Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do you cater for everyone at family events?

121 replies

OnTheUp13 · 23/04/2017 20:49

Just come home from a family get together. It was a relatives birthday if that makes any difference. We all live local to each other and see each other every other weekend either at each other's houses or we meet up and take the kids to country parks/swimming whatever.

So there's 9 adults and 5 kids. Same people as usual.

We get there today and when food is put out there's nothing I can eat. I'm a vegetarian and have been for 15ish years. I'm not an ethical veggie nor do I worry about meat being near veggie food, I eat quorn etc. When they all come to my house I cook meat etc my DH & DD arent veggie

So AIBU to expect there to be something I can eat? As whenever we go to their house there's nothing I can eat.

OP posts:
befuddledgardener · 23/04/2017 21:26

It's so utterly rude!

Can you nip out to the shop next time and get yourself some veggie sausages. Or ask DH to nip out and rustle something up on your behalf. You can try and be discreet but I bet they will notice. You can just explain that you were starving and couldn't wait until you're back home.

Also stop cooking the hosts favourites. In fact actively provide things the horrid host can't or won't eat.

Original poster
OnTheUp13 · 23/04/2017 21:27

Ok Emily I don't eat meat.

Please replace the word vegetarian with the phrase I don't eat meat throughout the entire thread.

OP posts:
Iamastonished · 23/04/2017 21:27

Next time I wouldn't offer to bring something. I would just take something anyway, and if she says anything just point out that you weren't catered for the previous time.

Original poster
OnTheUp13 · 23/04/2017 21:29

Befuddled I think I'll start making a big show of brining something each time we're at there's now.

OP posts:
highinthesky · 23/04/2017 21:29

Next time it's your turn to cater, serve all-veggie food. The penny might just drop.

befuddledgardener · 23/04/2017 21:30

The lardie potatoes are irrelevant. Not eating meat might be down to texture

Original poster
OnTheUp13 · 23/04/2017 21:30

I don't think they'd have a problem even if I didn't serve meat when they came. I just realise that not everyone doesn't want to eat meat.

Unless of course it's an allergy. I'm not saying that not eating meat is akin to an allergy.

OP posts:
228agreenend · 23/04/2017 21:32

I could cater for mainstream food requirements such as vegetarian, and if I knew there was a coeliac, I would buy in some gluten-free food.

ItsCakeTime · 23/04/2017 21:33

That's just rude!!!

In our family we run the gauntlet from meat & potato to (religious) vegan and allergies.

I'll admit that I buy in the vegan stuff, allergies, some are easier than others to cater for. The difficult ones I ask them to help.

But buffet style meal, piss easy to cater for a veggie.

befuddledgardener · 23/04/2017 21:33

Or next time just being nothing but a complete platter of food four yourself.

Original poster
OnTheUp13 · 23/04/2017 21:34

I'm really not asking anyone to make anything from scratch it's just we're a bunch of cooks and enjoy it. I'd be happy with a microwave meal sans meat

OP posts:
Original poster
OnTheUp13 · 23/04/2017 21:35

Befuddled yes! Take my own knife, fork etc 😏

OP posts:
Inertia · 23/04/2017 21:36

Next time you go, turn up with chips, or a delicious takeaway veggie curry, and eat that while everyone else eats their ham roll or whatever it is. Try to come up with a more ostentatious meal each time you go.

Your relative is rude.

FurryLittleTwerp · 23/04/2017 21:36

If veggie food had been provided, you can bet your bottom dollar that most of the carnivores would have been stuffing themselves with it eating it as well as the meat.

Original poster
OnTheUp13 · 23/04/2017 21:37

Itcaketime what religion is vegan? I might convert to really piss her off Wink

OP posts:
SparklesandBangs · 23/04/2017 21:38

On please come to mine next time the will be a non meat choice. When I'm preparing a meal for the extended family we always think about who will be coming. We have to cater for a lactose intolerant DC and one who is allergic to nuts/eggs. An elderly person who likes fish and chicken. Plus other fussy eaters.

We try for a meal for all with 1 variation, last week I tried really hard and had a lasagne with spag bol (would have been made with quorn if you were coming) as the the alternative. All going well until DS decided she didn't eat either, still haven't worked out why as I am sure she has before. Anyway I did tell her that I wasn't catering for her and she brought her own pizza.

Original poster
OnTheUp13 · 23/04/2017 21:38

Inertia maybe rock up with a 3 course meat free meal in tuppawear

OP posts:
Original poster
OnTheUp13 · 23/04/2017 21:39

SparklesandBangs tell me where and when. I'll make the cake 🎂 another firm fave is pecan and maple bundt cake.

OP posts:
whomovedmychocolate · 23/04/2017 21:39

Next time, perhaps get Dominos to deliver you a pizza Wink

JaneEyre70 · 23/04/2017 21:43

It's rude, plain and simple. I'd take my own now to every event to make a point! And don't serve them meat in future so they really get the message.

WinBigly · 23/04/2017 21:48

If veggie food had been provided, you can bet your bottom dollar that most of the carnivores would have been stuffing themselves with it eating it as well as the meat.

So true Furry

A couple of years ago I went to a 50th birthday party which was being catered by a local Indian restaurant. I was the only vegetarian there yet by the time I reached the buffet there were only a few crumbs of veggie food left. Greedy shites.

Alexandra87 · 23/04/2017 21:51

We would always cater for everyone. We have a veggie, a food allergy sufferer, people doing slimming world and just generally fussy eaters. There's always something for everyone. Can't believe your own family would treat you like that.

justanillusion · 23/04/2017 21:52

Spinach and feta samosas sound delicious.

MrsTwix · 23/04/2017 21:53

In that case she is very rude. I'd be embarrassed if I forgot and rush to get you something.

highinthesky · 23/04/2017 21:53

A couple of years ago I went to a 50th birthday party which was being catered by a local Indian restaurant. I was the only vegetarian there yet by the time I reached the buffet there were only a few crumbs of veggie food left. Greedy shites.

This is standard thoughtless guest behaviour, and probably compounded by free flowing alcohol. The answer is for the host to publicly ask vegetarians to visit the buffet table first.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.