To feel annoyed and uncomfortable about this?

[JuicyGem5]

So my dh has been asked to come on holiday with his ex and his dss, they are going to Morroco in August and have asked dh to come along as she doesn't want to drive in a foreign county. She has also asked dh to pay 50% of the cost. The hotel is one on the Atlas Mountains and is actually really nice and the arrangements would be like a family room with dh having his own bed but in a connecting room.

I have two problems with this

1. They will be eating out together and sharing a hotel room all be it connecting I don't trust her and I'm insecure as she is a very beautiful women.
2. It is a three week holiday in the summer holidays takes up all of dh's holiday which means he doesn't get to see my dc or his dc with me in the summer break.
3. We were planning to do something with the kids in Cornwall or Devon for a week but this cannot be affordable for us now.
4. I can't see why she can't pay for private transfers into Marrakech or the airport.

5 it's not like her dss is young he is 16.

Aibu to think dh should refuse this and instead pay for his ds and our children and my children to pay for a holiday for all of us as this seems fair.

I think it is very selfish and I think dh should say no to it but I get why he wants to do it.

Not a chance! And if he does go I'd be telling him to take his suitcase of washing to hers upon his return and he can bloody stay there, with the rest of his stuff to follow asap.

I agree, if he did go against your wishes, he would not be a dh anymore, and would be out on his rear.

I will be amazed if anyone says YABU, it's so out of order I can't believe he is even considering it -just no! YANBU at all

Absolutely no way would I let this happen!

I would be very suspicious if your dh wants to go!

No fucking way.

Are you quite sure they aren't back together?

YANBU.

If she has trouble driving in a foreign country (understandable) why didn't she choose somewhere that wouldn't involve her needing to drive? Plenty of places the world over are safe to visit with excellent public transport.

Fuck no! Does your DH really think this is reasonable??

This isn't real is it?

I'm the most laid back, liberal person ever, and like FUCK this would be happening in my household -unless he wanted his possessions on the doorstep on his return.
I would say this is very clearly set up by his ex as an opportunity to either ger back together with her ex OR fuck up your relationship/piss you off/exert her power and dominance.
Ask your DH to reverse the situation. How would he feel if you pottered off to foreign climes with a handsome ex for three weeks in "adjoining" (yeah, for how long) rooms? Lets guess he wouldn't be overjoyed.

13 years of feeling guilty is a long time.
And 13 years and still having learnt to be independent and able to get on her own two feet wo support is also a very long time.

I would suspect she can't afford to pay for that holiday so have your DH pay half of it.

And yes the answer is a resounding NO.
Spending most of his hols with her so little with you. Issues with all the family holiday money going towards that, so none left for you two. Nope not happening.

OP's other (troll) thread is being deleted. This is a wind up.

No, no, no, no, NO!

I may have misread but they have been seperated for 13 years! Who on earth after all this time does he think he has to do this 'for his son's sake'?

Sorry OP but it does sound like there's more to this story.

AKA dumptrump17. Classic name change fail.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2882060-To-have-been-really-offended-by-dss-comments-about-me

Ah well, it was fun while it lasted

YANBU because this arrangement will mean you and the dc will have to forgo a holiday. OP you said that he offered, so not sure why everyone is jumping on the ex? I would be concerned about your dh's selfishness more than anything.

My DP's separated at a similar age and I would have given my right arm to go on holiday with my DP's together rather than on holiday with them and their add ons new partners

If your husband wants to spend 3 weeks with his son then they should go on a father and son holiday together not with ExW!

I would say no - on money and using up all his holiday grounds.

\the Ex is being goady

oh my

I thought your DSS was 14?

You may have said No, but what is your DH actually going to do?

Hullo everyone,

Thank you to everyone who reported this thread to us - we're going to take it down now, as we have some doubt about the OP.

Another one bites the dust...

Oh FFS.

no, no, no! Glad see you've already said that to him. If she wants to go on hols, but can't drive, she's picked the wrong holiday!!!

Wtf do people do this ......