Surname after marriage

[VivienneWestwoodsKnickers]

I'm getting married in August. I used to be in the police where it was common for women to take their husband's name (if they wanted to of course) and use that for their personal life but maintain their "maiden" name for work purposes.

This created a split between work and personal life to protect their family privacy.

I'm no longer in the police and was toying with the idea of still doing this, but there's no real "need".

WIBU to ask whether you kept your name, adopted your partners name, selected a new surname together or now use different names for parts of your life?

[Topseyt]

I took DH's name. That was 24 years ago.

I don't regret it and like it as our family surname. At the time it didn't occur to me to question it, but if I were getting married today I probably would be more likely to keep my own name.

[Blueroses99]

Took my husband's surname. I like feeling that the name ties us together as a family.

Our heritage is non-British and (before I changed my passport) we had plenty of awkward moments in our respective countries being married with different names, including being refused double hotel rooms!

[MrsJayy]

I changed my name to dh i had my stepdads name and my biodads name before that both given to me both useless men i wanted to choose my own surname.

[IckleWicklePumperNickle]

Took DH surname.

[LellyMcKelly]

Kept my name. Couldn't see any reason to change it when my own had done me perfectly well for 32 years. I'd also published in my own name, and was more easily findable online and on social media (useful for my work) using the name I'd also always used. Can't see any point faffing round with public/private names.

[fakenamefornow]

I kept my name, husband kept his name, children are double barreled. Married 20 years now.

I've never met a woman who regretted keeping her own name or giving her children her name. Loads regret changing it though and giving children just the dad's name.

[Leggit]

Kept my name. Kids have mine. Very glad of that now many years later on the point of divorce. why? if they had their dads name he would still be their dad? Just because you are divorcing doesn't mean they would need to lose their identity. I never understand the changing your child's name to suit your relationship stair thing though.

I have DH name, I wanted it and I will always keep it regardless of what happens in our futures. I have had my now name longer than any other (my mother gave me my stepdads then I reverted to my bio dads as a teen) and i want to keep it always. It's not just my husbands name; it's also mine.

[MiddleClassProblem]

I took DH's name as I wanted to have a united name and my surname is one that is tricky to pronounce and spell so a pita in day to day life whereas his is straight forward. However I'm considering writing and if it got taken on I would have my maiden name as my author name as it feels more "me".

[Leggit]

*relationship status

[NoArmaniNoPunani]

We kept our own names. Ds is myname-hisname.

[stitchglitched]

I will be keeping my name when DP and I marry, and the DC have my surname. DP says he wants to take my name so we all share a family name.

[TurnipCake]

Getting married this year, keeping my name. Most women from my parent's country of origin keep their names on marriage.

OH asked whose surname our children would have, I'm very close to my maternal grandparents so they'll have their surname as a middle name (as much as I hate to think it, my grandparents won't be around forever) and OH's surname, not double-barrelled.

[honeylulu]

Kept my name. Always intended this even from childhood. The tradition arose from women originally having no legal identity - they were chattels passed from father to husband with the name change signifying change of ownership. I find that repulsive.
Our children have both names with the option to drop one at secondary age.
Husband has occasionally moaned about us not sharing a name. My retort is that he is welcome to change his name to mine.

[NameChange30]

fake
"I've never met a woman who regretted keeping her own name or giving her children her name. Loads regret changing it though and giving children just the dad's name."
Yup

[ZacharyQuack]

Neither of us changed our names.

[Bobcat15]

Kept my maiden name for work. In personal life I've taken husbands surname but made my maiden name a middle name rather than go down the hyphen route. Both my kids have my maiden name as one of their middle names too.

[nokidshere]

I took my husbands name 30 yrs ago but would do so again if I was getting married today. we did discuss him changing his name to mine also but in the end I decided to go with his.

Our children also have the same name.

[Ice3]

We chose a new surname together.

[pinkmagic1]

I kept my name. I felt strongly from being a young child that it was my name and if I ever married there was no way I was changing it. As it happened I married a man from a culture were women do not change their names anyway so there was no pressure.

[Miscella]

Nothing would persuade me to take anyone else's name. Dh didn't consider changing his either - and I wouldn't have agreed even if he had wanted to take mine. I really don't get the name changing thing.

[honeyroar]

I kept my maiden name for work until my passport expired (8 yrs later) then changed it. It had got really confusing by then and I'm glad to have one name for everything. It's shorter - easier for form filling - I'd have hated to have double barrelled it!

[Willyoujustbequiet]

Leggit because he became very violent and abusive and neither the kids nor myself want any link to him whatsoever.

I havent changed anything to reflect my relationship status. By keeping my own name and ensuring the kids had mine I've done the exact opposite of that.

[Lessthanaballpark]

I kept my name because I wanted to keep the same name as my mum. She's a lovely person.

[TheresABluebirdOnMyShoulder]

I took DH's name and used it for both work and personal stuff. It was important to us both to have the same name as each other and future DC. My name wasn't a very nice one and his is lovely so that was it really. Plus, his business is named after him and he had built a reputation professionally. It also would have been expensive to change the company name, livery, stationery etc.

[EurusHolmesViolin]

You took your FILs name in place of your dad's squidgey, by that token.