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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

To think post natal wards are absolute shit?

328 replies

SprogletsMum · 12/04/2017 17:43

I had ds2 this morning and have been put onto a full 4 bay ward.

2 of the 3 other women have been quiet most of the day but one keeps ringing people all day long. There has not been a single minute of quiet all day.
I've been awake since 1am and I'm shattered but she just won't shut up.
I'm going home to the other 3 dc for some peace and quiet as soon as ds2s 12 hours of obs are up.

OP posts:
ShelaghTurner · 12/04/2017 19:37

Congratulations btw OP Flowers

Elendon · 12/04/2017 19:39

Yes, the lady and 20 of her family having a curry in the next bay wasn't a highlight, So not necessary.

My 'highlight' was the man with his three children, they were all white, who stayed for an hour at 8am and then left for work. His wife, who had just given birth, had to look after them for the rest of the day.

Thankfully I wasn't on that ward and in a private room. But I couldn't believe my eyes!

SharkBastard · 12/04/2017 19:47

I feel very sad for the staff...it's a shit place to be both as patient and staff I imagine. It's the idea that you're to rest in the place, just not possible!

expatinscotland · 12/04/2017 19:47

'Why are they so bloody hot? '

Too many fucking people in them.

talulahbelle · 12/04/2017 19:52

Threads like these made me request a private room following my daughter's birth, and I'm going to do it again. £145 per night for a basic en-suite for two nights. £££ but sleep is priceless.

namechangedtoday15 · 12/04/2017 19:53

elendon yep, I'd not been able to stomach strong flavours all pregnancy so the combination of that and a pretty rowdy bunch wasn't ideal. But I think your highlight wins hands down! Confused

ineedwine99 · 12/04/2017 19:55

It's a shame it's like that for so many of you, for me the heat was a pain but that was all. Lovely midwives, other women quiet and all kept curtains pulled round but lovely when we saw each other, bed comfy, food not bad.

Tiptoethr0ughthetulips · 12/04/2017 19:56

YANBU. I had various issues in labour and a trip to theatre for repair afterwards, yet it is the post natal ward that upset me the most. I'm pregnant now and am praying that all is straight forward enough for me to go home ASAP. The actual midwives were fairly decent but you hardly get to see them and the HCA's in the most part did not seem to give a shit. I was hot, in pain, frightened, vulnerable and catheterised. Couldn't manage to get to breakfast which was self service, had concerns about another person in my bay.

RoboticSealpup · 12/04/2017 19:57

YANBU. Giving birth was horrible, bit this wasn't far behind. After one night, I told the nurses "I'm going home tomorrow". They tried to tell me they might want to keep me another night but I just said "we're not sick, we're going home." After the most tumultuous experience of my life, I'm expected to stay in a room with five other women, without any help or emotional support from DH (who was sent home), with a newborn DD who only slept if I held her (so no sleep for me at all)??? And the nurses are too busy to help you with anything, you're on your own! No thanks. Makes me angry just thinking about it.

Tiptoethr0ughthetulips · 12/04/2017 19:57

Posted too soon, I could go on and on. My Midwife even told me she discharged herself from the same ward.

FrankensteinsSister · 12/04/2017 20:04

I was in for 7 days and I had/ have ptsd from how I was treated. It was the worst week of my life. I have never, never been as anxious and terrified, and I have severe anxiety so I'm used to the feeling.

kittytom · 12/04/2017 20:06

YANBU. I also think my horrible, inexplicably hostile experience in the postnatal ward contributed to my PND with DD1. That and the three days of zero sleep. Seven years on I still thinking of writing to let them know this as it still bugs me how I was treated there.

My experience with DS (in a different place and one of the big One Born Every Minute hospitals) was much better I have to say.

koalab · 12/04/2017 20:08

Congratulations! I was in 11 days. On day 10 I cried for about 3 hours when they said I wouldn't be going home that day. The birth was far from easy but it's the prospect of having to stay on a ward again that puts me off doing it again. I will seriously be thinking about travelling further to a hospital with private rooms next time and I will happily pay for it. I'm sure my blood pressure would have reduced much quicker and I wouldn't have needed to stay in for so long if I had a nice calm room.

Also that first night when my partner was sent home and I was left with a baby that wouldn't latch not having a clue what to do was the most stressed I've ever felt. Those 11 days I got so little sleep, if my baby wasn't crying another one was.

I'm getting emotional just thinking back to it to be honest.

toffeeboffin · 12/04/2017 20:10

These are terrible.

Is there an option to pay for a private room? Or is that only with private health insurance?

Just thinking as we live abroad, we paid £200 to have a private room with bathroom. Had a section and TBH it was worth every bloody penny.

Instasista · 12/04/2017 20:10

They are awful. I left by lying about passing wind

toffeeboffin · 12/04/2017 20:10

Sorry, had two nights, so it was £100 per night.

Instasista · 12/04/2017 20:11

You can pay for private room in my hospital and it's only about £70 but we were too traumatised and shocked to ask, and had been moved so many times DH refused to move again

Teabagtits · 12/04/2017 20:18

I'm in Scotland but I had a similar experience to many described above. My notes had said for health reasons I needed a single room but I was put on a ward with 5others after a 48hour labour and eventual emcs. Being autistic I couldn't cope with the sensory overload of noise, heat, strip lighting and endless visitors and entitled fathers shouting all the time - but they insisted I kept my curtains open despite even the perinatal psychiatry team speaking to them about it. I didn't get ill but I became very stressed and anxious and the midwives didn't care because they were too busy. I'm dreading having this baby in case my hospital experience is the same.

I won't even try to describe how repulsive the so called food was!

BringOnTheScience · 12/04/2017 20:19

I was stuck on post-natal wards when in BEFORE I had each of mine. I had pre eclampsia both times. Being kept awake by all the babies and visitors etc when I was waiting to have mine prematurely ... midwives couldn't understand why I asked several times a day whether there was a bed on the antenatal wards yet.

Peak moment was being woken up by a midwife demanding to know when I'd last fed my baby. Apparently "I'm 29 weeks pregnant you thoughtless bitch. Go and read my fucking notes!" wasn't the response she was expecting.

AngelBlue12 · 12/04/2017 20:22

Our hospital is lovely, makes me sad that so many have had a bad time :(

silkpyjamasallday · 12/04/2017 20:23

I had dd at 11pm and left the next day, I discharged myself which they weren't happy about but it was 27 degrees Celsius and no one would respond to me pressing the buzzer so I got no paracetamol. On a bay of 8 with my bed under the machine that made the noises for the buzzers which went off constantly all night. Was so nice to get home and sleep!

FanaticalFox · 12/04/2017 20:31

can you pay for a private room in a normal NHS hospital after the birth through choice? I would so do that! How do you go about it?! Worth every penny by the sounds of it. Going to ask my midwife tomorrow.

LotisBlue · 12/04/2017 20:33

Yanbu at all, it was easily the worst part of Dc1's birth and the main reason Dc2 was a home birth.

Congratulations Flowers

Instasista · 12/04/2017 20:36

Fanatical it's no problem but usually you have to wait for the day to ask if there is one free as most hospitals don't pre book. It's not particularly nice or anything but is your own room

ShelaghTurner · 12/04/2017 20:38

I paid £175 a night for 3 nights with dd1 and it was just as bad in its own way. Yes I could open a window and had my own bathroom and peace and quiet. But I was totally abandoned, no one came. I couldn't leave the bed, couldn't feed her and when I rang the bell no one came for two hours and dd1 was starving and screaming the whole time. I hated that too.