To be irritated by comments about small baby

[Dontfencemein]

An acquaintance who has 3 children herself came up to me and DS (13 months) and said something along the lines of
"Wow. He is so tiny. He still looks like a baby. Usually when you don't see a baby for a while you think they'll have grown but your DS always looks like a baby".

AIBU to be quite irritated by this and wonder why she bloody said it?

DS has always been on the small side and lurked around the 9th centile. He's had a run of ill health in the last six weeks and has been in hospital for a few nights. Hopefully we are over it now but even without recent events, I think it's off to comment like that on a child's size.

Or am I being over sensitive?

[Sisinisawa]

I get this all the time. I make small children. Now I answer with "yes he is small but so advanced! His speech is amazing!" Which is true but also shuts them up.
It's very irritating having everyone comment on your healthy but small child op. I share your pain.

[GirlInterruptedOftenByKids]

Yanbu! My ds was scrawny as a baby and it so upset me when people commented. He's still thin now (8yo) but eats like a horse, leggy and full of bounce. So nothing wrong with him :)

[Harebell]

F off is a sentence☺

[Bloosh]

I'm so with you. Since dd was a toddler people have commented on her being tall - my best friends, her grannies, random acquaintances. just shut up!!!

[Bluebell28]

I had that with one of my children, it was irritating. .I just used to say " how's your cough" and move the pram. Child grew to over 6 foot.

[RiverTamFan]

Got loads of this nonsense over the years with two of mine. So they are short and skinny? So what!

As a paediatrician once said to me, after primary school had been moaning about DS's weight, "Yes, he's on the first percentile but someone has to be!". Certainly wasn't for lack of food. He was stick thin throughout his entire childhood and it used to shock people who had him around for tea when he cheerfully tried to eat them out of house and home! The problem with opinions is that everyone has one.

[Flugelpip]

YANBU. Anyone who says you are never had a small baby. My first DS was born early, a six pounder, and had no fat at all on him until he was 5 or 6 months old. He was by far the smallest in my NCT group. He wasn't even ON the charts. Every time people commented on his size I cried. I felt I was letting him down somehow by not feeding him enough or not knowing what to do to make him bigger. I worried he was sick.

He is now a magnificently tall, broad-shouldered 7 year old and one of the biggest/strongest in his class (not that that means a lot at this stage but it still gives me a thrill to see him thriving). Try not to worry about him and practise glowering at stupid people who make comments. They may not mean to upset you, but you don't have to pretend it hasn't upset you.

[Lovelymess]

You're being a bit sensitive. A lot of the time people seem to feel they need to say "they're so big, small, look so much like you or the dad. Almost just something to say. Don't take it to heart

[LittleRed90]

My daughter was on the 2nd centile for what seemed like forever. Just ignore the comments, you'll always get them x

[ImFuckingSpartacus]

YANBU. Anyone who says you are never had a small baby

People with very small babies have said YABU. I agree with them.
It's not a bad thing. Some babies are small, some are big. Nobody outside their family actually gives a fuck, they are just making small talk.

[PetalMettle]

Thank you for sharing @flugelpip

[Craigie]

YAB over sensitive.

[pollymere]

My daughter was ninth percentile at six weeks...but was huge when born. I used to get lots of comments about her size and I'd always reply with I know, you'd never believe she was 8'11 when she was born would you....it was great fun. She's now 50th and a great weight/height. The most important thing though is that she's healthy. Think of some witty reply if you need to but as other posters have said, people are always rude no matter what!

[Hadenoughoftumble]

People say the weirdest things!

A doctor once said to me while examining my baby ds 'please don't do anything cosmetically to your son's ears whilst he is still a child'. Like wtf?! She said it out of nowhere!! I just said 'why?! What's wrong with his ears?' And she just looked embarrassed that she had said anything!

[ChrisYoungFuckingRocks]

My DTDs were born at 28 weeks, and when they came home after 4 months in hospital, they were still under 5lb, and they were teeny tiny. I got so many comments, but I was just so proud that they were actually alive that I didn't mind. Now they're 8, and DTD2 already reaches my shoulder - she's the youngest in her class, but one of the tallest (DTD1 is a couple of inches shorter).

Just roll with it and don't let it upset you. Someone will always say something about something, that's just the way life is.

[marhav999]

YANBU. For some reason people feel entitled to make insensitive remarks about others and you are then too sensitive if you find it hurtful or offensive. Their mothers obviously failed in their duty to teach them MANNERS! I won't make excuses for their ignorance. No matter what you think, you should have the wit not to voice anything other than a positive view about someone else's child.

[ChrisYoungFuckingRocks]

DTD1 has honey blonde ringlets - I mean corkscrew curls that you can boing. People have always asked me if I perm her hair, even when she was 2. Yeah, right, I'd perm my 2 year olds hair! And get her to sit still long enough. That pissed me off much more than people commenting on how tiny she was.

[Kika2901]

Next time someone comments on your child's appearance just make an observation on theirs?! "Oh look how tiny he is, was he premature?" "No but look at your chunky thighs! What do you eat every day?"! Should shut them up!

[BusMum79]

YANBU. Both of my kids are really small for their age and people love to comment on it. With DS1, who spent most of his first year on the 0.4th centile, I was really sensitive about it and it upset me when people pointed out how little he was. He's now 3 and on the 9th. DS2- who is 18 months- hovers between the 5th and the 9th. When people say anything about him I joke "he's a giant compared to my first" and just move on. People shouldn't comment, but they do. Don't let it upset you too much (easier said than done)

[farfarawayfromhome]

YANBU. my DD was prem and 4 pounds. At 3.5 she is still on the 5th centile and dwarfed by two year olds. It is grating when people comment on it as there is usually an insinuation that there is something wrong with her. There isn't. We can't all be heifers.....

[gribak]

Yes those comments are thoughtless and can hurt, you just never know what someone has been through when you comment on how small a baby is. So much lovelier to say how gorgeous their baby is instead!!

[Mummykempy]

What people also don't realise is that you might have heard that comment multiple times that week/day and so it does start to make you worry.
As many have said- if people need to say something just say something positive and be kind. Especially other Mums- we're all in need of a boost sometimes, not additional worries!

[MsJudgemental]

When I was about 8 months pregnant I overheard an obstetrician telling a junior that my baby was 'too small'. I called her out on it. Too small for who? I am 4' 9" and my husband is 5' 7". He was never going to be an 8-10 pounder, DS was 5 lb 9oz when he was born (2.52kg) and the right size for me. He then went between 2nd and 9th centile for many years and is now smallish for his age (17) but his taller girlfriend doesn't care.

[littlemummyfoofoo]

I agree it has comment 1 by Wishiwasmoiradingle2017 but want to add OMG everyone said the say kind of crap to our lo and at first it made me fuming...because they could say he's a happy chap.. or lovely eyes..blah blah instead it was all about size!small...tiny little..argh.. your baby is the size mine was at 12 weeks...oh I thought your baby was younger. ..blah blah Even now as he's got bigger and sneaked up to thd 50th percentile.. its all about size and weight.... people are obsessed with him being 'a good eater' 'gets the eating a lot from our side of the family'. ..'how's he eating' I'm not fat (cant get down passed 10 stone though..) and nieither is my hubby but we were and both easily put on weight. We don't want our lo to think more food and big portions are good. We want to have a child who doesn't think food is a big deal, and knows when to stop. Who sees us eating healthy options and leaving food when full. Don't get me started on people thinking I'm mean cos I won't let lo eat sugar!

[Daydream007]

Some people are so rude and set out to upset your day. Ignore people like this.