To feel annoyed and uncomfortable about this?

[JuicyGem5]

So my dh has been asked to come on holiday with his ex and his dss, they are going to Morroco in August and have asked dh to come along as she doesn't want to drive in a foreign county. She has also asked dh to pay 50% of the cost. The hotel is one on the Atlas Mountains and is actually really nice and the arrangements would be like a family room with dh having his own bed but in a connecting room.

I have two problems with this

1. They will be eating out together and sharing a hotel room all be it connecting I don't trust her and I'm insecure as she is a very beautiful women.
2. It is a three week holiday in the summer holidays takes up all of dh's holiday which means he doesn't get to see my dc or his dc with me in the summer break.
3. We were planning to do something with the kids in Cornwall or Devon for a week but this cannot be affordable for us now.
4. I can't see why she can't pay for private transfers into Marrakech or the airport.

5 it's not like her dss is young he is 16.

Aibu to think dh should refuse this and instead pay for his ds and our children and my children to pay for a holiday for all of us as this seems fair.

I think it is very selfish and I think dh should say no to it but I get why he wants to do it.

Well, why can't he go on holiday with you, or he takes him on holiday without his mother, sorry that is not right, I would not be ok with that.

Wow there is no way I would allow that to happen. That's crazy!

It'll mess with the child's head.

I even suggested her going on holiday in the same place as us obviously maybe a different hotel but same resort area if she wants dh on the holiday so much. She should go places where she can go on holiday alone rather than a place she has to be out with a man.

I trust dh but I do suspect her motives.

Is the father of your children? How many children are there altogether?

How can any woman invite her ex for a holiday and not include his wife? Does she not see that this is totally unacceptable? And he's considering it?

Big HELL NO from me.

I'm usually the most free and easy person here but even I would say no to that. You just don't go on a 3 week holiday with an ex.
His son should come on holiday with you.

No it won't be happening. My kids deserve a holiday with there dad just as much as dss or her.

Whaaaat?!

Your dh is being utterly ridiculous by agreeing- your beef should be with him!

I agree with Robinia, I'm usually very chilled out but this would be a big fat no from me too.

Are your children his as well?

I think, as often the case in these scenarios, your husband is the problem here

Like I said even though I trust dh I think she will definitely try it on. After all it was him that left her.

Oh yes I've told dh he's not to go.

Yes. I agree with the others. It's your husband- he should have laughed it off as ridiculous the first time she mentioned it!

Did he leave for you ?

I was going to say you were maybe being a little unreasonable till I read it was for three weeks. And she wants him to pay 50%! And it would mean you and your DC not getting S holiday.
So totally not unreasonable at all considering all that! Cheeky one she is asking for all that!

But, for God's sake, your dh should not be agreeing to this! Have you actually told him you're not comfortable understatement with this?

Does he not care it leaves you and your DCs unable to have a holiday?! As for the practical arrangements

His ex can pick another country to visit and a trip she can afford on her own. Your DH should be enjoying a holiday in this country with you and all your DCs together.

Why would you not be invited too? I'd mainly be annoyed that my DH was using up 3 weeks of holiday and loads of money of a holiday I'm not invited on!

I can't believe she'd even think it was acceptable to suggest it! YANBU

I find the fact he's suggested it quite worrying. Are you sure nothing's going on as that's the most ridiculous scenario I've ever heard.

She's getting Morocco and you can't even afford Cornwall, why are you entertaining this disrespect? If he goes it means you and the rest of the kids lose out on a holiday because he will have spent the money on a holiday for him, his ex wife and their child.

That is insanity in itself, him swarming off on a foreign jaunt to enjoy himself with her, say no, it's as simple as that. He's being selfish and obviously to some extent he must think you're a push-over.

You're a fool if you stand by and let this unfold!

Yes, I'd be extremely worried that your DH sees nothing wrong in this and is actually considering it. She's not your biggest problem; he is.

if he goes... he doesn't come back... simple x

I'm actually gobsmacked that she thought this was ok to ask him to do, that he even considered it was a good idea for him to go, and that you (even for a millisecond) wondered if you were BU. YANBU.

Big no way would be my answer.