this country.

Of course I imagined it,it doesn't happen.

Happy now?

I don't think you can go purely off 2 children.
My first was ff. Not ill very often but bad eczema and allergies and then tonsillitis and ear infections a lot when a child rather than baby.
My second was bf until 18 months and hardly ever ill, no eczema or allergies and a lot more robust than her big brother. I swear by breastfeeding now, but in realitly, she might have been like that reglardless of what milk she had.

It does make me laugh when people only buy organic fruit and veg, won't use chemical cleaning products, limit additives and 'fake' foods in their diet and then pump their beautiful newborn babies full of chemically made additives and synthetic food. If you can't or struggle to breastfeed it's a great alternative and babies can thrive on it but honestly it's not 'better' in any sense.

"Of course I imagined it,it doesn't happen."

That's just silly. You have to be able to back up statements you make. Getting huffy when people won't accept unsubstantiated claims is a bit juvenile.

Lol, sunshine wins the thread.

If only MN had an eye roll emoji.

I don't bother buying anything organic and my toddler lives on quavers and rich tea biscuits