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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think DD's punishment from PE teacher was draconian?

867 replies

moonlightshadow1 · 01/03/2017 17:15

DD is in Year 10 and came home quite annoyed about a punishment she got in PE for something very minor in the first place. Her teacher made her get changed into her PE kit at lunchtime (without any tracksuit in the cold wet weather), and run laps around the football pitch for all but the last 15 minutes of the break (so she could eat), much of it whilst the boys were having football practice, who apparently found it quite funny. Is it overreacting to think this is a bit out of order? I might not have been surprised when I was at school but I can't help be a bit annoyed, seems a bit like it was intended to embarrass her and unnecessary.

OP posts:
PlumsGalore · 02/03/2017 18:46

seriously I would have told my DD that is what she gets when she answers back. if it was so awfully painful and distressing for her then she wont do it again will she?

FrancisCrawford · 02/03/2017 18:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Verbena37 · 02/03/2017 18:49

A school policy for discipline would usually their sanctions for different types of misbehaviour. It seems very unlikely that he gave her that punishment (lunchtime detention) without having warned her first. She would then have had to carry on misbehaving and ignoring his previous warning to warrant giving her a lunch detention.

If he just gave the detention without a warning (unlikely) then he isn't being fair. A year 10 deserves a warning but should then be mature enough to listen to it and not carry on messing about.

TBH, making her run was probably because she is quite a sporty girl....rather than making her sit and do homework. He perhaps thought she would prefer to run instead.
Perhaps she won't misbehave in future.

Original poster
moonlightshadow1 · 02/03/2017 19:00

The second telling off in the class wasn't entirely her own fault. She made a silly, immature comment in the first place, got told off, made another silly comment and so she was told to sit by the side, fine. She was told to sit cross-legged so she did, but after a while just uncrossed her legs for a bit, whilst staying where she was told, and the teacher stopped the lesson to tell her off again and "how did I tell you to sit?" I don't see that not keeping her legs crossed is a terrible case of not doing as she was told?

She was then made to run laps, again, fine, in the context of PE, but as tracksuit is part of her PE kit there's no reason she shouldn't have been allowed to put it on. She's body conscious as many teenagers are, running around with teammates or in the context of a match is different to clearly being punished on your own by boys who are doing something completely different together.

OP posts:
Original poster
moonlightshadow1 · 02/03/2017 19:02

Gardenflowergirl they were lining up to start PE and she made a silly comment rather than lippy but agree she was in the wrong, especially for then making another immature one following on from it having been told to be quiet. I agree teachers need to do something if a pupil disrupts in any way.

OP posts:
thatdearoctopus · 02/03/2017 19:04

So, your daughter misbehaved and you acknowledge that a punishment is in order - but only according to your own terms?

Sorry, it doesn't work like that.

SookiesSocks · 02/03/2017 19:05

The body conscious line was inly trotted out much later in the thread OP. You originally said it was due to warmth.

Best way to solve all this is to ask the teacher!

Why oh why are you only taking the word of a lippy badly behaved teen?
Why wont you contact the school and ask what happened?
Is it because you fear that your DD may have glossed over a few details?

Strongmummy · 02/03/2017 19:06

She's 14 so old enough to understand consequence. She was rude, the teacher did their job. Sounds like a tough punishment but hopefully means she won't be daft enough to be rude again! I'd tell your daughter to sort out her attitude to be honest

Original poster
moonlightshadow1 · 02/03/2017 19:07

SookiesSocks she wanted to wear tracksuit as she thought it was cold outside, she didn't know exactly where she'd have to run about at that time, I'm just saying a teacher should be aware of those potential issues.

OP posts:
eddiemairswife · 02/03/2017 19:09

As we only have your daughter's side of the story we can't be sure we have the whole truth. The OP has admitted her child is lippy. I would suspect that heavy sighs and rolling of the eyes come into it too, and still can't understand why it is so difficult for a healthy 14 year old to sit cross-legged for 45 mins.

SookiesSocks · 02/03/2017 19:10

Why would they be aware? Your DD runs around a hockey pitch in hocky kit. Usualky a skirt or shorts. Why would the teacher think your DD has body issues when wearing a PE kit which is the same as hockey kit?

Original poster
moonlightshadow1 · 02/03/2017 19:12

eddiemairswife I expect rolling of the eyes and an exasperated sound or two was involved too, she's a teenage girl so it wouldn't surprise me even if I disapprove of attitude to adults, especially a teacher. I think having a go in front of the class again and asking her "and how did I tell you to sit" was a bit needless for simply uncrossing her legs, it can get uncomfortable in the same position for a long length of time.

OP posts:
shinysinkredemption · 02/03/2017 19:14

My DD, a similar age, is appalled to hear about what your DD had to go through.
However I'm afraid I agree with people who say that talking back or being disruptive in class is disrespectful. The punishment seems harsh but perhaps it is persistent behaviour or your daughter is being made an example of. Either way, if she hadn't been talking she wouldn't have been running around that field.

MaisyPops · 02/03/2017 19:19

EveningShadows Seconded. I'd absolutely love to see all the posters who want to undermine teachers and tell their little darlings they can choose if and when to behave try to teach a class of 33 teenagers for an hour.

... or better still, when their precious little dears are behind from ongoing poor behaviour I hope that those parents now dont start asking for revision classes, intervention etc and try to suggest that poor results are the teachers fault. Usually the most demanding parents for intervention are the ones who make excuses for their kifs further down the school

Original poster
moonlightshadow1 · 02/03/2017 19:19

Thanks for your post shinysinkredemption. Very interesting to hear what your DD, a girl of a similar age thinks of it and that she's appalled at it. Shows it's quite reasonable to consider what it could make a teenage girl feel, I think. I agree about talking back. Her initial comment was silly but not talking back as such, then she made another immature one. Rightly dealt with but interesting to hear what your DD thinks.

OP posts:
crystalgall · 02/03/2017 19:19

I honestly cannot understand the fact that someone said removing a child from the learning environment was horrible. Wtf Confused

What the bloody hell are we supposed to do with lippy gobby rude disruptive kids?

Does anyone have any idea what it's like to teach 30 14 year olds? Just cos you have ONE doesn't make you an expert on teens. I have taught nearly a thousand now (took some time trying to add that up!).
Low level disruption is the worst. Nothing too horrible nothing too rude just constant off task chatting, talking over you, chatting when they should be working in groups etc. Thankfully I don't get that much in my classes. I am 'extra' and 'super harsh' according to my kids and rule with an iron fist. I have to otherwise they would walk all over me.

But if my kids were asked I think and hope (and I know from some student surveys) they would say 'miss is harsh. She's strict. We can't do anything in her lessons. But she's a good teacher, we learn lots and I've done well this year.

Sorry but teens smell weakness and fear and will exploit that in a second. Even the nice ones. Why wouldn't they? They're only kids wanting to have fun. Is our job to reign that in in the classroom.

I have always removed kids from seats/classroom/placed in another room. That's pretty standard practice.

Some people including OP seriously have no idea what the job entails.

If everyone behaved like your daughter can you not see the chaos that would ensue. She was silly and immature blah blah but if 30 kids were like that there would be no lesson and no learning. Take her behaviour seriously. I do. Everyday in the classroom.

EveningShadows · 02/03/2017 19:22

Maisy, but they are generally the same parents IME - everyone else's child is in the wrong but THEIR child is different Angry.

OP, as has been emphasised again and again and again and again we only have your DD's side of the story.

I would love to hear the other side.

My guess is your DD is massively minimising everything she did and hugely exaggerating everything the teacher did.

I've seen it so many times.

FrancisCrawford · 02/03/2017 19:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EveningShadows · 02/03/2017 19:24

Hear hear crystal.

Original poster
moonlightshadow1 · 02/03/2017 19:26

EveningShadows I believe I've got the full story over last night and this evening. I made it clear I wanted to know everything that'd happened as I'd soon be talking to her form tutor anyway, so she told me exactly what was said and what happened so I think I now know.

FrancisCrawford she got huffy in the lesson as she was embarrassed (but got herself into the situation), then yes at having to run laps but she could have been punished by running laps around a vacant pitch.

OP posts:
Chickenkatsu · 02/03/2017 19:30

I think that some posters seem to be confusing school with the army...

SookiesSocks · 02/03/2017 19:35

Good point Francis about the tracksuit.

OP what exactly did you want from this thread?
You have made so many excuses why DD was hard done by and the teacher who has to deal with your lippy teen is wrong.

End of the day the teacher gives out punishments for bad behaviour. As long as they are not torture then you should accept it.

You are blindly accepting what your in trouble child is saying and blaming the teacher yet you are reluctant to find out from them what happened. Why?

FrancisCrawford · 02/03/2017 19:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SookiesSocks · 02/03/2017 19:38

Whys that Chicken ?
Do you think naughty children should be allowed to disrupt a class? That they should be prasied for bad behaviour? Not given punishments at all?

In the army if you are lippy to your commanding officer you get a stronger punishment than laps. And usually a kicking from your peers for bringing down the squad. So nothing like the army really.

user789653241 · 02/03/2017 19:38

I don't think some of us posters and you can never get to the mutual understanding and agreement, op, unless you actually find out what is the teachers' version of this events.

We are not sure what your dd says is 100% accurate or not. You seem so unhappy about how she was treated. So, why don't you at least try to find out by talking to the teacher? You can do so without being accusatory manner?