'Free birthing' AIBU to think this woman should not be encouraging people to do this

[WilliowGreen]

In this guardian article this woman boasts about her wonderful birth experience by rejecting all care including scans because "it was not empowering".
Before I had my baby (she is 2 weeks old) I would probably have thought her lack of self awareness was funny. Now it quite irrationally fills me with rage.
www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/apr/28/experience-i-had-a-free-birth.

Superhero

I'm glad you had that time with your DD. I'm very sorry for your loss.

God that instagram made me laugh. It's all very 'first child' isn't it? That very special sort of first time mother who is convinced everybody else has been doing motherhood wrong all these years simply because they haven't had their example to follow.

Willow

Yes, that's it. She is not simply reporting what she did. She's advocating it. She's selling her book and her yoga business.

And 'everyday event' is a bit ridiculous when talking about childbirth, death, car crashes etc IMO. They aren't everyday events for the individual involved. I can't think of many things that aren't everyday events when taken from the point of view of all people across the whole world - the birth of the messiah perhaps?

UK has a relatively high number of maternal deaths for a country in the developed world.

But is this because it permits people to make choices that put their lives at risk? Is it because of preexisiting levels of poverty and obesity? Is it because of higher numbers of women from ethnicities with higher rates of complications?

Many of those first world nations with much lower maternal mortality are much less permissive than the NHS.

She is off her rocker and personally I believe information is power
women in this country are lucky enough to have care to save there lives and their babies
Not to mention the damage that can be caused
By not having any type of basic care e.g. Folic acid

I've had three babies and I can understand the "hands off" in labour stance. My best birth was the one where the midwife said nothing did very little, let me get on with it, but was just there watching on if she needed to intervene. My worst was the most medicalised.

But rejecting scans and tests is a bit crazy. I think some of these crunchy women lose sight of just how many babies and mothers used to die in childbirth.

batteries I think women are pushed towards avoiding medical intervention due to previous traumatic births.

I was given an unnecessary c section which quite frankly left me feeling invaded and attacked.

Not surprisingly next time I was not keen on medical intervention and was only prepared to continue with the pregnancy after a chat with the consultant who agreed not to push for a c section unless my life was at significant risk.

This rather suggests, though, that you haven't read enough about birth in places where there is no hospital system. It is much, much more frightening than the NHS.

You sound very naive. As if those two are the only options!

In Germany, there's the option to give birth with a midwife. (At least I think they haven't yet succeeded in outlawing it). Who will obviously call an ambulance IF, but only IF there is need for an emergency C-section or some other kind of intervention that needs a hospital.

And will not subject you to random men walking into the room and gawking at you while you give birth when it's a completely normal birth and the humiliation is not made up for by any benefits.

Now, I am a very stubborn person and will therefore likely not give birth at all when my country refuses to give me adequate conditions for it.

Has she really called her child Fox? I can only hope she plans to unschool too or the poor little mite will be a bully magnet.

As for the rest of her guff, she's deranged. Way too much potential for things to very wrong very quickly. If a fully staffed operating theatre hadn't been available in the next room when dc1 was born the outcome for me and him might have been very different.

Omg check out her latest instagram post....

I have a friend who has freebirthed 5 children and is very happy with it but personally I think it's a bit like russian roulette.
Die with number 5 and leave 4 motherless, she laughs at me but people used to die in childbirth all the time. I'd rather not.

She's very very POSITIVE. Sweet, really

But is this because it permits people to make choices that put their lives at risk? Is it because of preexisiting levels of poverty and obesity? Is it because of higher numbers of women from ethnicities with higher rates of complications

Could be any of those. But it certainly isn't because women aren't oppressed enough. Sweden and Finland aren't exactly known for exceptional misogyny.

And I know that Germany (as of 2010) allowed home births, births in "birth houses", and other such alternatives to hospitals, and while completely unassisted birth might be frowned upon, I never heard of a woman being punished for it. (How do you suggest that should be done, anyway? Are all women who don't get to the hospital in time to give birth must be locked up in prison for five years? Like those misogynist countries that punish all women who have miscarriages in case one of them intentionally aborted?)

Sweden had, at the time the data were gathered, 4 maternal deaths per 100 000 births, Germany 7, the UK whopping 12.

Whatever the solution might be, more misogyny clearly isn't the way forward.

Source:
www.laenderdaten.de/gesundheit/muettersterblichkeit.aspx

I get where she is coming from to an extent, the first midwife I seen at my 12wk scan was horrified when I said I didn't want the flu jab and told me I could end up in ICU.

Why do you think men walk in and out during your birth? I didn't see a single man in both of my births. From beginning to end and 4 years down the line.

If a man comes in to save your dying child than I'm all for it to be honest.

If a man comes in to save your dying child than I'm all for it to be honest

Yes it was a male obstetrician who rushed in to deliver my first when it was discovered the baby had the cord around its neck. In that sort of situation you don't cause a fuss and ask them to send a woman.

Male anaesthetist gave me my epidural after 12 hours of full-on agonising labour.

Wow a lot of awful comments!! And no I would never have a free birth!!!

I did decline the blood test for downs and other anomalies as I wouldn't terminate at all. I also didn't have the flu jab as it is possibly linked to an illness I had years ago, not everyone decline it for no reason.

My MIL was anti vax and homeschooled- both my children are vax and is going to school.

A homebirth is no where near the same as a free birth. Stop saying it is!!
I had 2 wonderful NHS midwives at my homebirth.

Yes I loved my births. I use Amber for my baby's teething, I also use medicine when it is needed.

We are normal family who made very informed choices, I would have attended hospital if mine or my babies life was in danger.

I've now read the article. The lady says the midwives came and left again, do they normally do that with a home birth? She makes it out like she was upset that they left again, but surely if that's what she wanted then they have done exactly what she was requesting.

Please could someone explain whether they left because of the free birth request or do they normally come and go?

A homebirth is no where near the same as a free birth. Stop saying it is!! I don't think people are saying that.

Midwives don't come and go at a home birth. Once in established labour they need to monitor the fh every 15 mins.....if the woman agrees to it.

So either they came and she wasn't in established labour, they left and she didn't call them back.

Or she called them, changed her mind and sent them away again.

"I did decline the blood test for downs and other anomalies as I wouldn't terminate at all."

I don't understand this - there are more outcomes to these tests than terminations. One of the key ones is having the support available during labour and after birth for your baby if they need urgent medical attention.

This may mean things like a scheduled c-section and a cot available in a cardio intensive care unit if needed.

Thank you Possum

Can someone please link to her instagram?