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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

NDN is trying to highjack potential buyers viewing our house.

53 replies

AmberStClare · 02/04/2017 15:36

Am currently selling our house and have found out my NDN is being very intrusive with anyone coming to view. They have lived next door to us for about four years and have always seemed OK, don't know them that well but they have been quiet and considerate so no issues with them. They are not the reason we are moving.

They are having extensive work done on their house and the wife is very excited about it and thinks everyone else is fascinated too. Knocked on the door on some pretext and asked if she could come in. FWIW she has never been in our house before which shows we are not that close. Suggested we might like to have copies of their architects drawings and display them for our vendors to look at as 'they would love to see what is going on next door'. My feeling is vendors are only going to be interested in how the work affects them noise wise etc and nothing else. Was polite and said leave them and I would tell the Estate Agent as they are doing the viewings.

Next time I see the wife she says she has just happened to be in the front garden when several people have come to see the house. She has had 'long lovely chats' with them and told them how lovely everyone in the road is and they are having work done and happy to show them. Yesterday reached a head when a friend came to see me for a coffee. Within minutes of her arrival NDN was on the doorstep asking if someone was viewing and maybe she could come in to meet them and have a chat.

I have mentioned to the Estate Agent who thinks she sounds unhinged and thanked me for the warning. They are going to arrive early so they can guide people straight into our house.

Anyway WIBU to tell my NDN to fuck right off.

OP posts:
hayli · 02/04/2017 15:39

no, it's good what you did. what a weird thing to do!

Revenant · 02/04/2017 15:58

I would find it very off putting to be hijacked at a viewing by a neighbour. I have a cordial relationship with my neighbours but I wouldn't want to think that I'd be chatted to every time I went in or out the house if I bought and it would definitely play a part in the buying decision. Maybe not tell her to fuck right off but a quiet word to ask her tone it down might be in order

GreenHillsSunnySkies · 02/04/2017 15:59

Yeah, she's gonna cost you a sale at this rate. I'd be very wary of moving into a house where the ndn had tried to lure me into her house to view the work she was having done, how the fuck is her home improvement relevant to the house I'm wanting to buy? Also all the business about long chats 'selling' the neighbourhood to me as a prospective buyer would have me thinking the whole street was full of intrusive wackjobs like her and I'd never have any peace or privacy.

SquinkiesRule · 02/04/2017 16:01

Next time she starts up a conversation about buyers, say that you had a couple who were very interested, but they backed out due to her hijacking them to talk about her house, it scared them off.

CatherineHate · 02/04/2017 16:01

Agree with others, currently house hunting and weird neighbours would put me right off.

Boulshired · 02/04/2017 16:04

I would like to see the plans if I was buying a house, could even be a selling point. But yes she does sound strange or bored.

Original poster
AmberStClare · 02/04/2017 16:15

Think she is desperate to have a young family next door as have a DD of their own and we have none. Told me she couldn't wait to have lovely new neighbours. Yes everything is 'lovely' to her.

Previous building work conversations have included one where she told me she had told her builders her lovely neighbours would be happy for them to walk through their garden at will and use the side entrance for transporting their crap about. (I went straight out and turned off the stopcock for our outside tap as no doubt we would love our water meter hammered for them to access when making concrete).

OP posts:
WrittenandGrown · 02/04/2017 16:15

I think I would have to have a word with her. She probably thinks she is being helpful but she really isn't.

Sorry you are in this situation.

Original poster
AmberStClare · 02/04/2017 16:16

Squinkies, thank you that is a good idea. Will save for when she tells me about a child with child who viewed and seemed lovely.

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Original poster
AmberStClare · 02/04/2017 16:16

Sorry couple with child

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Original poster
AmberStClare · 02/04/2017 16:18

The husband bobs about in the background smiling indulgently but saying nothing.

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Birthdaypartyangstiness · 02/04/2017 16:19

I viewed a house a few years ago. Nice house and area. But for the whole of the viewing a 50-something year old woman next door stood and stared over the wall, she must have been on a box or something. Literally just stood there while we all awkwardly ignored her presence traipsing around the garden, into the house and then back out round the garden where she continued her watch. Liked the house, area, everything so had a second viewing. She did the same. We didn't buy the house. Buying a house and realising your neighbours are bonkers is the worst kind of buyers remorse, we just didn't want to risk it after that.

I think I'd just go and ask your neighbour to allow people to view the house without intrusion, but of course, any serious purchasers may wish to contact her directly.

Goldfishjane · 02/04/2017 16:36

she sounds a bit unhinged

hopefully the EA can guide them away

also why on earth would she think you were fascinated by the architects drawings?

BonnyScotland · 02/04/2017 16:38

she will lose you a SALE... tread carefully

Pineapplemilkshake · 02/04/2017 16:38

It would put me off buying a house if there was an over-friendly loon living next door. In fact, I would tell her that one of the potential viewers decided not to make an offer after being hassled by her at the viewing.

Pineapplemilkshake · 02/04/2017 16:39

*buyers not viewers

Cinderpi · 02/04/2017 16:40

Just to give the opposite point of view: we were doing a second viewing of a house with the agent (owner had died and agent didn't know any details at all). Very elderly neighbour pottered out after we finished and invited us into his house to see 'what could be done' as he knew the house we were looking at needed work. He and his wife were lovely, really keen for us to buy and promised us free rhubarb from their garden if we did. I'd been in two minds before meeting them but put in an offer afterwards - friendly and forward neighbours can really sell a house!

Meluzyna · 02/04/2017 16:42

The evil witch in me would be arranging for all my friends to visit at two-hourly intervals all weekend just to wind her up. Not really helpful, I suppose.....

Original poster
AmberStClare · 02/04/2017 16:43

Our interest up until now has been solely how the work would affect us until we left and making sure whoever moves in has an easy time of it. No noise at unreasonable times, no unauthorised access to our land, making good any damage that sort of thing.

Looked at the plans and they are not our taste at all. They are tearing out a lot of the original features. We are selling emphasising the ones we have so buyers visiting for those are not going to be remotely interested in their work.

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Original poster
AmberStClare · 02/04/2017 16:45

If I was offered free rhubarb yep would confirm the sale for me!

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SmitheringSmithison · 02/04/2017 16:45

I would phrase it slightly differently Grin but ywnbu.

I moved into dh (then dp) house and found he has a neighbour like this, he gives me a stabby rage! Everytime I step out of the house it's 'where you off?', 'where is he?' (On about dh), 'when's he home?', etc. If I come in it's all 'where you been?', 'what you bought?'.
If I have guests he accosts them as they pull up, if I'm chatting to them as they get in their car he comes across and just starts chatting-seemingly missing that we're actually in the middle of a conversation already. I dread summer as everytime me or the dc go out in the garden he's there chatting shit and has his gc hassling my children to play when they're down even when mine have said no thanks.

Sorry got into a rant there, but yeah neighbour would put me off.

paxillin · 02/04/2017 16:48

I imagine that she might put people off, especially the young families she is after. It is really tough to get rid of an intrusive neighbour if you have kids of a similar age. People like this also blow hot and cold in my experience, today's over familiar neighbour starts tomorrows hedge row war. I'd buy a different house unless this one was hugely unusual or much cheaper than comparable ones.

WormwoodScrubbed · 02/04/2017 16:52

Twenty years ago now but my then NDN's complained that my disabled sister's grab rails lowered the value of their house (not true and irrelevant as they were never gonna move) and when it came to selling the place they gave me a list of who I could and couldn't sell it to (which was a racist list to say the least) and told me in no uncertain terms to 'think of them' when choosing who to accept an offer from Hmm

Anyway I hope you manage to sell your house, sounds like your NDN is like the ones I had who basically wanted a say in who their new neighbours should be they can all get screwed

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 02/04/2017 16:58

Blimey, she does sound extremely desperate for friends! I'm assuming she has none, that she's accosting anyone who comes to your house to show them her extension works!

Yes, it would put me off to have someone like that living next door. It really would, so I do hope the EAs manage to keep her off your potential buyers!

Original poster
AmberStClare · 02/04/2017 17:06

My DP is very keen to go and tear her a new one but the EA have said not to! Might be counted as a dispute we would have to mention to buyers.

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