AIBU to let my son skip this at school?

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My DS is 10 and has been doing WW2 at school. Tomorrow the class are watching "boy in the striped pyjamas". We had to sign a consent slip last week and were happy to do so. Tonight he has been in tears saying he doesn't want to see it.

My DP has made some good points about how important a film it is but I hate to think of him so upset. AIBU to tell his teacher that he can sit it out?

I'm almost 36 and I won't even read the book- it was bought for me a few years ago and I cannot force myself to open it. I don't think there's anything wrong with a 10 year old not wanting to see the film and I would not force mine.

In any case, there are better books and films. What's wrong with actual testimony? Quite a few people have pointed out problems with the book in question. The Holocaust should be taught and our dc should feel grief and horror- but the actual testimony of survivors and those who 'liberated' the camps does that very well.

I have seen it. I know my almost 10 year old would not be ready to watch that yet. I wouldn't be against them touching on the subject but the film would be too much for my son to take in. So I would probably opt him out.

What a great Mum you are OP.
You are right to listen to your Son, he very obviously feels uncomfortable about it. It would be awful if he did indeed get upset, and was teased about it for evermore.
I agree that everyone needs to know about the Holocaust, but in my opinion, he isn't ready for that.

I haven't seen it personally as I know it would upset me (though I realise the historical inaccuracies in it), at 10 he knows his own mind and should be offered the same choice I feel.

I have read The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas and seen the film.... and agree it is not suitable for such a young child.

May I suggest you watch Life is Beautiful with him instead?

www.imdb.com/title/tt0118799/

The boy in the striped pyjamas is a shit story, completely implausible and very patronising in its attitudes towards the victims: don't see why it would be an essential part of understanding about the Holocaust at all.

What Cory says - it's unoriginal, unbelievable (no way would the child of a guard, let alone the Kommandant, be allowed anywhere near the inmates of the camp), patronising, over-sentimentalised crap. However, I doubt that anything it portrays will upset most children (though if your son is very sensitive it may affect him). It really doesn't show any of the horror (thank God, as they are showing it to young children) - just hints.

I don't know if you've seen it, but I think it's on YouTube if you want to watch it yourself first and make your judgement over whether your son could cope

Sentimentalising the Holocaust is insulting to the victims. Two excellent books for children are "The Silver Sword" (Ian Serrallier) and "I am David" (Ann Holm). These are empathetic without being patronising, and reading about this period in (factually accurate) fictionalised accounts may be more appropriate for your son. Reading also gives your child a chance to put down the account if it is too distressing (though these are well written children's books, and don't overstep the mark in any way) and to ask questions or make comments as he is taking in what is happening.

It also gives you the opportunity to help his understanding of this horrific period (Holocaust Memorial Trust has suggested some ideas fro discussion around "The Silver Sword" and possibly "I am David", too.)

hmd.org.uk/sites/default/files/the_silver_sword.pdf

Both books have been made into films, but I haven't seen them so can't comment.

I would err on the side of caution if I were you. If he decides he wants to watch it (perhaps after his classmates have talked about it), you can always get hold of a copy somewhere.

I disagree with Meluzyna that "Life is Beautiful" would be more appropriate.

It is a much better film, and ends on a wonderful ray of hope, but it is more graphic. (Again, it is unbelievable. However it is a much better story and is well told. BISP is total badly-written bollox and the film is bleauuuuch)

Just because some absolutely horrendous things happened to children in WW2 and are still happening to children in some parts of the world does not mean that we have to subject our children to things that they are not ready to handle.

Yes the trauma this may cause is nothing compared to the trauma of refugees but that does not justify age inappropriate content giving our children nightmares.

The details of the holocaust are best taught when they are of an age to understand the context and as a previous poster said, more able to compartmentalise their feelings.

10 is way too young for that movie IMO. We went to see it at the cinema, thinking it was going to be a story of hope and redemption (that's how they advertised it...) and at the end no one moved or spoke. There was just stunned, strangulated weeping from various parts of the movie theatre. I'd rather let my kids see Schindler's List.

there is a good schools version of schindlers list

also the Silver Sword is brilliant I agree

Just had a look at ZebraOwl's suggestions on Amazon (they are both "look insides" so you can read a bit). The seem to be good.

If it's a 12, surely school aren't allowed to show it to them anyway?

And don't they have to have a special version to show them? You can't just buy a DVD and stick it on, I think, due to copyright laws...

There is better Holocaust material out there, frankly, and this film is not a particularly stellar example. It's completely implausible. There's no need to generate ludicrous fictions about the event when the facts are enough.

I also think it's too young.

I had to watch Schindler's List at around 13 and I didn't want to, so I left my glasses off and watched a blur instead. At college they seemed to delight in making us watch violent, rape-filled torture movies that were 18 rated, so we could discuss genre (in English Literature) and I skipped them all because I personally don't like that stuff and didn't feel a bunch of adults could force me to watch them.

Yeah. 10's too young and I'd let him skip.

AlexanderHamilton I absolutely agree with you. I also agree with those recommending When Hitler Stole Pink Rabbit and Anne Frank. I read Number the Stars as a 10 or 11 year old. That was also agood introduction to learning about the Holocaust in my experience.

There's no need to generate ludicrous fictions about the event when the facts are enough.

@Roanoke thank you, that's a perfectly succinct summing up of why a lot of Holocaust fiction makes me really uncomfortable.

i hate this forcing kids to watch films.
why not read the diary of anne frank,

Bobbins43:

It's not actually the case that schools can't show a film with a higher age guideline than the age of the students. They can. The rating is a guideline only. It prevents the film being commercially shown, sold or rented to someone under the age rating, but it doesn't prevent a responsible adult showing the film.

Watch it with him at home. I think it's important to watch, but I'm a blubbering mess myself watching it. I'd hate to watch it in front of colleagues.

OP - I'd be interested to hear what your DS chose. My guess is that he chose what his friends did.

I was made to watch a documentary in the 70s when I was a wee 'un called Holocaust (I have no desire to find out more about this). I don't remember much about it except a scene where children were forced to watch their parents being shot. I would have been 9-11ish. I also remember some children being gassed in the showers and their mother hugging them. All it has given me is a life-long aversion to anything remotely connected with WW2. I just can't do it. It didn't give me insight, empathy or any special powers of understanding. It just made me sick and had just a long-lasting impact that I get flashbacks to those scenes today, even though I barely consciously remember them. They are often what I think about when I can't sleep.

OP, good for you for listening to your DS. I agree with many pp, this film is dire, grossly historically inaccurate and wholly unnecessary to inflict.

FWIW, my DD had this book and film in Y6. But I declined to give permission for the film, as my DD didn't want to see it, and I couldn't see any benefit. She knew quite a bit about the Holocaust.

And respectfully, I would question not discussing the Holocaust with children. It's one of the defining events of the last century, and kids can handle it if dealt with straightforwardly, in an age appropriate way and dealing with questions over time.

Yes. When Hitler Stole Pink Rabbit is one thing... but making kids watch graphic content is another ... (I'd add that that documentary is not the only one I was made to watch).

The school have sent the slips home so parents can decide whether it's appropriate for their child at this time. If you don't feel it's appropriate then don't give permission.

@vaginasuprise

I didnt say all childen but there was no special treatment of children. Over a million Jewish children died. That wasn't from neglect in special children's sections (Mengle had one of those for his experiments), it was industrial killing of children.

Our school teaches WW2 but focused on the Blitz and rationing. It gives kids an idea of what life was like as a child during the War (in the U.K.). They watched Goodnight Mr Tom at the theatre and didn't learn about any battles or the Holocaust.

I think that most y5/6 in U.K. have rightly heard of Hitler and the Holocaust and that detailed films like Striped Pyjamas and Schindler's List can wait a bit longer.

TBF, Schindler's List takes some fairly serious artistic licenses in the truth department.

There are lots of testimonies written by survivors aimed at children that are age appropriate.