Aibu to think headmistress is living in la la land?

[Maxandrubyrubyandmax]

Get out of a 30 min meeting at work 5missed calls on mobile and my secretary comes rushing over at same time land line calls. Headmistress from ds school. DS has run into post and banged his nose. Can I get there immediately. Apparently DS is fine but we have to pick him up. Explain I will be about 45 min as need to pack up and get train and walk to school. DH about an hour away. Quizzed about couldn't a grandparent pick up
DS (no the nearest is 2 hours away). Didn't we have friends? Yes but it's not 1955 so they all work? Other relatives? No they live miles away and yes they work. Set off to school. Head mistress rings DH goes through same questions. As no one has moved house in last 5min gets same answer. Get to school. DS sat chatting to school secretary happy as you like. Head mistress goes through same questions nope still no one hAs moved or given up job in last 45 min. But there must be someone says the head. Well no actually there isn't. But she wants someone who can be at school in 5 min. Start to get pissed off. No one I tell her. She then shakes her head and says I guess that's how it is these days then. Aibu to be pissed off and felt judged about the fact I have moved away from the family home, got a job and don't just drop off child and sit at home all day? If it had been urgent I would have jumped in a taxi

That's terrible, Confuzzlediddled.

I'm the only one "there" for my child, my boss is great if I get the call of doom, but I'm half an hour away

It works

For anything more serious than this, it's 999, surely

I was once really late to pick my kids up from school
so the school rang round the "pick up" parents
sadly we were all stuck in the same gridlock on the motorway waving to each other
so the school just had to sit there with around 20 kids who could not leave

its the way of the world

there are times when the nearest family person to my kids is over an hour away

and YYYY to remembering the days before mobile phones and universal landlines

What did schools do in the days before mobile phones? I'm sure parents didn't sit at home all day waiting to be called

I don't agree with the majority of posters on this thread, probably because I am one of those poor downtrodden women who live in the 1950's. Yes, I am a SAHM.

If I was working and got a call from school telling me that my child had had an accident and needed picking up, I wouldn't have faffed about with walking and waiting for trains. I'd have been on my way in a taxi within seconds. My only concern would have been for my child and not the fact that the head had the gall to call me 5 times during a business meeting. The school did exactly the right thing. He had a head injury ffs.

I had this recently. Call frm school, I was more than an hour away - but they'd left it very late to call and nothing suddenly new - grandparent was nearby (usually many hours away) but was still 40 mins by nearest train and then a power walk. I called the school back to say grandparent was on their way. They were rather taken aback 40 mins was the best that could be done as if I can go home every day and make bunting etc as that's what the gooduns do. That school in general is ridiculous though, but yeah, sometimes there just is no other person and they need to realise that.

Omg OP thank you so much for posting this! I had a similar conversation with our new head at school. One of us should get a job that puts us within 10 mins of picking up apparently. I may have asked her if she wanted to pay my mortgage and then cried. Crying did the trick and she backtracked said she understood it was hard for working parents. 😉😉

In my case from where I was, a taxi wold have taken longer than public transport.

So why did they not call the DH straight away once it was obvious the OP couldnt pick up jolie.

I work from home so am usually 20 mins away..The school phoned me to tell me that my DS felt sick in December and I was Christmas shopping in the city Friday afternoon..I told Secretary where I was and I would get there as soon as I could..What is usually a 30 min drive took me just over an hour by the time I had got there his teacher had been in the office talked DS into going back to do something fun..He came skipping over when I arrived begging to stay..

I am a LP moved to a new town to escape abusive Ex... no family within 2 hours of travel so yes not everyone has someone to call on.

I work from home with my DH and if he answers the phone to the school they ask to speak to meThey run primary schools as if mum (and I mean mum) had nothing better to do than drop everything to collect early,bake ,attend sports day with 2 days notice

Not sure why DS needed to go home. Seems very OTT and doesn't really set a good example.

If it had been a real emergency I hope they would have insisted that your secretary got you out of your meeting immediately. In that situation I'm sure you would have just downed tools, made quick apologies and rushed over to the hospital in a taxi.

We are in a similar position - no Aunts or Uncles and only one Grandparent who has a life which doesn't involve siting in all day waiting for school to call. Our added problem is that neither me or DH can just walk out of work - we need cover first (obviously not in a life or death situation).

Every year we get the phone call when snow is expected (it rarely arrives - only twice in 10 years) that we need to be on hand and able to pick up within 30 minutes of a text to say school is closing - its madness - my DF can't even get his car out of his drive in the snow both DH and I work more than 30 minutes away. The headteacher was not impressed when I said that I wasn't able to take the day off just in case.

I'd be knackered. When timed with military precision both mine and husbands commutes take 1.5 hours. When having to just turn up at the station and get the next train it could be over 2 hours for either of us to get there. All my relatives are over an 8 hour drive away.

And just "jumping in a cab" wouldn't be an option. It's hard enough finding one to take you South of the river never mind 80 miles up the M1.

Thankfully the one and only time I've had to go in and collect was a day I was working from home.

I wouldn't have faffed about with walking and waiting for trains. I'd have been on my way in a taxi within seconds

good luck if you are in central London, it will take you longer by cab than it would by train. Are you really never leaving your house of a 2 mile radius during school hours? What a life. You are not even allowed medical appointment for yourself, just in case?

If the school is concerned about a head injury, why didn't they ask for immediate medical assistance? I would be more bothered about the carelessness than being disturbed in a meeting!

gatorgolf Our school had a sick bay. You lay in the sick bay. And if you said your mum was at home, another pupil was despatched to walk you home.

Exactly - you usually have to sign a form saying are you happy for emergency medical assistance to be sought if required. If they were that bothered about a head injury they should have called an ambulance/ taken child to A&E and informed parent while on way to seeking urgent medical attention.

I was in the middle of an actual fight , keeping two warring parties separated , when the school once rang me to inform me that DS1 was ill . Bizarrely everybody stopped shouting at each other when it rang , so I answered it , told them to ring his dad , whose day off it was , and put the phone down . Only for the warring factions to start screaming at each other exactly from where they were interrupted , but with added vigour due to their brief rest . That was memorable !

Op I agree with you. Dc do need to learn resilience too.

I work part time. On my workdays I could be at school in 20 mins. On my days off I am often much further away with my toddler - meeting friends an hour away or in the middle of a swimming lesson. We can't live our lives within a 5 mile radius of school expecting the worse to happen.

He'd banged his nose. Not a head injury.

Thing is, in 1955 no one had mobiles and not that many people had cars. Unless you lived 10 mins walk away from school and sat at home all day waiting for the phone to ring I can't imagine anyone would have been getting to school any faster!

Omg OP thank you so much for posting this! I had a similar conversation with our new head at school. One of us should get a job that puts us within 10 mins of picking up apparently. I may have asked her if she wanted to pay my mortgage and then cried. Crying did the trick and she backtracked said she understood it was hard for working parents. 😉😉

Good response. I'd have asked if she was offering me a job. It's not as if you can just change jobs just like that even if there happens to be a suitable vacancy in your area.

motherinferior And if it had been a head injury there would still have been an irreducible minimum time before anyone could get there.

OP Forgive me but expression "headmistress" is as 1955 as this HT appears to be

I hope your DS is OK.

Angelina. If DS had knocked himself out I would have jumped straight into a taxi! All he had was a very small cut well actually more a graze just under his nose. As neither my son nor I are prone to hysteria it was fine for both of us for me to faff about with trains. Also wasn't upset at the gall of HM to call so often (might have tried DH who generally does the pick ups) what makes you say that? But the repeated questioning???Congratulations on standing by the school gates between 9-3:39 btw waiting for a call so you can dash into the school at every small scrape your DC have. I assume you are never more than 2min away with perfect mobile signal????

I work from home and am usually 10 minutes away. If for any reason I couldn't get to the school, DH is an hour away at work, and our only other family are my dad (who would help in a heartbeat but he's 92, blind, almost completely deaf, wheelchair-bound and in a nursing home) and DH's parents and brother who are all five hours away apart from the one who's in Australia. We have one other work-from-home friend who's down as an emergency contact but he's about 45 minutes away. Local friends/neighbours/other mums from the school whom we could ask all work full-time. Surely this can't be all that unusual these days? It's only because my health is shot to pieces that I'm 'lucky' enough to work from home.