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AIBU?

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Original poster

Upset about critiscm of unborn child name.

529 replies

patronsaintofglocks · 05/04/2017 13:22

To cut a long story short,

I am pregnant with my first child and DP and I have chosen two names.

For a girl: Noah
(I understand that many people prefer the spelling Noa for a female but we don't.)

For a boy: Ezra

I am sick and tired of my family telling us to change our minds/names. It's getting me down and making me second guess myself.

Does anyone have any advice?

OP posts:
GidgetMems · 05/04/2017 21:40

I doubt it, most people I know are pretty blunt and would tell me I was a twat. Technically it's her middle name but she's been known it since birth by her older sister who picked it. Most people now have no clue it's not her real first name. She knows and chooses to be known as Butterfly. It suits her, she flits from one thing to another. No big deal. I can't see her changing it later, she gets very cross now if anyone tries to use her other name. Wish I'd just put it as her first name on her birth certificate. As for the whole professional thing, if she chooses to do something like that then she can crack on. A name really won't hold her back. I honestly can't see it being an issue. But that's me. I just figure if she can love her name despite the oddness and have no one having an issue ( yes, I do realise it's not the norm! I'm not so bad as to think everyone should follow my lead!) then really 'Noah' is totally not going to raise an eyebrow in this day and age.

FWIW her first name would be considered more traditional/posh so she could butterfly flit into any profession with it.

Feilin · 05/04/2017 21:46

Both great names op i have a cousin called Nohla not noah i am aware but equally unique in todays climate . Go for it . From my pov id have been happier called noah than emmeline ...

Astro55 · 05/04/2017 21:56

if she doesn't luck out and end up in the popular crowd

Sad

It's crap but kids do get bullied over things like this

Kids get bullied because there are nasty people out there - they bully because they want too! Victim blaming again!!

user1489261248 · 05/04/2017 21:58

Technically it's her middle name but she's been known it since birth by her older sister who picked it.

@gidgetmems

Oh, so now you're announcing that Butterfly is her MIDDLE name? Wink

Not what you said in your post on page 17.

Next,you'll be saying it's actually a nickname that 'kind of stuck...' Like what happened to Miley Cyrus................. Wink

maddiemookins16mum · 05/04/2017 21:58

Ok, I've googled Blake Lively (etc), even more reason not to name a child after her offspring.

user1489261248 · 05/04/2017 22:00

Kids get bullied because there are nasty people out there - they bully because they want too! Victim blaming again!!

Oh FGS, nobody is victim blaming.

Over-reaction much?!

Astro55 · 05/04/2017 22:01

There are several posters who suggested naming a child would be a magnet for bullies -

That is a victim blaming over reaction!

Ramanama · 05/04/2017 22:07

In the original Hebrew the male name Noah has a hard 'ch' sound at the end like 'loch'. The female version sounds like Noa as we would pronounce Noah in English. Absolutely your choice and no one else's business.

FluffyEwok · 05/04/2017 22:08

there's a thread about calling a boy Rose on chat. How odd

BertrandRussell · 05/04/2017 22:10

I don't think she'll be bullied. I just think it will be incredibly boring and tedious for her for no good reason.

And I think we should give girls girl's names. What message are we sending them about being women if we don't?

SushiMash · 05/04/2017 22:16

This whole thread is hand wringing nonesense.

Boy - Ezra - Perefectly normal name.
Girl - Noah - Unusual because of the extra H, but nothing major. Told once sorted.

  • Noah is very popular as a boys name and is going to be one of those future generations 'dated names' and I personally find it really fucking boring as they are 10 a penny.
  • Maybe with a girl you'll avoid all that.

I really don't see the drama in this

AllPizzasGreatAndSmall · 05/04/2017 22:26

I doubt it, most people I know are pretty blunt and would tell me I was a twat.

Well nobody at school is going to call you a twat, but I can assure you when the name Butterfly appeared on the new reception class lists it would have given everyone in the staff room a laugh.

BathshebaKnickerStickers · 05/04/2017 22:27

#goose1964 - Mandy Patankin is short for Mandel - he is very very proud of his Jewish heritage

HarryPottersMagicWand · 05/04/2017 22:27

Noah is a stupid name for a girl. Never heard it it for a girl and you will be saddling her with a name that is used for boys. I don't care if the bible had 1 female Noah, it's a boys name.

Ezra is pretty cool actually. Let's hope it's a boy.

Butterfly as a middle name. Believe me I doubt anyone thinks this is a great name, they really just haven't told you.

maddiemookins16mum · 05/04/2017 22:29

Noah for a girl, nothing unusual.....fgs. It is.

GidgetMems · 05/04/2017 22:32

It is her middle name. She's just not been called her first name since birth. Therefore 'Butterfly' is her name. The school has her registered as it. And the Gp's. No one we've met on a casual basis knows it's not. It only comes up in deeper conversation. She introduces herself as it. Can't get much more 'her name' than that. It's a shame because I loved my choice for her first name and no one else did so everyone jumped on Butterfly because it wasn't my choice. She suits it though and loves it, so it ended well.

AllPizzasGreatAndSmall · 05/04/2017 22:33

Also the OP isn't talking about giving her daughter an unusual name that nobody has heard of, or using a word that isn't usually used as a name; she is considering a name that is quite common at the moment but is considered by 99% of people a boy's name.

GidgetMems · 05/04/2017 22:37

The staff at school have known since she was two and had to teach her brother to sign her name as he's non verbal and couldn't differentiate between his two sisters. When he did sign 'butterfly' to mean her, I'm pretty certain they were so proud of him that they couldn't give a shite.

But I genuinely don't mind if no one ever agrees it's a ok name. She loves it and she has an option to go back to if she does grow to hate it. It really is no big deal in the grand scheme of things.

TheSnorkMaidenReturns · 05/04/2017 22:38

I'm astounded by your arrogance @patronsaintofglocks, saying you are going ahead after your family warning you and 90% mumsnetters saying it's not fair on your child. Why did you post if you weren't prepared to listen?

You do not live in a bubble. Your child's name is not about you demonstrating your superior knowledge of historic names in the Bible. I'm sure you are terribly clever, and terribly well educated, and have excellent Biblical knowledge, but you do seem to be lacking in some thought for your child's future wellbeing.

One of my oldest friends came up with lovely, interesting names for her children. She told all the family not to worry, she lived in north London, everything would be fine. Roll on to teenage years and both she and her kids are pig sick of having to spell their names out, deal with being told 'oh that's an unusual name' etc. They haven't, to my knowledge, been bullied (it is north London) but they get fed up having to explain All The Time.

"Will nobody think of the children?"

GidgetMems · 05/04/2017 22:40

At least she'll never have to spell it out for people! Grin

Any way I'm done derailing the OP's thread. Lots of valid points made here, though I particularly liked the poster who asked her's son's opinion and his response. Couldn't say it better!

T2016 · 05/04/2017 22:42

Op I think your name choices are just lovely! Flowers

dingodon · 05/04/2017 22:47

You have made a very common first time parent rookie error aka telling people shit they don't need to know. As you know opinions are like arseholes everyone has them. Next time don't reveal names until after you have registered the birth.

If you name it Noah and it's a girl it will be teased.

In regards to the name itself never give a name you or your child has to spend the rest of its life explaining every single bloody time - been there done that got the t-shirt.

Brollsdolls · 05/04/2017 22:51

I know of a teenage 'Butterfly' who does the same hobby as my dd. I was a bit Hmm when I saw her name in print.

I agree Noah is a boy's name. Noa is lovely for a girl.

DingDongtheWitchIsDangDiddlyDe · 05/04/2017 23:02

The female "noah" in the bible is spelled Noa. It's pronounced differently and has a different meaning.

ciele · 05/04/2017 23:09

Presumably your parents are also Jewish?
So if you believe it to be so culturally acceptable why would they object?