To have 3.5 year old ds in a buggy?

[MrsCobain]

I meet up with this group of Mum's about once a week. I always take ds (who's almost 3 and a half) in his jogging buggy.

I do this partly because walking is the only exercise I get (I kind of walk-jog) and partly as my car is a bit of a gas guzzling monster and I only use it when I absolutely have to.

It's 2 miles each way so 4 in total. Ds actually walks a large part of it but is usually knackered on the way back as he's walked most of the way there and played like a nutter for a couple of hours. It's also nap time, he normally falls asleep on the way home. He spends probably about 50-70% of his waking hours outside on the go, he's really active.

Anyway, I thought I'd seen some raised eyebrows at me coming in with a buggy before but today one of them made a really snippy little comment "so ridiculous he's still in a stroller" and all of the others (bar one) all jumped in and agreed that their kids the same age were never allowed in them anymore and were all sneery about kids being babied these days.

Aibu in thinking a, it's fine for ds to do part of the journey in a buggy and b, it's a bit bloody rich considering they all drive anyway?

My DS2 was in a buggy until he started school as I don't drive, he has 3 older siblings who went to school a mile from our house then another mile to nursery so 2 miles on way home from nursery not to mention popping to the shops/stopping at a friends on the way there/back. I used a buggy because of time constraints plus he would be shattered after nursery and it was also naptime. I always let him walk when time allowed and he wanted to. They're being dicks, tell them to mind their own or ignore it and let them be dickish...someone will tell them they're being dicks eventually.

Sorry, I said dicks 3 times in that...stressful week!

We have a Pyrenees mix and really limited her walking when she was young. We still do as she's a big dog and hip/leg issues are a huge problem. She gets all limpy and stiff after a couple of miles.

Id honestly never thought about it in relation to toddlers, maybe it's the same.

I'd reply

"Stop being such cunts. I want to do a bit of exercise and it's unlikely a 3.5 year old will walk for 4 miles"

This! And how the hell will he nap on a scooter?! My eldest was still napping at this age, he hung onto it for ages!

I've never understand these posts, of course it's easier to strap at child into a pushchair but I've never done it since mine were small.
My eldest stopped using a Pushchair at 15 months, and only went in at 3 more times until she was 2.
My youngest hasn't been in a pushchair since she was 17 months old.

They both hated being strapped down so we just walked everywhere, everything took and still takes a lot longer. Gone are the days of spending hours shopping, if we go out for the day then they walk. I'm sure that they do more than 4 miles a day just running around the house and garden.

Having said all that which is just my view on things I hardly ever see 2/3 year olds walking around they are nearly always in pushchairs and it just seems to be the norm.

YNBU to use the buggy. Ignore.
I put my dd(3)in a pushchair on the schoolruns because I need to get there in a decent time. it's 1.5miles each way so 6miles for both morning and afternoon which she can't manage all of. She also has some special needs but I'd still use the pushchair regardless for a long walk.

My DD is in the buggy to and from nursery (she just 3). It's 1.5!miles and as others have said we like to get there in less than an hour! She's a great walker but I think it's a bit far for little legs when she's just woken up or is tired after a long day.

I'd make him walk. In fact I don't think I even had a push chair at that age.

Bully for you. If you had my DGD you'd most definitely have a buggy.

They're not all the same.

sound like bitches.

I still use buggy for a very short walk 3 days per with DD - literally a few hundred meters and she is nearly 5 - the walk is a killer for me, she is so tricky so much easier to put her in buggy than have her winging and I have a bad back.

However on the other days, we do loads of walking - loads, its just in different places with far more going on!! She doesn't seem to mind that and is totally active at home. Honestly the annoying people we have to share a planet with

This is entirely their problem. What you are doing is healthy, sensible, green, and works for you.
They must have small lives and small mind to be so invested in what you do.

YANBU at all and they sound ridiculous since they drive to the flipping playgroup.

My DS is just slightly older than yours but we still use the buggy sometimes. Mainly for th 3pm school run because by then he's walked to nursery, played at nursery for 3 hours, walked back from nursery and then had a busy afternoon doing whatever. Anyone who judges me can do one.

The first time i read about buggy-judging on here was about a year ago. I was totally non-plussed by it. I can honestly say i have never in my life noticed the age of any child being pushed in a buggy by any one else and am amazed that anyone else does

DD4 is 3.3 and when i need to Not Dawdle she goes in her buggy. If i'm feeling a bit under the weather or the weather itself is shite and i don't want to spend ages in the wind and rain she'll go in her buggy. If we're going somewhere i know is going to be very crowded i'll take the buggy to put her in when things get stressy. When i've got a lot to carry i'll use the buggy with DD in it as a counter weight.

If folks are looking and judging - stuff 'em.

I'm afraid I probably would have judged. My 2 yr old (nearly 3) is too old (imo) to go in a buggy. When I'm walking back from nursery, we regularly walk past 3.5 and even 4 yr olds in prams/buggies and even he looks at amusement!

Kids are capable of walking longer distances that you think.

Be honest - you do it for you - because it's easier!

Fake - so would I.

Morethan Nap time?! FFS! He's 3.5!! Babies and small toddlers nap.

Probably done by the same people who keep their school age children in cots and cot beds.

I'm so relieved at the amount of people with older toddlers who still use buggies! I can't drive not from lack of trying and take 2.9yo DD EVERYWHERE in the buggy. I walk absolutely everywhere, she hasn't got the stamina to keep up and I don't have the patience to go everywhere at 2 year old speed! However I do feel very judged as everyone else around here seems to drive so I rarely see kids as old as her in a buggy.

It's a ball ache because she's heavy to push but like PP says, what are you meant to do if you have bags of shopping and need to catch a bus and your child suddenly decides they're done walking?!

Ignore them OP

Disney donna - as I said, he's outside and on the go most of his waking hours. I'm betting he walks/runs about 11 miles a day, he's never still. There's no want for exercise for this kid at all.

If I made him walk all 4 miles and he was in the mood to stop every two minutes and look at stuff or go in a different direction I'd have to leave at 7am to get there on time. I'd turn up pissed off and ready to go home.

I get this too, notably from someone who drives quite short distances. Assuming the weather is ok I walk a similar distance to you into town, do whatever shopping needs doing, and sling the heavy stuff under the buggy. 3.5yo DD walks part of it and hops into the buggy for a rest when needed, or if she has a snack. She also has to go in when the urge to bolt gets too great, so I don't have to just ditch the shopping and run after her! The threat of going in is often enough to deter her, but sometimes she will say "I don't think I can walk nicely in this shop mummy, I'll go in the buggy for a bit" .

I have no idea how to stop the comments, I wish I did! I am currently going with inward seething, and an outward smile and a cheery "oh well, the fresh air does us more good than being in the car".

If you tell them where to shove it, please do let us know, I'll be cheering you on

I thought of my pushchair as a massive handbag extension.
^^This too!!

StarUtopia - my eldest still napped probably 4 days a week at 3.5. He needed it. Daughter is totally different.

Sounds like your kid is being brought up to be as judgemental as you, smirking at others.

Star As I said many times now he walks MILES in a day. He rarely sits still. He NEEDS his naps. I don't know any 3.5 year old that doesn't still nap.

On the rare occasion he skips nap life is very unpleasant for everyone by 4pm.

And he's never slept in a cot.

Although I think when he wakes from his nap I'll tell him Santa isn't really and put drawing pins in his slippers to toughen the little snowflake up a little.

I had someone say to me the other day that my grandson (3 1/2) is too big for s pushchair. Bollocks. He fits in, he likes it and it's bloody handy for putting shopping on. I walk at speed so it suits me, thanks very much! He usually walks home depending on what time I've got but if I'm in a hurry he's in the pushchair.
Whisper it quietly, but when my girls were younger and we went on holiday with my parents we used to take the two fold up strollers as they were handy for my mum to lean on and push along the sea front ( and also carry her f*ing huge handbag on it. My girls sometimes got in for a ride WHEN THEY WERE 9!

Gosh yes, DS was in the buggy sometimes until he started school. Another saying that you only ever get judged by people who drive everywhere.

once they start school they only have to walk half the distance, and suddenly it's easy.

I had my 4 year old in the buggy today for the school run. She fell asleep in the afternoon because nursery exhausts her. I was not about to wake her up and immediately make her walk to school. So she went in the buggy.

People can judge me all they want. At the same age her older sibling would have been stood on the buggy board but that would have been seen as ok. What's the difference? Neither are walking.

And scooters are useless if your child does not like scooters. Neither of mine were the slightest bit interested. My eldest would have preferred to walk.

Oh and for anyone now judging me too - DD also hops in and out of the buggy depending on how far she's walked and how tired she is. I only absolutely make her go in it if we're rushing to catch a bus every fucking morning

For those that would judge please remember you don't know what your judging.

It could be like the OP where they walk miles and the child isn't quite ready for that yet - perfectly normal at 3.5

It could also be that the child has a disability/developmental delay which mean they aren't ready, or never will be, to walk distances.

Every child is different so "but my 2 year old can run a marathon" really isn't relevant!

Nap time?! FFS! He's 3.5!! Babies and small toddlers nap.

That's just brilliant. Judging a 3 year old for napping.

Do we still have comment of the week?