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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To pull out of a house purchase at the last minute?

54 replies

MonsterBingo · 05/04/2017 09:51

We are about to exchange on our house purchase and sale. Before this house we saw our dream house but we hadn't sold our one yet and someone else snapped it up. We found this house which we really like but not quite as much as the first one.

Now, you guessed it, the first one is back on the market as their buyer pulled out. It feels very wrong to pull out at the last minute but on the other hand, would you let the house you prefer go, just to not upset a few people?

God, I hate this process!

OP posts:
Finola1step · 05/04/2017 09:54

How close to exchange? Today?

SouthWindsWesterly · 05/04/2017 09:56

If you haven't actually signed, you can but remember you will be out of pocket for arranging searches, surveys etc and will incur extra fees from the solicitor. Is house 1 in a chain? You would be putting them in a position if you are. It really depends how much you like house 2 and if it's your dream/forever house, as legally you won't be doing anything wrong but you might be putting house 1 sellers in a bad position where they may lose their dream house.

Original poster
MonsterBingo · 05/04/2017 09:57

Exchanging is a few days away.

OP posts:
Cocklodger · 05/04/2017 09:58

I wouldn't do it myself but I guess there's nothing legally wrong with it...
how badly do you want this house (the old "dream" house)?

SprogletsMum · 05/04/2017 09:59

On a purchase as massive as a house you need to get it right.
If the other house is really the perfect dream forever home then you have to do it really. As horrible as it would be for the sellers of the house you pull out of, you need to put yourself first.

Creampastry · 05/04/2017 09:59

On one side, you would be totally out of order and a cow and piss people off

BUT this is your home you are taking about.... go see the other one again pronto to check you do like it. If you have a chance with the other dream house, you have to go for it.

Id go for the dream house...

Mylittlestsunshine · 05/04/2017 10:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pitterpatterrain · 05/04/2017 10:02

We pulled out just before exchange years ago when we were FTB. Both trying to convince ourselves it was right, but it wasn't.

If it is not right, moving ahead is a much more expensive decision than calling it a day.

However: how will you feel if the "dream house" is actually not (e.g. bad survey) or your offer is not accepted?

Original poster
MonsterBingo · 05/04/2017 10:04

I actually like both houses but my dh really prefers the first one. He has been gutted from the moment we lost it and has been struggling to let that house go.

I would be gutted if we ended up with neither by pulling out. So would he, I think. Much rather the second house than no house!

OP posts:
Goldfishjane · 05/04/2017 10:05

I wouldn't
Dream house could have a bad survey, other issues, you might get gazumped etc etc.

averythinline · 05/04/2017 10:07

Go and have another look at dream house if possible...then
Think about how much spare cash you'll need to fix anything that comes up as pitter says...Or if you are outbid etc you could lose both.... But see if u can look again before making any decisions

MrsWhiteWash · 05/04/2017 10:08

I know a lot of house sales fall though but I'd be worried there might be hidden issues with first house that caused the sale to fall though.

How many time have you seen first house - might it be worth another look with critical eyes - and try and sound out why sale fell through?

RedSandYellowSand · 05/04/2017 10:09

What happens if the dream house buyers pulled out because it is unmortgagable? Or values at 100k below what the vendors will accept? Or is has a massive survey issue? Is it ok if this second purchase doesn't go through for some reason?
Yes, you will piss a lot of people off, but you can pull out.

Original poster
MonsterBingo · 05/04/2017 10:10

I think we will make an appointment to see if we still like it as much as first time around. And then make a decision. Hopefully DH and I will at least agree on how to proceed.

Current house sale is not in a chain btw, but think the 'dream house' is and it has just broken down, hence it is re-available.

OP posts:
Giraffe31 · 05/04/2017 10:11

If it really is that much of a dream house, others could have their eye on it too. You could pull out of this one and not get the dream house.

Bestthingever · 05/04/2017 10:17

You will piss a lot of people off but it's the biggest purchase you will make in your life so you need to get it right.

FrenchLavender · 05/04/2017 10:17

If your heart really isn't in the second house and you feel it's a huge compromise due to being put under pressure to find somewhere then pull out. It's crap for the vendors and it will cost everyone money but nothing like as much as it will cost you if you go ahead and can't learn to love it. You will end up moving again. I've made that very expensive mistakeIt wasted 18 months of my life and an awful lot of money.

No matter how many boxes a house ticks, you should always buy with your heart and not just your head.

I have also had a purchase fall through just days before the exchange date due to buyers further down the chain pulling out. I was devastated but I got an even nicer house second time around. They'll live.

SquinkiesRule · 05/04/2017 10:28

I'd go and view it again and ask the EA why it fell though. If they have been shown a bad survey I think they have to let you know what needs doing if it's urgent.
I know we pulled out of a house due to the survey. The EA went on to sell it and the new buyers were told about the survey, it didn't bother them hazards of living in a small village

ExplodedCloud · 05/04/2017 10:34

I'd be worried about why it has really fallen through. Valuation, survey, title issues etc. With the sort of timescales you have it could be hard to be sure.

GU24Mum · 05/04/2017 10:41

It's not the best thing to do all things being equal - BUT it's a huge decision and you don't want to spend the rest of your life regretting it. I'd at least go and re-view, speak to the EA etc then have a proper think. Yes, you may end up with neither house but equally you may decide to stick with the 1st one and find someone else pulls out so go with whatever you think is best.

ifonly4 · 05/04/2017 10:43

As said before, ask why it fell through before - ask for an honest answer so you can check things out now - the owners won't another sale falling through half way along. Also, go back and see it again - on a further viewing it might not seem so perfect.

If after this, you're not happy then you have every right to pull out. It's hard on everyone else in the chain, but you won't get this opportunity again.

We pulled out last minute on a house, we got our head around a negative survey, the solicitor pointed something out to us in the deeds on the Friday we weren't happy with and it was just the final straw. We pulled out on the Sunday and had been due to exchange on the Monday. We didn't want to loose our purchase, but looking back we did the right thing and ended up in a nicer house.

JaneEyre70 · 05/04/2017 10:45

Dream house all the way. Life's too short to not take a chance here and there. It's not just a house it's your future home. House sales fall through all the time and it's not necessarily due to surveys or issues.

Funnyface1 · 05/04/2017 10:48

I would go for the dream house, i know I'd regret it if i didn't.

thenewaveragebear1983 · 05/04/2017 10:49

Consider whether the owners of dream house would even accept an offer from you. Would you accept an offer from someone days away from exchange and about to pull out on another purchase? I certainly wouldn't.
We had two separate couples look round our house and use it as a bargaining tool with their actual purchase- and we categorically told the EA that we wouldn't accept offers from anyone in that situation.
Pull out of your purchase if its the wrong house for you, but don't assume that you will definitely get the house you want. It's a gamble.

Allthewaves · 05/04/2017 11:07

I'd go view dream house. Hit hard with offer, get them to take off market and make.sure you know why sale fell through