Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6

Original poster

to still be really annoyed about this woman?

137 replies

Springersrock · 13/03/2017 12:02

I had to take 15 year old DD shopping yesterday. She needed a black, zip up hoodie for PE at school and some foundation. Half hour, job done....so I thought.

Trailed round the shops where she tried on and discarded god knows how many identical plain black hoodies before we ended up back where we started. My patience is now wearing thin

We then move on to the foundation. Should be easy enough, nip into Boots, except they didn't have her usual colour and brand.

We then barely look at and discard virtually every brand of foundation in the shop based on her friend has the same brand and it's rubbish/it will make her look orange, all the while bitching and moaning about rubbish shops and what a shithole we live in for forty-five-fecking minutes! Hanging on to my last shreds of patience, I suggest we go to the No7 counter and do the colour match thing.

DD - are you dumb?
Me - ...or benefit?....what did you just say?
DD - piss off.

At which point I lose my rag. I don't shout, but tell her through gritted teeth not to be so rude and that she has 5 minutes to make her mind up or I would be leaving the shop and she could buy her own "bloody foundation"

This woman then steps between us, turns her back to me and puts her arm round DD and asks if she's OK? DD shrugged her off and said yeah, she was fine.

Woman then turns to me and starts giving me a lecture about how I should be kinder to my daughter, that one day she'll leave home and I'll regret being so nasty.

I cut her off, politely and said we were fine. She then called me rude and that I should be ashamed of myself and that I was being abusive to DD. So I said, we'd been in the shop for 45 minutes, I was fed up with DD's rudeness and if she thought she could do a better job, to be my guest. Woman then huffed a bit, repeated I was rude and abusive, then walked off.

I'm still really annoyed about it. I don't think I did anything wrong, I didn't shout or rant or anything like that.

Also, DD now thinks she's the bees knees as I got told off.

OP posts:

Gwenhwyfar · 15/03/2017 09:22

"It's a bit sad that a 15 year old is wearing foundation. "

Why supermoon. Did you see my post upthread? I had spots and dark under eye circles (permanent ones) at 15 and had as much use for foundation as I do now. Makeup wasn't allowed at school, but foundation and a bit of mascara passed under the radar.

manicmij · 15/03/2017 11:31

Your daughter is 15, that woman is mad physically holding a child like that, she could be charged for basically accosting a child. As to daughter's behaviour, why does she need foundation in the first place and given you seem to approve tell her to buy her own when she goes shopping by herself.

manicmij · 15/03/2017 11:36

Gwenhwyfar, you will know that makeup does nothing for spots and the dark circles under eyes would either be due to lifestyle or due to a particular physical condition that makeup will do nothing for other than to make that area look as if it is very "heavy".

Gwenhwyfar · 15/03/2017 11:56

manimj - A bit off topic, but foundation definitely helps with spots, particularly the scarring you get when a spot has burst. Dark circles under the eyes can be hereditary and makeup can help cover them up, not completely, but it does help.

checkin · 15/03/2017 13:32

Why the problem with foundation for a 15 year old?

My daughter and I spend lovely afternoons browsing boots/Superdrug counters together. If you think foundation looks heavy or orange, it isn't the right one. Choosing one with spf15 helps protect their skin in winter too so I actually recommend that my daughter wears it. She actually wears a tinted moisturiser but I would have no problem with foundation.

OP do you and your daughter normally tell each other to piss off? For me that would be unacceptable on all levels and there would be no way she would get anything. I suggest you stop focusing on this woman and start focusing on your daughter as it sounds like her sense of entitlement is way out of whack!

WankingMonkey · 15/03/2017 13:37

Wow, YANBU. That woman sounds like a fruit loop.

You were restrained with your DD...probably more so that I would have been. If my DD (shes only 4 now though so a while to go) told me to piss off whilst I was buying crap for her I would have taken her out of the shop and she would have got no foundation.

Quite why this woman felt the need to get involved is a mystery. I mean, if you had slapped your DD or something then yes, strangers should probably get involved. But for a few cross words (that your teenage daughter started!) definitely not.

LagunaBubbles · 15/03/2017 13:57

It's a bit sad that a 15 year old is wearing foundation. I barely wear it myself

So because you barely wear foundation you cant understand why someone else might want to?

Hissy · 15/03/2017 14:35

Please RTFT re the foundation supermoon! The child had bad acne and has scars. For this reason its understandable she wants some coverage

faithinthesound · 15/03/2017 18:17

Some people are so self absorbed. "It's not a problem for me, so I can't imagine why it might be a problem for someone else!" re: their apparent perfect skin and lack of need for foundation, and being unable to fathom that someone else might have different needs.

That said, if I'd spoken to my mother that way, not getting foundation bought for me would have been the least of my worries. My mother took no prisoners - I would have been sat on my backside in the middle of the store, and I would have been walking home.

My mother was not abusive, for the record - she was a lot of fun and absolutely the most loving mother imaginable. But there was a Line, and we did not cross it, because we knew better.

Zsuzsika · 20/03/2017 16:26

How Rude????? Who does she think she is getting involved like that? It must have been so embarrassing in front of your daughter but she obviously doesn't think about that! Ohh this made my blood boil, I don't think I would have been as nice and patient as you were, I would have asked her how is this her business?? Does she know your DD or you by any chance? And if not then simply don't get involved! I would have given her a mouthful!

doublesnap · 20/03/2017 16:31

*IMO you were being way TOO kind to her - I'd have thrown a tenner at her and gone and sat in Starbucks until she had finished her little diva strop, or told her to order it online!

The woman was being a rude and interfering busybody but you don't know her history - she might have lost her own DD, for example. She was being ridiculously unhelpful though.*

This

Huskylover1 · 20/03/2017 16:35

Your DD calls you dumb, and tells you to piss off? Seriously? She sounds like she needs some heavy discipline. What a madam!

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6