People posting picture of their ill children

[Notsowifeymaterial]

So normally when I'm browsing on fb and see someone's posted a picture of their child on the sofa or in bed captioned aw my poorly baby 😢 I usually ignore it or if it's a friend I'll comment hope they feel better soon etc.
But yesterday someone on my friends list posted a picture of their child actually on a stretcher in the back of an ambulance captioned poor baby off to hospital. He's struggling to breathe.
I was imaging the scenario as this..
Paramedic - right ok we need to get this child to the hospital right now. Mum are you ready?
Mum - hang on can you just step back a sec whilst I take a photo.
Paramedic - umm.....
Mum - ok I'll just take one more so I can see which is best, ok got it. Hmm should I apply a filter. Which one will get me more likes do you think? shows paramedic the photos
Paramedic - um I'm sorry miss but we do really need to get to the hospital?
Mum - right of course. Let's go. Does the ambulance have wifi so I can post it on Facebook?
paramedic internally facepalms
BTW the child ended up being fine and is now home.
Aibu to think that that's just inappropriate for a mother to do?

Are those who are against photos of children when ill being posted online against all photos of children then? Or are you ok with the "cheery" parts of life being posted?

Personally, I'm totally against all of it. I don't think it's right to post a photo of anyone else online, without their permission.

Sirzy I have never put any pics of my children online. FB has no idea what they look like.

I send family pics via WhatsApp or Viber.

MrsDV I understand it's different for everyone, and I am all too aware of what happened with your dd, but to me, those polaroids of ds, when the docs told me he was very unwell, are not for anyone's viewings but mine and dh.

However, I loathe FB and do not, and will not, ever have an account. My privacy and security are important to me, and I don't want my information floating round the ether for ever.

Although I don't agree I can understand the view when it is no pics at all of the children.

I agree with Sirzy Scary. If you don't like sharing of any photos that is understandable.

I find the view what its ok to share photos of healthy children but not sick ones unsettling

A friend of a friend posted numerous pictures of her 7 year old son who is just beginning radiotherapy. Lying on the bed, with the horrible mask over his face, clutching his Superman teddy in fear, the whole lot.

Just...why the fucking fuck would you do that? It's not up to the parent to decide to share the most intimate and traumatic details of someone else's life, surely?

OFFS.
Stop judging your 'friend' first

You are projecting YOUR feelings of horror onto HER new life.
Do her a favour and keep well away. She needs real friends while dealing with childhood cancer.

My news feed is full of pictures of children having chemo and radio and various other procedures and I am honoured to share those moments. If its too much for you, look away. Stop pretending its about the child's autonomy.

I disagree strongly. Those masks are deeply distressing as they're molten hot and shrink on your face. I've seen people panic and try to claw them off. Not something that should be posted on FB without his permission, no way.

How do you know she didn't have permission?

......do you think she asked him before or after?

I think people have completely missed the point!

The op isn't saying it's bad to post pictures of your child in hospital for example, just why would you even think about taking a picture let alone posting it to fb when your child is in an emergency situation.

What is going through that persons head to think that's even remotely ok.

I have had a child taken to hospital in an ambulance because of a severe asthma attack. It would never occur to me to take a Picture of them in the ambulance or even fighting for breath in the hospital.

It's fine if child is then ok and sitting up smiling for the camera but as far as I'm concerned if they are in any sort of distress why are people taking pictures?

YANBU.

Just want, I think it's moved on from the OP. We are onto children with illnesses or disabilities being out of sight and out of mind. Well that's how it seems to me. With the exception of some posters who are not want all children off facebook (which is fair enough because it's not discriminatory)
I feel really uncomfortable with the repulsion at illness thing myself
Should people that require oxygen stay indoors?

elspeth if she asked his permission she would have said something along the lines of 'shall I put this picture on FB'
But with all your experience of having a child with cancer you could probably work that out for yourself.

I feel bad saying this but I had to unfollow one of my acquaintances I used to work with.

Her DD tragically has cancer and my heart goes out to her. I wish her well and sent messages offering any help if she needed it.

But she has turned her page into a blog of the journey.

Uploaded videos of the child having a severe reaction to treatment and literally beside herself and screeching in pain.

Pictures of admissions in the wee hours with febrile neutropenia.

Pictures of projectile spew after a general anaesthetic.

I cant imagine what she is going through but sometimes the child should be left to be ill in peace.

At one point she looked at the camera and yelled "what are you doing?"

So she gets it and wasnt impressed at being filmed.

but as far as I'm concerned if they are in any sort of distress why are people taking pictures?

You have a point but what people are doing on this thread is projecting their own fears and distress onto a photograph of a child they have not met or sometimes a photograph that they haven't even seen.

'If I was having a scan/radio/blood transfusion, I would be terrified'

Its not necessarily like that when you are a child with a chronic/long term condition. These things are as normal as going to the park is for other kids and other kids have photos of them at the park shared on FB.
But people don't cringe and turn away at the sight of a healthy, whole, not dying child.

But as a general rule....if your dc is in hospital on the mend and you want to let people know.

Fair enough post a picture and update.

As a general rule how about if you don't like pics of kids on social medis then don't put any on. And if you don't like people who post pics, don't have them on your social media.
But mind your own business what other people do, with their children. I don't know if I should have my kids permission to share photos of them, but I sure as shit don't need anyone elses.

I already said i unfollowed her.

Would you like photos of yourself screaming in pain in hospital on facebook?

No?

Dont do it to your children then.

Attention seeking rubbish fuelled by the need for FB likes. Not unlike the ones who put a status up only to follow up with further shite via PM only. Guaranteed attention for drama queens hooked on social media.

Some people are so shallow and simplistic that getting a few sympathetic Ooohhhs and Aaaaahs via social media actually really pleases them.

Really do not understand it myself, but there you go...

I have posted an update that I'm in hospital with a poorly DC - either "yawn minor emergency we'll be in A

When my DS was in ICU the last thing I thought of was of taking a picture of him tubed and sedated and uploading it to FB. The hospital did take a photo of him to show him when he woke up, but that was the only one taken.

When he was able to think of updating FB it was the last thing he wanted to do, so obviously we did the right thing.

Yanbu. It is hideous. We wouldn't do it to a parent, so why a child?

'Here is a video of my mother writhing in agony in hospital'. Never seen one of those. Wonder why...

I have no pics of my sons first six transfusions. On the seventh I though 'be nice to have a picture' I often go through my pics so wanted to add this part of our lives to the rich mosaic that is my phones gallery.

I don't tend to post them on Facebook though.