Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Dinner at 9pm.

194 replies

LookAtTheFlowersKerry · 11/03/2017 14:53

We are going out for dinner tonight as it's my sister's birthday.

The table is booked for 8.45pm. I'll be chewing my own arm off by then! We're meeting at 7.30 for drinks. So I'll be starving and probably pissed by the time we sit down to eat.

Am I just really out of touch? Is this how the world works now? Bearing in mind I'm usually in bed by ten.

Am I just an old fuddy duddy? Dsis is a hip young thing despite only being a year younger who has a vibrant social life. She says it's normal to eat that late and that I'm weird for always booking tables for 7pm ish.

Aibu?

OP posts:
onlyconnect · 11/03/2017 16:00

I was recently invited out for an evening with the table booked at 9.30 pm. Like you, I'm always in bed by ten. I was dreading it but there was no way out so I just went with it. In the event I had a really great time and it felt quite exciting to be out so late.

ElinoristhenewEnid · 11/03/2017 16:01

Eat dinner at 12 noon at home ideal for us. If going out for dinner in evening with family/ friends would never book for later than 7.30 pm preferably 6.30 pm. Going to bed on full stomach kills me with chronic indigestion

Imamouseduh · 11/03/2017 16:01

Normal.

PuppyMonkey · 11/03/2017 16:03

First glass of wine at 7.30 will immediately make you totally lose your appetite so don't worry OP.

228agreenend · 11/03/2017 16:03

9pm would be late for me as well, and I would definitely have some toast before going.

We tend to eat at 5-5.30pm midweek. The teens get in from school, me from work, then I cook and we eat. The cooking iand clearing up is all then done and dusted, and We then have an evening free to do homework, go to clubs, relax etc.

Alice212 · 11/03/2017 16:04

only "In the event I had a really great time and it felt quite exciting to be out so late."

oh. just to be sure I'm not misunderstood, I am often in a bar that late, I just don't like eating late.

Maybe I'm horribly jaded but I never know what is exciting about being out late, especially if you've got work the next day.

Hulababy · 11/03/2017 16:07

We are out tonight too - sitting options were 7 or 9. 9pm is just too early for us for an evening out, as prefer to go for a drink first and not feel like we have out be out of our seat for waiting guests. So 9pm it is. Would prefer middle ground at 8 really.

During the week at home we normally eat around 7- 7:30pm once DH is home from work.

I am sat here at the moment wondering whether to have a small snack - meeting friends at 7, so may need to have something in my stomach before I start drinking.

ClaryIsTheBest · 11/03/2017 16:09

Alice

Idk. I don't think you sound particularly jaded. Or if you are then so am I ;) I personally agree.

Work in my case usually doesn't start early (depends on the issues, clients etc). But I have been in the office at 4 and sometimes I stay until midnight.

Or have to go in on Sunday. I don't get it...

I prefer sleeping or spending time with DD or DH.

However, I don't think that 9 pm for a birthday party is very late.

Hulababy · 11/03/2017 16:11

Mind, having said that on a week day I do find 7:30pm a bit too late for me at times. I can't have a late lunch - school lunch hour is 12-1 so restricted. Its why I end up snacking tbh, which I have been trying to stop due to wanting to lose weight, But I prefer me, dh and dd to eat together - so have little choice.

Alice212 · 11/03/2017 16:11

hula "Would prefer middle ground at 8 really"

I think a lot of people would and a lot of restaurants know that but make more £ on 7pm and 9pm.

(sorry OP, totally overinvested while avoiding some chores....)

lavenderandrose · 11/03/2017 16:13

I go to bed when I'm tired. Some days that's nine o clock. I don't know why that's "childish". I do wake up very very early (not through choice) though.

Notso · 11/03/2017 16:22

9/9:30 is when I'd usually book. Surely you want to be really hungry before a meal. I tend not to eat anything all day to get the full benefit.

Hulababy · 11/03/2017 16:24

Thats true Alice. If they can get two sittings in its much better for them.

Notso - I can't eat if I get over hungry - end up feeling sick.

Sugarpiehoneyeye · 11/03/2017 16:31

I'd feel exactly like you do OP !
Just grit your teeth and crack on.
Yes, you probably will be as fresh as a daisy, by 9.00pm, but I bet you have a brilliant time 😄
Have a lay in, in the morning.

RB68 · 11/03/2017 16:32

just have a high tea at 4, ie a light tea and you will be fine. it will curb your appetite a bit and you can enjoy the evening meal instead of trying to throw it down your neck

diddl · 11/03/2017 16:40

"Unless they are getting up at 5 am it's a bit childlike IMO"

Or you might have an illness/be on medication that makes you tired.

hoddtastic · 11/03/2017 16:43

awaits onslaught of sick people taking offence where none was intended

obviously, if you have an illness/a new baby/a pregnant etc. then that's sort of exceptional isn't it? But for a grown woman, with no 'conditions' to be tucked up in bed by 9 I think it's strange. And common,across MN as I see it on threads, often.

felinewonderful · 11/03/2017 16:44

We eat at that time every night!

wowbutter · 11/03/2017 16:48

Oh god I can't think of anything worse!

I used to be part of that brigade, I ate at very nice restaurants at 9.30 and drank until 3am. Now, I am in bed, with a cup of decaf at 8pm, ready to sleep at 9!!

I do normally wake at 6 though.

Alice212 · 11/03/2017 16:49

hod, a lot of people will be up at 5 or 6. Also - sorry I have far too much knowledge of insomnia - it's quite common for people to sleep a couple of hours, then wake up and be up for a while...go back to sleep.

Sorry to keep on but it is one of my pet hates that some people with no sleep problems, health problems etc just think everyone can and should function as they do. It's not always possible. And what is childish about wanting to be in bed by 9pm? I suppose I'm childish too on the teen side for being in bed later than 1am?

one poster mentions not eating all day - I can't do that either - low blood pressure and low blood sugar. I could not have been a surgeon or a firefighter or whatever!

anyway OP, I hope you don't have any health problems and I hope you have fun and your sis has a good birthday.

domesticgoddesshaha · 11/03/2017 16:56

We have some friends abroad that we always see as a big group. Evening starts at about 8pm (at someone's house) and everyone is so busy catching up that the hosts somehow forget they are supposed to be cooking and dinner is normally served around midnight. By which time everyone is hammered except because I have an ebf baby who will be up several times during what remains of the night.
I have now learned that it is prudent to eat a substantial snack in the car on the way to their house Grin

hoddtastic · 11/03/2017 16:57

well, I average about 5 hours (broken) sleep- My poor sleep habits began when i had a chronically sick child.
None of my kids have slept before the age of 2 or 3.
I can keep saying 'I don't mean people with a condition of any sort or on meds' - what i mean is 'if i was married to someone who took themselves off to bed at 9 every night I'd be quite pissed off at picking up all the slack of ferrying any teens around alone and sitting, by myself staring at the screen, alone.'

I think I'd be looking for grown ups to hang out with :)

TheOnlyLivingToyInNewYork · 11/03/2017 16:57

I think people just find it odd to go to bed at 9pm. Or, as pp just said 8pm! My 1 year old isn't even in bed by 8pm! It seems like a really strange thing to do, and don't you want time for yourself of an evening, don't you have things to do?
I mean, whatever works for you, its nothing to do with me. I just find it really odd.

Alice212 · 11/03/2017 16:58

hod, you should have just said that! It is totally different!

spankhurst · 11/03/2017 17:00

9pm to me is night time, so weirdly late to eat. I get up early though. I like feeling empty when I go to bed, I hate having a full tummy when laying down.