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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask your opinions on school reunions

123 replies

JungleInTheRumble · 01/03/2017 02:24

School reunion is coming up. I can't go so it's a bit of a moot point really but I was interested how everyone else felt about these.

The people I like from school I have stayed in touch with - the only reason I'd go is to be nosy and see what everyone is doing (although with fb that's not hard to do...). I guess it could be a networking opportunity?

Did any of you re-connect with high school people at a reunion and end up being friends?

OP posts:
SerialReJoiner · 01/03/2017 12:33

I would have to fly across the Atlantic to go to mine. To visit with people I haven't spoken to in almost 20 years. Nah.

N21mummy · 01/03/2017 12:34

Nope. But OH and I went to same school in same year, so I'd make him go to get the gossip anyway :-)

TheSecretMrsFairbrother · 01/03/2017 12:37

Oh dear God no. I'd rather have a smear test, root canal and colonic irrigation simultaneously whilst Mrs Browns Boys plays on a big screen.

I'm not keen on the idea if that's not obviousWink

winterinmadeira · 01/03/2017 12:38

Oh no definitely not! I'm still close to some of my school friends but those days are gone and in the past for a reason.

londonrach · 01/03/2017 12:39

Some of my yeAr tried to organise one. Wasnt going to go and seemed no one else wanted to. Some things are best left in the past.

MadMags · 01/03/2017 12:43

Fuck no! Can't think of much worse.

MyBreadIsEggy · 01/03/2017 12:44

I would rather walk over broken glass.
My high school years were miserable thanks to racist bullies. I had a few close friends who I'm still in touch with and see regularly, but other than that, school is buried at the back of my mind.
From what I hear, all the horrible, bitchy girls who made my life hell are all still together in their sad little clique Hmm

Whathaveilost · 01/03/2017 12:48

I hate the idea of them,have never been and wouldn't go even if I was invited!
My friend on the other goes to regular school reunions but I can't see the point because they all know each other, , kids go to the same school, are friend on FB and everyone lives in the same small Northern market town!
Pointless!

LadyFlumpalot · 01/03/2017 12:49

I wouldn't bother. I went to one. It was as if I left the confident, articulate woman I am at the door and regressed straight back to being the gawky, nervous, terribly shy teenager I was. It was awful. Lasted an hour.

theshitcollector · 01/03/2017 12:56

Part of me would love a reunion (the internet didn't exist when I left school and it would seem odd to try to friend people I haven't seen for nearly 30 years on facebook now).

However, I suspect that too many of the people who attend would either be the 'popular' gang trying to re-live the days when everyone else was in awe or people who think they have been more successful than expected wanting to show off about it. I've actively avoided the former for years and whilst I sympathise with the latter it's not exactly my idea of a good night out.

AristotlesTrousers · 01/03/2017 13:01

I couldn't go to a reunion whether I wanted to or not, because the boy who sexually assaulted me several times and forced me to give him a blow job, then spent the whole year slandering me and making sure I was completely ostracised and pushed out of school turned up to the last one.

Was furious, especially as I'd blocked him on Facebook because I find anything to do with him massively triggering, but he wasn't tagged in all the photos. There's another reunion in a couple of months and I keep having fantasies of exposing his misdemeanours on the event's FB page, although I'd never do it. Doesn't stop me wanting to though. God, I'd love to see him get his comeuppance! Angry Sad

maddiemookins16mum · 01/03/2017 13:05

Never have, never will attend. I have about three friends from school I still know (and we get together over wine once or so a year). The only reason I would attend is to see if the twin 14 year old brothers who made my life a misery in 1979 are there and I'd tell them that what they did (dog poo in my school bag) and the names they called me have never left me and I hope to God if they have kids it was never done to them.

Topseyt · 01/03/2017 13:11

I wouldn't bother now, even though I would be curious to know how some people are doing, the few I haven't managed to trace on FB, and there are some.

I left school with the sixth form of 1984 though, so it really actually feels like it must have been in another lifetime now.

Sometimes I wonder if there are any of us on here, with grown up (or nearly) children. Perfectly possible, and we probably just wouldn't know it.

Chattymummyhere · 01/03/2017 13:15

Nope I wouldn't go to mine and dh didn't go to his last month.

If I wanted those people in my life they would be.

AYankinSpanx · 01/03/2017 13:24

HRHCocoa, did you go a school reunion in an 80's movie or something? Grin

I live a long way from my school now but probably wouldn't cross town to go to one, never mind oceans. I don't do Facebook either, so whatever everyone's up to can just remain a mystery to me!

habibihabibi · 01/03/2017 13:31

Never!
They undoubtely say, that bitch habibi is a snob and thinks she is better than us and they would be right .

incredibule · 01/03/2017 13:34

Never go back. Everything will be smaller and more boring than you remember, and that's just the boys. Smile

5foot5 · 01/03/2017 13:36

I think it depends how long since you left.
The longer the better!!

Just after I got engaged to DH he had a 10 year reunion to which partners were invited. We went with some of the good friends he had kept in touch with and their OHs. It was pretty awful. OK, I didn't expect to know anyone but DH found it grim too.

Apart from his close friends, who were lovely, most people seemed to be intent on bragging about how much they earned, how successful they were, what car they were driving - yadda, yadda. DH at the time was doing very well in his career (and had just got engaged to me Grin) but he has never been in to that sort of macho, willy-waving that seemed to be the object of the evening for most people.

Anyway, for that reason when a 25 year re-union was planned for my school I initially wasn't keen. I no longer lived in the area and had kept in touch with very few people. However, one of the women organizing it was an old friend and she rang me up to see if I was going and we ended up chatting for ages so I agreed to ho.

It was actually pretty good. I think the difference is that by 40-something most people have got over themselves a bit. We nearly all have had a few setbacks, a good dose of real life and nobody seemed intent on bragging and parading their wonderful life in front of everyone else. It was just a pleasant friendly evening. All the women told each other they hadn't changed a bit (manifestly untrue!) and tried to recognize which of these middle-aged, slightly balding fellows were the skinny, long-haired 16 year olds we remembered from the 1970s.

WhatchaMaCalllit · 01/03/2017 13:39

No. Wouldn't go if it were a reunion of the people I was in secondary school with. They were horrible to me so I can see no reason why I'd want to be in a room with them.
Primary school - I'd love to meet up with my friends that I've lost touch with from there. I have no idea where they are now and what they're up to but I was really good friends with two girls who ended up going to different secondary schools to me so that's how I lost touch with them. Did try to stay in touch but it didn't work out.

littlepooch · 01/03/2017 13:46

No. I didn't hate school but I didn't love it and for me it's the past. I figure if I wanted to stay in touch with people then I would have done. I'm an introvert anyway and the thought of having to go somewhere like that and field a load of questions fills me with horror!

thetemptationofchocolate · 01/03/2017 14:50

Littlepooch I think we are long-lost twins as I second every word you just said. I was going to type a reply but you've said it all already :)

lidoshuffle · 01/03/2017 14:58

I've been to a few in the 40 years since leaving school. Each time a few more girls turn up so they are still evolving. Everyone's loved them and they've been such fun.

I suppose I'm lucky to have gone to a school with great girls (never any bullying etc) who have grown up into great women. The reverse is probably equally true; mean girls, mean women.

PageStillNotFound404 · 01/03/2017 15:21

I'd rather eat someone else's toenails after they've run a marathon in week-old socks.

gabsdot · 01/03/2017 15:45

I left school 30 years ago and have zero interest in what my old teachers and school mates are doing now plus my life isn't that facinating.

morningconstitutional2017 · 01/03/2017 17:01

I've never been to one. I remember how unhappy and spotty I was as an adolescent and how thoroughly unloveable and unloved I felt with bad hair. I want no reminders of those awful times. Obviously most of that bad stuff was really in my head but even so, nothing would induce me to go to them.

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