To be selfish over new partner

[Downwithpeppa]

To cut a long story short , I've been dating a man since January , about a month in he told me he'd been to prison for manslaughter , I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt as I really liked him and things have continued to go well he's given me absolutely no indication of being dangerous or anything . He comes off lovely and acknowledges the seriousness of what he did nearly 10 years ago . last week my dad found out and has gone absolutely ballistic and demanded I not speak to this man again or give up my relationship with him. I do have children but they have not been involved at this point. Aibu to ignore my dad and continue the relationship ?

Google his name OP to get the details of the crime. You need to know the facts, not just his version which may or may not be fully truthful.

Totally depends on the details.

If it was an accident at work for example, maybe ok, depending on the details.

If it involved violence on his part that led to someone's death, even if unintentional, probably not.

As others have said, depends on circumstances. I know someone in my wider circle that was convicted of manslaughter years ago he is a lovely man and I'd happily have him around my kids.

However no decent parent would be happy about their child dating a convicted criminal. If you really like him then it'll just be a case of slowly winning your dad round.

Also if he did it nearly ten years ago, which is how i read your op, I'd guess he is not long out of prison?

I have researched it it all adds up , it was 2 years in prison , has been out for 7 years sorry it read like he had been in for 10 years I meant it was 10 years ago ., has very good job and mortgage . It was a fight gone horribly wrong . Thank you so much for helpful comments .

I don't get the title of the OP, does your dad want a piece of him?

With the new info, it's a definitely maybe but it certainly isn't a definite dumping.

Are you sure op? It's usually very difficult for criminals to get a job never mind a very good one and a mortgage. And two years for manslaughter is very low.

Op can you go to your police station and request a Clare's Law? At least then, you're dealing with the full facts

From your last post, OP, what I would now want to know is, has he got form (other than this) for getting into fights (even ones that don't end tragically)? Has he got a short fuse, has he got difficulties controlling himself, does he have the kind of friends who might consider pub fighting normal behaviour, has he got problems (even latent ones) around alcohol?
Those are all things that could badly affect your dc's lives, so those are what I would want to know.

You've been with him for 5 minutes and already referring to him as a 'partner'. He's a crim. I'd be very surprised if he's telling the truth. I'd go with Clare's Law. Really hope you don't have this guy around your kids.

it was a fight gone wrong

I'm sorry OP, but I agree with your father. Even if your new partner is sorry for what he did, i wouldn't want my children around a man who ended up killing someone in a fight. No way on earth.

Fight gone horribly wrong sounds a bit like he's minimising his actions op xxx

Sentenced to 5 served 2.5 , I'm sure on the job as have helped him work out taxes , haven't seen deeds to the house but have seen the house. He appears very honest . Realistically he's in a good place now , I may not appear sensible from the nature of the post but I'm smart enough to see warning signs of abuse from previous relationships . It may not even work out but I'd like the opportunity to see if it could .

Be prepared for some SS involvement if you have children - I would actually personally approach SS myself to ask their advice and to start the ball rolling.

2 years for manslaughter for a "fight gone wrong", I would ask how old he was, whether it was something like a single punch death (which is not acceptable but unfortunately happens), what he had done to ensure it never happens again (counselling, anger management, sorting out potential substance misuse problems) and whether it was in self defence?

Definitely go to police station and request the info under Claire's law...

I'm sure on the job as have helped him work out taxes

Are you doing his taxes for him? Or have I misunderstood this bit?

Yes yes to Clare's Law too - awesome idea.

There are many young men who have punched people and some could have ended up in manslaughter convictions if they hit them hard and or they ended up on the pavement. This is a difficult one. He served his time and it sounds like he has subsequently turned his life around. So I think you are in a difficult position. Was there a weapon involved? Personally I think that documentary one punch should be shown in all schools at about age 14 so everyone realises the consequences of fighting which can be devastating.

'Fight gone horribly wrong'.

2.5 years. For killing a person, probably a young man. Cannot imagine being so incredibly cavalier about a person who got violent in a fight and killed someone. Wonder how his family feel about him? I can tell you how they feel about their dead child.

Personally I think that documentary one punch should be shown in all schools at about age 14 so everyone realises the consequences of fighting which can be devastating.

Me too - I also think schools should ensure every one that is involved in a punching incident in schools has access to an anger management course - so many schools just let it slide as "playground usualities".

Oh. I would also ask if he was involved with a restorative justice process with the family as well?

Sorry OP but the fact you have been abused in previous relationships and you are now entering in to a relationship with a convicted killer, taking his side over your father's...I find that disturbing.

True, Show.