DH not interested in head teacher job

[Galla]

He's a great teacher with lots of experience and I assumed this is where is is heading. A perfect head job has just been advertised. Right distance away, not too far, not too near to bump into any of them. Small school which looks ideal to start off with.
I excitedly emailed him the link when I saw the ad. He got home from work and said he'd think about it. Which was not promising. Then said today he's not interested but might be in a year or two. Jobs this ideal wouldn't come around that often in our area. I can't really understand his reasoning and they don't make any sense to me
He doesn't like the current school. He has no camaraderie with these colleagues unlike previous schools. The boss is weak. He enjoys teaching but the current class isn't his first choice.
He wants to be a head, but says he doesn't know enough of what's involved and wants more experience.
Sounds reasonable-ish but he has years of experience and its easy to find out what's involved.
I think he might have lost some confidence in his abilities as he has been drained this year with difficult assistants and a bigger than normal workload.
Aibu to try convincing him that this is a lost opportunity and that he is very capable?
I know I can't make him do anything he doesn't want too, but it's frustrating.

At my daughters school. When the headteacher left the deputy took over as acting head. She was brilliant but she didn't want the job permanently. Job was advertised twice before anyone applied.
After about 9 months a new head was appointed. The deputy in the meantime applied for a deputy position in another school. Got the job and moved schools.
She simply didn't want to be a headteacher. Although money could have been a factor too. Deputy and headteacher salaries change depending on the size of the school.
This particular teacher is on almost the same wage as a deputy at her new school as she would have got as the headteacher of daughters school, as her new school has more classes. But doesn't have the stress/work of a headteacher.

Bear that in mind op. If it's a small school he might not see much change in wage but will be taking on much more stress/work.

Do headteachers work more than teachers then?

Do headteachers work more than teachers then?

I think the 70 hour minimum week is about the same for primary teachers and heads. Most heads work through the holidays (as indeed do teachers). You are on call as a Head during the holidays.

A few weeks ago I sent out some emails on Sunday afternoon and within 30 minutes all 7 heads had responded. So all logged on and working.

So about the same? I don't get the impression from mn that there are many gaps left to fill!

Are you kidding Stealth? Yes, and the buck stops with them, which in these times of unreasonable expectations (budget vs outcomes) is an utter nightmare.

I think Are you Lady Macbeth? is the funniest thing I've seen on here for ages

No not kidding genuine question. Teachers work long hours, a full day every weekend and most of the holidays. I don't expect heads do more.

Teachers work long hours, a full day every weekend and most of the holidays.

I don't.

Heads probably have more evening meetings and events than teachers. GB meetings, school disco, PTA, they have to attend them all.

The head teacher at dc school is at breakfast club , tea club, does various after school stuff, went on the trips, cheers on the sports teams in the rain...and that's just the visible stuff. So I fully get she works long hours but assumed the teachers did too

No, but Stealth I don't think you have much appreciation for the weight of responsibility Heads have compared to Teachers. It's just vast, from whether every visitor has the right tag on, to the minutiae of the quality of every lesson, to the dietary content of the school meals.

The grounds upon which a Head can be pilloried are huge. I want to hug my Head every time I see her just because she is prepared to take that on for us all.

If the average hours for a normal class teacher is 55 a week I think 65+ for s head is pretty much right.

hamandmustard spot on with your information, certainly the background you suggest is much more common in my area.
I am head of a small primary. After 3 years of 12-14 hour days plus a minimum of one weekend day, I am considering my future. I love my school, have a supportive staff, a supportive and effective local authority, don't have a regular teaching commitment at the minute but have had and will need to again and just know I can't continue at this pace, with this much pressure.
Small schools are particularly hard, the Ofsted framework requirements around middle leadership are impossible. Who leads who, once middle leaders are in place there isn't actually anyone left for them to lead! Some small schools may have only 2 or 3 teachers.
I lead all subjects, we struggle to recruit and retain teachers; budgets are cut so therefore staff, the workload is nearly impossible.
My adage is 'you can't please everyone all of the time' ; actually it feels you can't please anyone for a tiny bit of the time; parents, staff, Ofsted.

Rant over, apologies, post parents evening, not long in, little lunch and no tea! Starving but fairly happy at the minute that parents are happy with their child's progress.

OP if you want any family life at all, you will regret wanting your DH to be a HT. All consuming, even when not working; it is all I think about and when I try to focus on something else, on the rare occasions I have time, I am just too knackered!

Well, off to bed, up at 6.00am to do it all again!

Another head teacher here. OP, as a previous poster has said, it sounds like this is your dream job for your husband rather than his dream job for him. Being a head teacher is hugely rewarding, but hard, constant graft. I am never truly off duty. There is, as others have said, far, far less teaching contact with the children and the role is as much about managing the school as a 'business' as anything else. Of course, that 'business' relies on ensuring the right outcomes for children, and the children remain at the heart of all I do but the job is all consuming. I couldn't have done it when my children were much younger. I run a team of fantastic and committed teachers-like your husband-and they work incredibly hard, and not always for the rewards they deserve. However, the fact is that their errors are my errors by default. What happens in our school, anything at all, can be laid at my feet. Of course, successes belong to my teaching team, but failures belong to me. This is how it should be-we are accountable for the education of the next generation-I feel answerable to the adults our children will become. We only have one attempt to get their education right. It's not an accountability to be taken on lightly, or because your wife wants you to.

OP, your husband is a gifted and enthusiastic teacher by the sounds of it. Please let him carry on inspiring the children in his school and make the transition to school leadership in his time, on his terms. The education system needs more like him (I have a position available in KS2 if he's interested....)

For the record, I attend discos, breakfast club, sporting events at the weekends, the opening of school envelopes....but I avoid PTA meetings like the plague. For this, I use my fabulous delegation skills

Good teachers don't always make good heads
And some people are a bit shit on the lower rungs and thrive in management

Plus, our head rarely sees her own kid. And I mean rarely, the kid is basically raised by her parents and she almost prides herself on how she's never home (in the context of being totally unsympathetic or flexible to staff members family issues). But she loves being a head, and is a self confessed workaholic. Very few of us are jealous of her role, I honestly wouldn't want her job she can keep it!

but I avoid PTA meetings like the plague. For this, I use my fabulous delegation skills

Ahh but then you get slagged off on mumsnet for being aloof and not valuing parents.

Ahh but then you get slagged off on mumsnet for being aloof and not valuing parents.

It's a risk I am happy to run I begin every school day that I possibly can in the playground and end it in the same way, so I hope that is not levelled at me (if it is, it's never got back to me and parents are pretty vocal about these things...)

StealthPolarBear

My former HT doesn't. She's a whizz in the office and with paperwork but does no clubs, no teaching, no cheering, no trips, no PTA.

Does do Governors (obviously), productions and staff and SLT meetings.

Isn't overfond of parents either.

Of course, successes belong to my teaching team, but failures belong to me.

My Head see things like this and I wish I could wave a wand and make her take credit for how amazing our school is. Great Heads are special beasts and we shouldn't take them for granted.

OP you need to give your DH time to come to the role of his own accord.

Being a head is definitely a lot more responsibility than being a teacher and it is really a completely different job. The buck stops with them for everything. You would need experience of being a deputy first.

All the teachers I know (I know a lot!) work hard but they don't do a full day every weekend and most of the holidays unless they are young/newly qualified, with one exception that i can think of. They might do this at times but not regularly.

work hard but they don't do a full day every weekend

Sitting down at 4pm on a Sunday and planning/working until 10pm is the equivalent of a full day though (even if you are watching call the midwife at the same time) .

He's been a teacher for 10 years? Does he have lots of leadership experience within schools? Only, I've been a teacher for longer, with some management experience, and I wouldn't touch a headship with a barge pole.

Yes fruitpastille that sound more like my experience.

Well ok, Sunday night planning is pretty much a given!! I think that is one advantage of being a headteacher over a teacher.