'Free birthing' AIBU to think this woman should not be encouraging people to do this

[WilliowGreen]

In this guardian article this woman boasts about her wonderful birth experience by rejecting all care including scans because "it was not empowering".
Before I had my baby (she is 2 weeks old) I would probably have thought her lack of self awareness was funny. Now it quite irrationally fills me with rage.
www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/apr/28/experience-i-had-a-free-birth.

She's disgusting, irresponsible and dangerous. And so is the Guardian for publishing this shit. Myself and so many friends, relatives and colleagues and our babies would be dead if we did what she did. I seriously fear for her child, she is not a fit parent. To think that all one has to do is 'choose positivity' and all will be ok - oh silly women/babies in other parts of the world where medical care isn't possible and you/baby die, why didnt you just choose positivity?? Complete moron.

'Radicalising motherhood' strewth

I see her point.

I hate (HATE) dealing with HCPs. Even though I'm married to a doctor. Especially for that reason, maybe. I didn't want the flu jab in pregnancy but I felt pressured into it (I held out.)

Sometimes the least you have to do with them, the better. But I do like the scans and listening to the heartbeat.

Shiny tellmeaboutit

I was recently berated by a man for 'talking loudly' to his wife whilst she was hypnobirthing.

For context she was 45 mins postnatal from a rural free birth on a trolley with a faint looking paramedic doing biannual compression with retained placenta and PPH. It. Was. Like. A. Tap.

12 units later she looked a bit better.

Bloody hell Shiny, how on earth would anyone be able to stop a pph with herbs? I had one after I went home with my first, I managed to bleed thro three towels wadded up in the time it took to ring the hospital.

It took several drips a lot of medication and a very frightened team at the a and e to help keep me alive!

I'm all for natural touch feely earth mother woo, but seriously why play with your life?

giles yes I see your point there and I'm sure that it does happen like that.

In my case ds was big and got stuck to put it simply . He was also in a strange position and unless he could have moved there wouldn't be a way he could have come out naturally. He got into difficulty and I had an emergency section so I'm not sure what the outcome would have been for the two of us had I have attempted that alone or if it could have been something that anyone could have changed with prior knowledge

However be in reference to your points about failings prior to actual birth at no point in any scan or pysical exam was it picked up on that he was big ( I was told he was going to be small !)

Im not saying this actually was a failing As I guess they can't be accurate with size but just to show I understand what you mean .

I don't understand why anyone would take such risks with their own lives and that of their child. They didn't used to offer flu jabs for pregnant women. I had to buy one in 2005.

Vaccines aren't risk free, but I won't get into that. Just that it was (for me) an informed choice as we had a family history of bad reactions to vaccines. But you don't really get treated as an individual within that - it's just 'ooh, you're pregnant/old/young - flu jab!'

I'm all for the natural approach, but I don't see how rejecting scans is helpful at all if you're wanting to give birth unassisted....

I do think that pregnancy and birth is over medicalised though. I think certain things can put a lot of unnecessary stress and worry on both the mother and baby, plus as someone has said upthread, I think some things are done just to cover the backs of staff (like standardised inductions etc.)

I meant I'm sure it does happen like that sometimes

I read the article. She's some sort of arty farty yoga teacher. Her partner is called Finn and the baby Fox. Ffs hipster wankyness. He's probably got a man bun and works in one of those artisan cafes that charge £9 for a deconstructed coffee.
She got lucky, the baby got lucky, Finn got lucky, he could so easily have been a childless widower. There's empowerment and then there's taking stupid risks for no reason.
Her blood pressure might have been fine but this story has done nothing for mine.

Ignorant arrogant woman! I also agree the guardian are massively irresponsible for publishing such nonsense!

Yes lots of women around the world don't have medical support/intervention and lots of women and babies die/are left seriously ill/disabled as a result!

She speaks as if scans, tests, vaccinations are done for shits and giggles! No! They are done to protect mother and baby and prevent them coming to unnecessary harm!

I've lost babies to mc, I have friends who have sadly experienced stillbirth/neonatal death. In those cases of it weren't for medical assistance the mothers would also have died.

I also have friends who've had complicated births where medical support has saved them and their babies and in some cases prevented the babies developing serious illness/disability.

She took a hell of a risk. It's one thing risking your own health/life, it's another risking that of another AND potentially needing MORE help than you would have if you'd had earlier intervention which is harder to do and costs more!

Selfish!

Free birthing can cause death, so no, I don't agree with advocating it.
Of course, birthing in any environment can cause death (to mother and/or baby) but at least if you're in a medically supported environment, there's a chance to prevent it where possible - if you're at home, then there's not. Especially with the reduction in emergency services that's ongoing at the moment - chances of an ambulance getting to you in time = less and less. :(

And I have to agree that you wouldn't be able to stop a PPH with fucking herbs!!
One of the worst working nights of my life was in the labs, providing blood and blood products for a young woman of 22 who was PPH after her 2nd baby - we tried for hours to stem the bleeding but nothing worked and at 7am they had to give her a hysterectomy to save her life. At 22!! Bloody horrendous, in every sense. If she'd been at home she would have died for sure.

Its amazing how proponants of this shit always have successful and happy outcomes. She wouldnt be encouraging free birthing if her baby had died or got stuck and had brain damage.

Stupid cow.

Not always, Pyongyang - sometimes they adhere to the madness even AFTER bad outcomes!
www.smh.com.au/nsw/babys-death-due-to-rash-mother-says-irate-coroner-20120628-215a2.html

She's an irresponsible twat but a very lucky irresponsible twat in that nothing went wrong during the birthing process (although I doubt she'd refer to it as a process, probably a journey or something equally wanky). Anyway God help poor old Fox growing up with parents like that.

I'm sure that around 2009 an Australian proponent of free birthing either died after or during giving birth or gave birth to a stillborn baby. The year sticks as I'm sure I was expecting dd.

My births have all been pretty horrendous - three assisted deliveries and a massive PPH following my only unassisted birth. I am incredibly thankful for the prenatal and postnatal care we have here from the NHS. (What does during birth come under? Pre? Post? Just natal?)

www.smh.com.au/national/health/babys-death-shines-harsh-light-on-free-birthers-20120405-1wfkv.html

It was her baby that died. She says stillbirth but I don't think it was- coroner suggested cord strangulation.

For me it's the thought of the millions of women out there right now who would give their right arm for a fraction of this quality medical care. A scan for their baby. A university educated medical professional to assess and care for you.

For most of human history, we have not had these things and women and babies died in terrifying numbers. To refuse them... it's a slap in the face to all the women. We are the luckiest population ever to have lived and I just don't understand turning one's back on that.

This isn't the dim and distant past either. I'm not British, and when my mother was pregnant in my home country, women did not get scans. My mother was/is very wealthy and well educated, she had private health care, but she couldn't get a scan. It only became widespread in the 90s.

Thumb shouldnt be surprised really should I? So sad :(

As someone with family who have no access to medical care, this makes me really angry.

My 19 year old SiL lost her baby after she slipped fetching water. She went into premature Labour and the baby got stuck. She walked 5 miles with the baby crowning, to get to a doctor

Very empowering

Couldn't agree with you more.

Isadora 'intrapartum'

annahibiscuits