To ask if step children are involved how your wills are written?

[Notyourusualfamilysetup]

Bit of a back story to me asking! Just me and dad for a long time, he got into a relationship when I was in my teens and they had my brother (his girlfriends only child). They moved an hour away when DB started school for him to go to a good private school and I stayed in my home town although still saw them regularly, my SM was lovely to me but haven't seen that much of her in recent years.

Sadly my dad died when my brother was quite young, he was a very wealthy man and left everything to SM (fair enough) she sadly passed recently and left everything to my brother.

She was a SAHM and the large inheritance that my DB now has was from my fathers very successful businesses and estates that he left to SM.

The money is not as much what bothers me, although believe me I could really use even a fraction of it. I would give all the money in the world to have my father back but I just wondered if this was a usual way of doing things?

It has left me wondering if my dad had just forgotten about me, him and SM were never married so as I understand he actively made his will this way.

So AIBU to ask, if you are not in a nuclear family and step children etc are concerned, what is the set up of your wills? Have you factored in all children?

Sorry it's a bit of a morbid questions really.

It does vary around the world. In France you cannot disinherit your children so if English people buy a French holiday home they need a separate additional French will for example. It is why England has large estates - eldest son inherits in the aristocracy where in France big estates get smaller and smaller as divided between all the children.

A case last year caused uproar when a disinherited daughter (she nad her mother seemed to hate each other and had not spoken for decades) persuaded a court under the 1975 Act as she was on state benefits even though she was adult she should get something from the estate.

here as said above it would only be the original father's will that might be challenged under the same rules.

in fact plenty of people believe all inheritance is morally wrong and we should have 100% gift and inheritance tax so all children start from the same basis (not my view but quite commonly held). Lots of parents choose to STKI - or something - "spending the kids inheritance" and plenty like my father spend their last penny on dementia care at home before dying.

So the only remedies here is either persuade the half brother to hand something over or see if claim could be made in relation to the father's (not the step mother's) will - unlikely as the poster is adult and it was a while ago.

I would certainly get a solicitor to investigate this.
If it can not be challenged, your step brother is not a nice man if he does not give you half a share.

I would certainly get a solicitor to investigate this

Investigate what? She cannot challenge the girlfriend's will and she seems to be about 20 years out of time to challenge the father's will. What precisely would the solicitor be looking into?

Sadly we have a system of freedom of testation and in 9 cases out of 10, there is nothing a disgruntled family member can do if they do not inherit what they expected.

You almost certainly can't resolve the past but your brother should be fixing the future

I think it would be worth seeing exactly what father and "stepmother"'s wills actually said - for the sake of emotional closure if nothing else.

If father's will stated "all to my darling girlfriend in the knowledge that she will do right by OP" then that would at least be a sign that he cared and would also offer some moral leverage if OP wanted to approach her halfbrother.

If "stepmother" had actually died intestate then that would let her off the hook to some extent (careless but not callous).

And although as PPs have said it's unlikely that a large estate like this has been wrongly distributed, it's not unheard of for things to have been mishandled, so for the sake of a letter it's worth checking.

I wish people who clearly know nothing about wills and can't even tell the difference between half brothers and step brothers would at least google before giving someone such poor advice.

I'm due to make one myself.
Dh will totally cut my children out so my will will have to put the house in trust until Dh leaves it or dies then it will get split between them all.

I think it would be worth seeing exactly what father and "stepmother"'s wills actually said - for the sake of emotional closure if nothing else

Fair enough, as long as she realises that it will be for emotional closure only, as she is likely to be way outside any limitation periods for making claims, even if the father's estate was wrongly distributed.

She can search for the will here gov.uk/search-will-probate and order a copy online for a small fee.

www.gov.uk/search-will-probate

sorry, here is the clicky link

What is the limitation period for a wrongly/fraudulently distributed estate? Of course if the perpetrator is dead that would make a difference.

JoffreyBaratheon although I don't know how old you and your step siblings were when your dad remarried, by thinking your dad shouldn't have split the equity equally, you are assuming he didn't treat his step children as his own. What if he loved them too as his own?

I brought practically nothing to my second marriage apart from my 2 children. Dh has 3. He is a wealthy man (built up during the course of our marriage). He has decided to split everything five ways after we have both gone. Why? Because he loves my kids and has taken them on as his own. No doubt his kids will one day be pissed off as I had less equity but that is frankly none of their business.

What is the limitation period for a wrongly/fraudulently distributed estate? Of course if the perpetrator is dead that would make a difference

I think it's 12 years from the date on which the right to receive the share accrued. That's under s 22(a) of the Limitation Act 1980. Again though, it's much more likely that the father cut his daughter out than the estate was wrongfully distributed.

Oh yes, way more likely that father deliberately or naively cut his daughter out, I was just curious.

How sad.

OP - have you had any conversations with your brother about this?

If you have a good relationship then it would be very cold of him to give you nothing knowing that you've been completely disinherited.

My mother has sat me down and explained to me how and why she and my step father are splitting things, her half of the house goes to her 3 children (my full brother, half sister and me) with provision for my step dad to live in and his half all goes to my half sister. When I was 18 I felt this was massively unfair that my brother and I would not have an equal share as our little sister, now I'm older I realise that it's not my house, it's not my money and they are at perfect liberty to divide it any way they see fit, and my sister is a lot younger than my brother and I. Yeah it hurts a bit that my step father (who raised me for half my life) won't leave anything to us but she is his only biological child and it's not unreasonable. I'm glad she let us know in advance how things lie so it's not a shock and we have had time to make peace with it, but to be honest I'm not stressing myself about how things will be divided when my parents die, it's honestly not something I want to think about.
That being said if my brother and I get cut out entirely I will be very very pissed, but it's not likely.

Frosty, that's disgusting in my view but I accept it is their choice to favour the younger child I suppose.

DH and I each have a now adult child from previous relationships

When we married we both changed our wills so that both DC will receive 50% regardless of who dies first. It was put together very carefully by our solicitor so that whichever one of us dies first, the one remaining cannot change the 50/50 split .. our solicitor called it 'the milkman clause'

Do they get 50% on the first death or only on the second parent death?

Frosty will you not inherit from your birth Father?

My dad says that him and his wife (step mother) have agreed to leave each other everything then split it all between 4 kids (2 each). However she hates me and my brother so it's unlikely to pan out that way.

If I'm honest it pisses me off cos she's never worked. It's very much his money but I don't think it'll be shared equally. They got together when we were adults so it's not a case of them regarding step kids as their own.

His choice though. It's good I know how it'll be and won't be hurt by it.

If I was the OPs brother I'd want to share the inheritance with her.

I don't think what frosty' mother and stepfather have done is unfair. The mother's estate is split between her children; the stepfather's between his. Presumably frosty also has a father so she will inherit from him too. The youngest sister only gets more because she'd be inheriting from both her parents.

DS2 is set to inherit 75% of our house and DS1 only 25%. But DS1 has a father whose estate he can expect to inherit. In fact, overall, DS1 looks set to inherit more overall than DS2.

I can't ensure absolute equality of inheritance for both boys but I can divide my estate equally between them.

I have two grown DC and 1 small one by a different father. My will makes ds and dd1 the guardians of dd2 and leaves enough life insurance to make that ok. Then when dd2 is adult everything is split 3 ways.
Though actually, I should probably rewrite to favour dd2, as dd1 and ds are earning enough to live on, and will probably inherit a chunk from their dad's family one day, whereas dd2's father -hasn't a pot to piss in-has few assets, and has 3 other grown children.
OP, I'm guessing your father's priority, having 'launched' you as it were, was to provide for his dependents, but yes, it's unfair.

This court from two years ago may be of interest:

www.theguardian.com/money/2015/jul/31/disinheritance-and-the-law

"Presumably frosty also has a father so she will inherit from him too."

Unless frosty's father has done the same as op's! Or spent it on care fees. Or scarpered when frosty was 2 and is no longer in frosty's life. Or gambled it away. Or is leaving it to charity. Presume not, where inheritance is concerned!

Our wills are made so that the home we are living in will belong solely to the remaining spouse, along with a lump sum.

The assets of the first spouse to die will be placed in a form of Trust (sorry I can't recall the exact wording), which the remaining spouse will receive interest from but they cannot dispose of the assets (this applies to bank accounts as well). This is to prevent 'the milkman clause' as it protects the child who's parent dies first, from subsequently being written out of a Will.

We have some rental properties, which again would go into the Trust, but the remaining spouse would receive any profits but cannot dispose of the property.

On the death of the remaining spouse everything is then split 50/50.

I know this might be unfair to the child who's parent dies first, but this is what happens in regular families, which is what we wanted. It is also relevant that we have been together since our children were under 5 (they are now 25) and any money/assets we have are what we have earned together.

Can't recall the exact wording without checking, but this is roughly how it works