Sorry that this will be long, but ive been worrying since yesterday when DD came home from school.
It was a letter referring to DDs very low attendance at school, it says she will be monitored for three weeks and if no improvement is made then they will make a referral to EWO officer.
This is a fairly new school, and DD has had a lot of time off, but every single absence she has had has been completely unavoidable, that being said it has been a really unfortunate year,
The first four weeks of the school year DD went back to school and was constantly sent home for having tummy troubles. She complained of Diahorrea or pain and they would call me and send her home, which completely butchered any chances of having good attendance.
It got to the point where I had arranged with the school that I would go in and give painkillers, but she just couldnt keep coming home. I was constantly getting called from appointments to dispense painkillers, then sometimes go and collect her. it turned out to be friendship problems (i did take her to the drs several times about this)
Then there are the recurrent throat infections. she has had 9 throat infections in the past year. which has meant time off for appointments. its not always possible to get appointments after school, I dont tend to keep her off unless her condition is considered to be quite bad, IE fever/ not having slept because of her throat/ not eating.
then off the top of my head ive kept her off twice because of vomiting.
Then we moved in December, she attended her old school until the day they broke up for christmas. After the school holidays it took me a week to get the form for her to change school, proof of address and get her enrolled into a school. The form arrived at our house, the next day we viewed schools, the next day she started this current school.
Since starting this school she had a really bad throat infection which she had a few days off with, I got Dd ready for school and they refused her in because she had taken painkillers, they told me that she could come back once she no longer required painkillers. which was a further 3 days, so a week.
the 2 absences for sickness.
2 Drs appointments- both of which she had been given antibiotics to take.
1 funeral, which I took her out for half of an afternoon for.
Ive done all I can to ensure DD attends school. I send her in armed with antibiotics. I dont take her to Drs unnecessarily. Ive communicated with the school, and I think the fact that i made her available at a time that they thought she was too unwell shows this.
But ive now received this letter. It made me feel very much like they view it as im just not bothered to wake up and get DD to school, which is not the case.
If Dd is home from school we try to go onto learning websites and I try to ensure she reads more than she usually does. She tends to make her way through a book each week, like david walliams, Roald dahl, or wimpy kid.
How do I deal with this? I feel like ive been judged as a bad mum.
Ive written a letter explaining that I understand the implications of low attendance on both education and social paramaters, but these missed attendances have all been within the remit of their sickness procedures, Ive kept in contact with the school at all times, and I have even made DD available to return to school at times they deemed too soon.
Then to explain that the reason for many of DDs days off is that she has recurrent throat infections, which has required no less than 9 sets of antibiotics within the past 12 months, and if they would really like to support us in ensuring DD attends school more regularly that they might like to write a letter to GP/ ENT to explain the effect on DDs education and that the sooner they can get her tonsils out the better. Preferably before the start of the new school year.
Then to also say that whilst it wouldnt help to ensure that attendance goes up, but would ensure less educational struggles, if they could signpost me to where I can figure out what is best for me and DD to try and work through on the days that she is off.
Ive possibly taken this far too personally, and I may be too het up about this, but I really am quite offended. Ive sent them letters explaining exactly why DD hasnt been at school. they know that there are some medical issues. They give her antibiotics. so its not like im taking DD out of school for no reason.
Its just scary, and upsetting.
I dont know how to handle this. I just feel like theres an insinuation that I dont care about her education, when I really, really do.