To ask for genuine, real birth stories!?

[FunkyChunkyCherub]

First baby due in 3 months - I'm not scared of labour at all (maybe I should be ) but I feel like everyone I know has painted an unrealistic picture for me! I've either had a vague 'it was hell but worth it for my little bundle of joy' or 'I quite liked the experience, it was empowering and real I love what a woman's body can do' etc. All very lovely but I want details!

How long did it last? How painful? What drugs (if any)? Did you shit yourself?! I need some answers!!

40+5, woke at 3am with lower back pain and weeing constantly. After 20 minutes of back and forth as well pacing the bedroom floor, I threw up the entire contents of my stomach and then emptied my bowels. Contractions start almost immediately and I'm asked to come in to the birthing unit.

4:30am Was recommended a bath - cried during that as I couldn't get comfortable. Gas and air provided - cried during that because it made me feel sick.

6:30am I asked for pethidine. Midwife reluctant as I was only 6cm dilated. I cried so she relented (theme here somewhere..)

6:50 I feel the need to push (at this point my waters came out so I cried again thinking I'd wet myself) and at 7:28 DS was born.

2 babies, both born in water, both were born almost exactly 24 hours after the first very mild but absolutely unmistakable contraction.

Here's the thing: some people don't have to push. I pushed my first baby out and tore; I didn't push my second baby out (because the midwife was shouting "Don't push! Don't push!") and she was born anyway. Your body will push and sometimes that is enough.

I shouted my head off but it was bloody brilliant

DD1 - Waters broke on due date, started around 11pm in bed thought I'd wet myself, a couple of hours later another gush, another couple of hours later a huge flood! Phoned hospital first thing in the morning and went in for a check up, waters gone, waited for contractions, nothing happened, went back to hospital in the evening, wanted to keep me in as it had been 24 hours since waters broke but I refused and went home. Contractions started around midnight and were immediately lasting for 30 seconds and coming every 45 seconds!! Barely had time to catch my breath in-between. Called hospital and went in at 4am. All contractions stopped (of course!) Hospital insisted I had to choose either induction or section as waters had broken 36 hours earlier and nothing was happening. I chose induction. After being hooked up to the drip nothing happened so I fell asleep....then BAM! woke up 3 hours later with contractions coming thick and fast and pain was excruciating. Four hours of back to back labour followed with me gripping that gas and air like I couldn't breathe without it. I remember saying I can't do this anymore and then midwife checked and babys' head was there, so suddenly I had two midwives telling me to push. Baby then became distressed and her heart rate dropped so I had an episiotomy to get her out quickly. I don't know how many stitches I had but I would say quite a few...

• realised on Monday that body felt suddenly different (stuffy nose cleared etc), had a bright red 'show'
• Wednesday 4pm started feeling a bit odd, hungry then queasy, restless etc. Tried to eat, puked.
• Wednesday 7pm suddenly contractions start and bam I am instantly dilated, first stage of labour is over without noticing it much. Midwife arrives.
• THREE hours pushing. Painful but not enough to ask for pain relief. I remember thinking a contraction is a bit like being punched in the stomach at the same time as being smacked over the head. If my lower back was in the warm birth pool it was much less painful than if I stood up out of water: plan your pain relief. Yes lots of pooing.
• baby's head finally appears, anxious midwife yanks rest of him out. Baby is fine, looks tired and puzzled. Midwife dithers then lies on paperwork to say second stage was 90 mins.
• much pointless weighing and hassling of baby, regret allowing this.
• placenta still hasn't come out after an hour so midwife gives me an injection and yanks it out so hard she falls over. This appears to have caused womb scarring which is probably why I haven't been able to have more children.
• third degree tear (ie anus) so transferred to hospital for stitches. Wait for 6 hrs or so. Get stiches. Wait another 6 hrs for antibiotics. Head home.

So all in all a drug free vaginal home birth but the placenta stage was much more important than I realised, wish I hadn't let midwife pull but she told me that was normal... And tears suck.

• bleed for 10 weeks.

The womb scarring is only just now coming to light 4 years on, my symptoms should have been recognised at the 6 week check and if not then certainly when I complained a year later, but I was told by GP it was probably a bladder problem or psychological! I suppose I am saying to take responsibility for your health as much as you can, experts make mistakes.

3 days of occasional contractions, awoken at 11pm with HUGE contractions (and feeling v constipated) 3am i was 8cm and the contractions weren't stopping. Jumped in a birthing pool and ahhhhh bliss. 6.33am he was born. No pain relief apart from the birthing pool.

Everyone deals with the pain so differently. Some are fine, some need everything. You don't know until you get to that point.

But fcuk me, i tore, and I will never forget that pain!

And i did the biggest poo i think ive ever done.

And i would happily do it all over again.

Trust your body. You are stronger than you think!

Ah I love this!!
I had my daughter at 40+5. I went to sleep with very dull ache, in tummy almost like the pain you get in your legs if you walk too far. I woke up with what felt like period pains a few hours later.

I woke up DDs dad who then woke my mum for me, I spewed over the living room then went to hospital. They checked me and sent me home "it'll be days they said!"

An hour later I went back to the hospital. Still only 2can dilated they said!
You'll be days! But here's some gas and air- amazing stuff, i had a v weird reaction, I believed Bob Marley was in my room! Crazy I know!
The gas and air makes your throat SO dry!
The pain was quite bad, but for me, it wasn't the screaming swearing type.
I asked for other painkillers, asked for morphine as I'd previously had it without any bad effects. They gave me pethadine which made me sick once I had given birth to DD.
The midwife had to break my waters when I was 4cm
They checked me and said I was 6cm.
Very shortly afterwards I felt a feeling like I really really needed a poo, but from the wrong area. Midwife says DO NOT PUSH! YOU ARE NOT READY! Well I pushed. I had to!
14 minutes later DD was born. My established labour was 4:14. 7lb 2oz. No stitches or poo!

Just enjoy the gas and air. It was amazing stuff!

Also, crayzeeee pain in the top of my legs during contractions. Like I'd been cycling for hours - hot burning pain. I'd forgotten that!

Ds - 2 weeks early, had backache that came and went for 4 days. Saw the midwife at 11am for checkup. Head 3/5 engaged, see you next week. Waters dribbled in Asda at 5pm. Went home, bowels cleared out and had a show. Rang the hospital and was told to come in for a check up. Arrived at the hospital just after 7pm to discover I was fully dilated and told to push! I had a TENS machine that was more of a distraction than a help. It was too late for any other pain relief. He arrived at 9.20 after an epesiotomy. Like Nuala88 I thought I was going to poo myself so held back on pushing.

DD - carried her the same as Ds until she fully engaged at 36 weeks. Then decided to stay put. 4 days overdue and I had contractons every 3 minutes but no pain. Told to go to hospital as first delivery was fast. When I arrived I was only 2cm dilated. They were going to send me home but lost her heartbeat for a minute. Decided to break my waters at midnight. I had gas and air as contractions were painful. It made me sleepy (or maybe the being up at 5am with a 2 year old the previous morning hadnt helped). I remember lying on my side and coming around to see a crowd around the bed and a doctor saying to take me to theatre for a c-section as the heartbeat had dropped again. As they rolled me onto my back the baby crowned and was born at 6.15am. I was 6cm dilated and had no stitches.

Overall the pain was bearable, as others have said the worst is when the baby crowns but that is the end. The 2nd was worse as I knew what to expect, ignorance is bliss with your first.

DS1 born at 36 weeks. Waters broke in night with no warning at 35+6. Admitted to hospital for examination, then sent home for 24 hours as no beds in special care baby unit and 36 weeks is cut off for premature.

Went in again next day and induced. Took all day to work, went into strong labour very quickly at about 6.30pm and DS was born at 11.40pm. Hurt like hell but midwife kept saying 'oh it won't be long now' and 'you're having a storming labour' when I was yelling for an epidural. Tried gas but it made me feel suffocated so did it with Tens machine and a lot of yelling! Tear which needed stitches but not too bad and healed quickly.

DS2 born 16 months later, 10 days early. Felt what I thought were Braxton Hicks the evening before when at dinner at friends' house. They were coming regularly but when I mentioned it to friend she said 'does it hurt?' and when I said no, replied 'well you're not in labour then! Have another glass of wine'.

Went home at 10, woke up at 4 with definite contractions but still not that painful. Rang hospital as I was worried they would have no beds
( huge shortage at the time) apologising for only being in early labour and they laughed and said 'no we're not busy, come in and we'll examine you'. Waters broke in car park, went up to ward, got examined and midwife said ' Yep 10 cms and ready to go'. It was like a comedy sketch - DH and I just looked at each other and our mouths dropped open. Midwife went off to change into scrubs, I felt head coming, DH rushed off to drag midwife back and DS2 was born 45 mins after arriving at hospital. Midwife said ' I'll tell you now, that was the first baby I've ever delivered on my own'.
Best bit was ringing friends and saying 'thanks for dinner last night and by the way, we've had the baby' 😁😁.

Not mine, but here's some of my perspective on DP's, in case that's useful too. Bottom line: think about what you will do if they totally ignore your partner/ he isn't able to be there and advocate for you.

readingmedievalbooks.wordpress.com/2017/03/30/my-daughters-birth/

Elective C-Section here, because I didn't like the idea of labour. Absolute bliss, was an amazing experience, was home within 2 days, a few days of mild discomfort and I was right as rain b about day 5. Would highly recommend but that is a very controversial view on mumsnet

You have tones of stories her already but ..
First 36 hrs in established labour. At home 12 days over, gave birth standing over pool.. it burned..
second 10 hours established labour Ina birthing centre.. birth in a pool, baby born in sack.. both were hard.. used gas,

It's pain like no other (although I don't mean that necessarily in a bad way). Prepare yourself, be realistic, nothing lasts forever and nature won't give you any more pain than you can bear - or you'd pass out.

2.15am - woke up halfway out of bed because my waters broke. Called the maternity unit and they said to head down to hospital around 5am - told not to take anything as it's just a check then I'll be sent home 😒

5.30 - walked to hospital (10 mins). Was having very mild contractions until i got there and then they started kicking in a bit more. Moved up to the maternity ward to be examined - 4cm already. They decided to keep me on the ward as it would be ages apparently... given gas and air but the midwife was telling me to breathe in through my nose and out through my nose and then shouting at me for not doing it properly so she took it from me! Wasn't in a position to complain at this point as the pain was indescribable. They then decided to give me a sweep - something I now realise was a ridiculous thing to do to someone who is already in labour and for only a short time. The most horrific pain of the whole thing, I can still remember it now.

7am - pain. A lot of pain. In amongst throwing up. At some point I told my partner to press the alarm for the nurse because my body was pushing so I knew I was ready. They came in telling me to stop being stupid, I wasn't ready to push etc. They then proceeded to faff about for a short time until someone examined me and immediately announced I needed to be in the birthing suite because the baby was coming - no shit. In the lift they were worried that was going to be her place of birth. Shoved into a birthing room with every light blaring on and a ton of people. It was very very stressful for me as it had happened so quickly and I felt like it had been rushed due to the sweep and they weren't allowing me pain relief. Not long into the pushing they called for a doctor as it became clear my baby was distressed from a rushed labour and so it ended in a forceps delivery at 8.45am. Episiotomy and stitches - they gave me pain relief for that finally.

Oh and she was 37+1 so a little early.

1st - Back to back baby born at 39wks. Hind waters went 20 hours before front popped like a water balloon. I started to have proper, contractions straight after. Within 4 hours the pain was too much for me and I went in to hospital. Everything eased off a little by the time I got there which slowed things down and got me coping with the pain better. Water pool helped immensely as did g&a. Had an assisted delivery in theatre after baby got stuck. Pain wise, it was very strong and constant out of the water, however I still mostly felt in control and not scared. Did poo. The pressure was too much at the end and I couldn't not. Had to have an episiotomy and recovered badly from that - stitch and scar issues. However I felt very positive from the experience.

2nd - Born in sack (bursting as head came out). Pain sharper, with proper peaks but less strong than first labour. Kept expecting pain to get worse, and was in denial it was happening until I felt the urge to push. Labour was around 8hrs from plug going. No pain relief except delivering in the pool until I had to have a few stitches post labour as I tore along my old scar (which we were expecting to happen). Was showered and having guests within an hour of delivery. No problems recovering from birth.

Should say as well the first labour the contractions felt like burning and tightening, with no real defined middle to the contraction. Pain in tailbone and spread round.

Are you sure you want to hear all these stories!? The good news is that years later it's a distant memory and i'm so glad I did it for my amazing children.
My first child was a back to back labour. My contractions came on full blown with none of those gentle starting ones I'd heard about. They were every three minutes and agony and I threw up every single time. My labour was 25 hours and I threw up with every contraction for most of that. At some point they gave me an enema so I didn't ever poo myself. I tried the birthing pool but it was tricky as I was vomiting. Gas and air made me more sick. Pethadine helped a little. Then they discovered an undiagnosed cervical condition so gave me an epidural as they had to investigate. The epidural really helped in that last hour. I was rushed to theatre - the last resort was a section (and I wish now that I'd had one) but there was an older consultant in the hospital that night who had been trained in keillands forceps (dreadful things - I wouldn't let them use them on me now that I know the risks) so my baby was delivered with keillands in theatre. Baby was fine (facial scar to this day but fine!). I was ripped a lot and hemorrhaged badly. I was in hospital for nearly 2 weeks. I had blood transfusions and then a week later haemorrhaged again so was back in theatre for a D&c under general anaesthetic. My recovery was 7 weeks.
My second child was a planned c-section and it was fantastic! So calm and lovely. I had such s good time! I did hemorrage again afterwards but it was manageable. My recovery from the section was only 2 weeks!

Ooh boiing's post has just reminded me, I had a horrific cold in the days leading up to it. I felt so crap that I was worried I wouldn't have enough energy to push. On the day I went into labour, when I woke up that morning it had gone and didn't return until about 3 days later!

I honestly didn't think it was that bad until the last hour or so, and by that point the pethadine had kicked in so I didn't feel like it was happening to me!
Had first contraction about 4am.. I thought it was just the Braxton hicks at first (if you have had them to me that's all real contractions feel like really just stronger and more regular) woke me OH up about 6am where I had a bath and rang labour ward. I slept a bit and stayed in bed until about 1pm, then literally laid in the bath for 4 hours! It's painful but it's a pain that gives you warning it's coming, only last a couple of minutes, then fades away althogether and you feel fine inbetween!! And honestly I am terrible with pain I have such a low pain threshold, I have a huge vomit phobia and refused to eat all day in case I was sick! I didn't feel sick once by the way.
I went to hospital about 7pm and was 2cm. Went to midwife unit and just bounced on the ball, had another bath, watched a bit of tv.. then had pethadine and midwife told us to get some sleep. This was about 1am and that's when the pain ramped up. It was like a severe cramping in my back - mum rubbing my back helped. So we got the midwife back in who examined and I was 8cm. This is when I remember the pain being severe and constant.. I remember screaming but then at the same time I was trying to sleep between the contractions even at this point haha!? I then remember feeling a burning and decided I wanted to get in the pool - I had only been in 2 mins when they realised the baby's heatrate was dropping so I got kicked out of the pool much to my annoyance (at this point I called the lovely midwife bossy haha) and got rushed to the delivery suite to have the ventouse. The pushing stage to me was a relief and didn't hurt, it's just like pushing for a big poo. It's tiring like hard work and they keep saying to you "keep going, keep going!" And you're like argh give me a break I've run out of breath ha! I was pushing for 45 mins with the help of the ventouse. The worst bit was I was given water through a straw and it went down the wrong way and I couldn't concentrate on pushing cos I was choking hahaha!! I was really mad no1 seemed concerned about my choking situation!! Apparently I did poo hahaha but I didn't even know until my OH and mum told me lol but I don't care I always said I didn't care if I pooed all over as long as I wasn't sick! Literally I didn't have a clue I thought I hadn't.
I had 2nd degree tear and stitches.. fine I didn't feel a thing I was chatting to the doctor about when could I go home while she was doing it really casually lol!!
Gas and air is brilliant! I want some at home lol! I bled after for ages but it was fine and I was a bit sore but nothing excruciating and my first time going to toilet felt weird but was fine and nothing as painful as people had told me!
I would do labour all over again in a heartbeat if I knew it would be like my last labour.. I kind of see it like it was a "good" night ha! Maybe that's the gas and air!

Ds - first pangs of contractions late on a Friday night. They gradually got stronger and I (eventually) gave birth without intervention (loads of gas and air though which is lovely!) on the Sunday evening. To be honest, the worst thing for me was tiredness due to lack of sleep. The contractions weren't agonising early on but they were enough to stop me sleeping. I burst into tears at one point on Sunday morning purely through no sleep and because I was worried I wouldn't have the energy to push him out! I had no idea how much longer labour would continue and I found that hard. By the time the contractions were agonising and I considered asking for epidural it was during transition, it was nearly over, and too late for an epidural anyway. For me, the strongest contractions were worse than the crowning. That stage doesn't last long at all so you know you're nearly there and will soon be holding your baby. No moments of worry about ds, all went smoothly, examinations weren't painful, gave birth with my head in a beanbag! Straightforward but long latent phase.

Dd - had a strange feeling about 5am when I woke with a weird but fleeting cramp in my tummy. Went back to sleep and when I woke again at 7.30 I felt a trickle. Continued to trickle over a few hours - no big gush of waters breaking. Contractions very quickly escalated, arrived at hospital and they tried to make me queue. Dh intervened and told them if nobody saw me quickly I'd birth right there in the corridor. Dd arrived 30 mins later! The examination was very painful and I hated lying on my back for it - by then of course I was close to needing to push. Turned out that dd didn't like the forced position either as her heart rate dropped. Mw told me if it didn't pick up quickly I'd need an emergency cs. I got up and changed position, dd's heart rate picked up and she was born quickly with me on all fours again - no time for pain relief at all. From waters going to birth was just 7 hours.

Both labours very different - the first was long and arduous but not especially painful. The second was short but painful and quite worrying due largely to lack of pain relief, the late examination, being made to wait in triage and dd's heart rate dropping. Ultimately though I enjoyed the experiences, which I know sounds weird but true. Worth bearing in mind that you get respite between contractions and by the time crowning happens it's a different pain, which is weirdly quite a relief. I had an 8 pounder and a 9 pounder too so it wasn't because they were small!

With the first one, I didn't really have many preconceived ideas. I wrote a bit of a birth plan: no drugs, no episiotomy, no stitches, but I figured it would be 1 day out of the rest of my life, and I could handle it. I'd had a shitty pregnancy, and I reckoned birth would be a breeze after high blood pressure, oligohydramnios and obstetric cholestasis.

I went into labour 2 weeks early, and had no idea I was even in labour. As I was having a planned homebirth, I called the midwife. She came at 4am, made me a cuppa and some toast, gave me some paracetamol, sent my husband to work, and told me she would come back and check on me that afternoon. By 8am, I called my husband's boss to ask him to send him home, as the pain was starting to bug me and I kept vomiting. By 10am, I was screaming the house down, so my husband called the midwife back. She arrived at 10.15 with the gas and air (thank god) and the baby arrived half an hour later. I was in shock, as I'd expected to go overdue, and I hadn't imagined it would all be so quick.

Second baby, another planned home birth. I started contracting on Tuesday, she was born on Thursday. It was a back labour, very drawn out and boring. I think the midwives came round about 5pm on their evening rounds and decided to stay. I made full use of the gas and air this time! She was born about 2am with her hand by her face, so I tore pretty badly. I refused stitches, the midwife said I had one hour to stop bleeding or they would take me in. I sat with my legs firmly crossed!

My waters didn't break either time. With the first, they were broken about 15 minutes before, with the second they broke as she came out.

I had two textbook "easy births". They both hurt like hell though. It has been a good pain measure ever since though. If I say to a medical professional "it hurts worse than my unmediated homebirth" they know I'm in agony!

I had my boy at 5am btw. So only 4 hours I suppose of the pain being bad but it felt like maybe an hour and a half at the most!

Labour was 25 hours from very first contraction to him being born.. it was a long day for OH and mum lol but I thought it went quick!

#1: in and out of hospital in slow back to back labour with waters trickling from Saturday to Monday. Eventually admitted when baby had pooped inside me. Immediately given an epidural when they realised the position of the baby. 9lb 2oz baby was born just after midnight on Tuesday morning after 2 hours of pushing and a ventouse delivery. I had an episiotomy.

#2: 24 hours of labour. A shot of pethidine (vile stuff I wouldn't recommend it) an epidural and a 'precautionary' episiotomy.

#3: induction with the pessary. 2 doses 6 hours apart. 2nd dose hit the money and she was born in 3 hours. It came as a shock, there's no gradual build up to the contractions, it was very full on. (Might have shit myself too)

#4: woke early morning with contractions, leisurely labour all day, lay on the floor a bit, walked a bit, got to the hospital at 8cm still laughing and joking. Waters broken by the midwife at 11pm and baby born just before 1am with a bit of has and air.

#5: planned a home birth with the birth pool. Labour stalled at 4cm so went to the hospital and had the drip. Baby back to back and trying to come out ear first. Refused pain relief except gas and air because i was determined i was going home the same day. 10 hours of labour and an episiotomy, 10lb 5oz dd was born at 2pm. 6 hour discharge, back in my own bed that night.

#6: planned c section at 39 weeks after a host of problems and a breech baby. A scan the morning of revealed the bugger had turned but we went ahead anyway. Very odd kind of out of body experience but so calm. 4 days in hospital due to an infection marker in my bloods but otherwise fine. Felt fully recovered within a week but continued to rest for a second week. Back doing the school run by week 3. Now 6 weeks post op.

Sorry I keep adding things! My waters didn't break either. The midwife did it when I was about 8cm. Apparently she did it with a huge knitting needle but I thought she had done it with her fingers lol! I remember thing "ok my waters have broke there is no going back now!" I think I refused to believe I was in labour until I started pushing lol it was like I in denial as I was really scared of being told I had ages and to go home!