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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To change nursery because of menu options

304 replies

Confusedwithcake1 · 23/02/2017 17:11

So I'm returning to work soon and my LO will attend the local nursery for 2 days a week when 11months old. When I chose the nursery I was happy with the care, location etc and at the time I was happy with the menu options.

Fast forward now and I've looked at the menu options and now I think I want to look for a new nursery. Specifically because they serve cake as a pudding (wasn't on previous sample menu)

Don't get me wrong I love cake and know that LO will eat cake at parties but I was just hoping that a nursery setting would provide something less junkie.

My DH thinks it's fine as it's only 2 days a week but I'm not so sure as it seems unnecessary for a 11month old.. so aibu to try and find a new nursery based on one sample menu that lists cake as a pudding?

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 23/02/2017 17:21

What as this is the only option and your 11 month old has to eat it? Then yes move him. But if it's just one of other options or you can say no don't give it to him, then you're being beyond unreasonable. He's 11 months old, he's hardly going to argue he wants cake.

khajiit13 · 23/02/2017 17:22

Just ask them to offer fruit instead. If it's only served twice a week and she's only there twice a week then she likely miss out on it anyway.

ChishandFips33 · 23/02/2017 17:22

If everything else is great then no...likelihood is you'll end up compromising on something else elsewhere

Just ask if your LO can have something else (and be willing to provide it if needed) or a tiny portion of what they offer

If it's offered twice a week, is it the same days each week and are they your days?

Lugeeta · 23/02/2017 17:22

Just tell them to give him fruit instead. I did this and it was never an issue, lots of parents requested the same, especially for under 2's.

early30smum · 23/02/2017 17:22

Lots of children at my nursery have a note in their file to say no sweet puddings, and they get offered fruit instead. Your nursery should be able to offer this option. As others have said, the portion she will get will be very very small and it won't (or shouldn't!) be every day.

Hatemylifenow · 23/02/2017 17:23

I genuinely don't even think I looked at the menu when I chose DS's nursery, I just looked for kind staff who gave cuddles, and settled kids.

Basicbrown · 23/02/2017 17:25

If it really bothers you then tell them/ ask them to give him fruit. There will undoubtedly be other stuff that you feel that you have to raise over the next few years. This is pretty minor really and easily sorted.

crazywriter · 23/02/2017 17:26

YABU.

While you want to stop the junk, 2 bits of cake a week (if that) aren't going to do any damage. You realise that telling children they can't have something makes them.more determine to scoff the lot when they have the chance? Cake isn't a treat. It can be added to a healthy and balanced diet. If there's nothing wrong with the rest of the food and you don't have junk at hoes, what the he'll is wrong with a bit of cake 2 days a week. It's not like they'll have the whole lot.

But if you want to be that mum who stops their kid from enjoying all bits of food go ahead.

We don't have junk every day but we'll have a slice of cake, cookies, etc once or twice a week because it's something to look forward to and stops our girls from viewing refined sugars as treats to reward themselves with or gorge on when they can. Nothing isn't allowed in our house but it's all about moderation.

Astro55 · 23/02/2017 17:26

Plenty of cakes involve fruit -

Lots are made with honey or syrup etc - think you'll have better thing to worry about probably more sugar in a yogurt

EsmesBees · 23/02/2017 17:26

Maybe look into what the cake actually is. They serve 'cake' at our nursery, but it's nothing that I would define as cake, basically baked mushed bananas and dates. Some parents at ours do request fruit only, but I feel sorry for these kids who have to watch the others getting desserts.

OhhBetty · 23/02/2017 17:27

at 11months is it really necessary? no but it's not a necessary food for any age group! It's just nice to have sometimes. Can I ask if you have food issues? As it seems like a huge overreaction if everything else looks good.

OhhBetty · 23/02/2017 17:27

As in the staff and standard of care etc.

Hatemylifenow · 23/02/2017 17:28

I'm calling PFB.

BretonTop · 23/02/2017 17:29

You're being ridiculous. Just say you would prefer she was offered fruit or plain yoghurt only for the time being. Offer to provide it if they don't. My friend did this (I just let my eldest ds have whatever, he's now 6 and not obese).

mumeeee · 23/02/2017 17:30

Sorry another person saying Yabu. They only offer cake twice a week and as your Dd is only going to nursery 2 days a week she might not even be there when they have cake. Even if they do have cake on the days she's there a small portion won't harm her.
I'm sure other nurseries would offer cake as well.
If you really don't want her to have it just send your own pudding in or ask them not to give her pudding.

Onwithnumber2 · 23/02/2017 17:30

I'm quite surprised so many people think YABU, I actually think like you, that cake has a place at parties or Sunday lunch with grandma but as a special treat not just because it's lunch time on a weekday Confused
And no, it won't hurt them but it does (to me) seem to start off a dodgy habit of expecting cake at lunchtime.
If you're all otherwise happy with the nursery I would stay put, but specify you'd prefer a healthier pudding offered for your LO.

TinselTwins · 23/02/2017 17:31

OP are you thinking a huge triangular wedge of chocolate fudge cake like you have in costa for an adult? It'll be a wee sliver of tray bake - good for kids going through food refusal stages who haven't eaten anything else all day to at least encourage them to eat something. At 11 months you're still at that stage where you can feed them organic brocolli and steamed fish and they'll eat it up for you, in the next 6 months time you'll probably be lowering your standards to just anything you can get in them so they don't starve! you just haven't hit that phase yet, when you do, you'll get the cake thing!

Confusedwithcake1 · 23/02/2017 17:32

Looking at these responses I'm surprised tbh. I thought nurseries offered fruit, yoghurt etc which I know have lots of sugar but are considered a bit healthier.

I guess I constantly see people talking about sugar being awful and going sugar free that I thought I wasn't being U. I also see posts about people not being allowed these types of food at school so thought it would be the same in a nursery.

Also for what it's worth I love cake and it will be part of LO diet at some point I'm sure. I'm not that precious about food but I guess it just was a bit of a surprise.

OP posts:
Astro55 · 23/02/2017 17:33

So 2 days cake 5 days fruit and the outcome will be an expectation of cake?

How does that work?

gameofchance · 23/02/2017 17:33

Just wait until you hit age 3/4 and your DC refuse to eat anything you cook / treat broccoli like it is a toxic substance and ask for sausages or pasta all the time

Hatemylifenow · 23/02/2017 17:33

that cake has a place at parties or Sunday lunch with grandma but as a special treat not just because it's lunch time on a weekday

I disagree; I think seeing certain food as "treats" contributes to overeating and disordered thinking about food.

Confusedwithcake1 · 23/02/2017 17:34

Yes PFB Blush

OP posts:
BalletZeus · 23/02/2017 17:35

Ridiculous! Totally unreasonable!

It's most likely 'healthy cake.'

You do realise by the time they are at school, they'll be guzzling haribo and fruit shoots like all the other kids?!!

Hatemylifenow · 23/02/2017 17:35

Mine is my PFB too but I'm blasé about food because my mum wasn't with me and I don't have a good relationship with it as a result.

Crumbs1 · 23/02/2017 17:36

Carrot cake is a vegetable isn't it? Lemon drizzle is most definitely fruit.

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