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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Is it unreasonable to beep your horn when someone is up your arse?

65 replies

Penrithtearooms · 21/02/2017 21:44

Would they get the hint?

Not that I would have the guts. But is it a thing people do?

Doesn't happen often, but it did today. I drive to the speed limit. I don't ever speed up or slow right down, just angrily flick them out of sight and glare through my rear view mirror...and seethe silently.

OP posts:

CovtilIdie · 21/02/2017 21:46

I don't think so, I would always assume that anyone beeping was doing so at someone in front of them...

Autumnchill · 21/02/2017 21:47

Nope, best to wash your windows again and again and again.....they soon get the message

dementedpixie · 21/02/2017 21:47

Just slow down to piss them off more

Original poster

Penrithtearooms · 21/02/2017 21:53

Ha. I did slow down to let someone cross the road.

What if they have a medical emergency? Which is why they are driving like this?

I almost beeped, but they turned the other way at the junction :( spoiled my rebellious moment.

OP posts:

Thewolvesarerunningagain · 21/02/2017 21:54

No that won't help. The best advice I've heard is to gradually increase the distance between you and the vehicle in front of you so that the vehicle behind can overtake if they choose and to give you more reaction time as it's easy to be distracted when being tail gated. Otherwise there is nothing you can do really. It's aggravating but best to keep yourself safe rather than inflame the impatient jerks and end up in a crash.

justilou · 21/02/2017 21:54

I have stopped, opened up the hatch and with very dramatic hand signals offered for them to get in...

justilou · 21/02/2017 21:54

Also - if it is day time, turning on your lights often makes them think you are braking.

Sychnant · 21/02/2017 21:56

I turned on my hazards last time someone tailgated me. They backed off very quickly :D

whatsthecomingoverthehill · 21/02/2017 21:58

I slow down. The closer they get the slower I go. If they do hit me because they're tailgating I'd rather they did so at a slower speed.

PebbleInTheMoonlight · 21/02/2017 21:59

What if they have a medical emergency? Which is why they are driving like this?

You'd know. Every person I came up behind like a bat out of hell when I thought my husband was dying moved instantly. It must have been written all over my face that I wasn't an arsehole, I was desperate!

(Husband survived thankfully)

Handling the genuine arseholes that do this, just make your journey as safe as possible. This inevitably means slowing down to reduce the risk of sudden breaking resulting with them in your boot.

Ewock · 21/02/2017 22:02

I also slow down. Really annoys me when people tailgate it is so dangerous. Got down to 10 miles an hour once when some bloke was tailgating me. I was in no rush so was quite happy and calm. He on the other hand looked very stressed even more so when he overtook me and I smiled aned waved. If you slow down if they do then rear end you then impact will not be as severe (driving instructor told me that years ago)

Thinkingblonde · 21/02/2017 22:03

Let them look after themselves, Ignore them, don't drive slower to piss them off, drive according to the road, weather, speed limits and traffic conditions.
If some one is really hassling me I will turn off or pull over to let them pass.
A young woman driver behind me was pissed off because I let someone out of a side road, I was approaching traffic lights which were on red, it was a no brainer to me, letting her out wasn't going to impede me at all.
The woman behind me was furious, flashing her lights etc.
I ignored her, the lights changed to green, she overtook me on a slip road then started playing silly beggers, weaving, slowing down, speeding up. I took the next left as I didn't want to play her games,

EnormousTiger · 21/02/2017 22:04

It's against the law to sound your horn except to avert an accident I think under the high way code. So if they are coming so close they will crash into you yes you can sound the horn but not just because you are cross with someone.

Amrapaali · 21/02/2017 22:07

It's always a wanker car have you noticed? Today it was an Audi right up my behind. I changed lanes to allow them to pass. And then I noticed that Audi was tailgated by a BMW!!

ijustwannadance · 21/02/2017 22:09

I touch my brake a tiny bit so brake lights come on for a second.

Tailgating pisses me off. If I had to brake in an emergency they would be the ones to injure or kill my child when they ram into the back of my car.

Why do people do it on motorways too? They drive up at speed until right behind you and only then do they move into the next lane to overtake.

toolonglurking · 21/02/2017 22:09

Thinkingblonde is spot on with this - "Let them look after themselves, Ignore them, don't drive slower to piss them off, drive according to the road, weather, speed limits and traffic conditions.
If some one is really hassling me I will turn off or pull over to let them pass."

Really really really don't dick about slowing down, or trying to wind the person up or play stupid games. No one wins.

Just watch the road and drive accordingly.

Original poster

Penrithtearooms · 21/02/2017 22:11

pebble wow, I don't know what to say. Must have been very scary.

Hazard lights may be the way forward. Make a big show of slowing down and indicating so they can overtake.

Although, I will most likely not do anything at all! Just rant.

I have flashed when the car in front is tailgating the car in front of them. It really, really winds me up. I have my child in the car sometimes, with a baby on board sticker very visible. I drive an old car too (unfortunately) so I know it wouldn't be overly safe if we were in an accident.

OP posts:

chemenger · 21/02/2017 22:12

I always slow down. Makes the situation safer and has the side effect of possibly making the tailgater's head explode from annoyance. If it's out in the country and its obvious they know the road better than me and want to go faster, and especially on single track roads, I'm happy to find a way to let them pass, safer to have them in front.

Original poster

Penrithtearooms · 21/02/2017 22:13

Amrapaali Absolutely!!

OP posts:

MintChocAddict · 21/02/2017 22:13

I always put hazards on. They usually back off.

Original poster

Penrithtearooms · 21/02/2017 22:14

Ijustwannadance

My dad does this on moterways. And hes an audi driver too FFS.

OP posts:

greenworm · 21/02/2017 22:14

I remember from theory test, you're supposed to slow down in this situation not to piss them off (happy accident) but to reduce risk of accident of them ramming into you at speed. The less distance between cards, the slower you need to go. If they won't increase their distance, you are obliged to reduce your speed.

measles64 · 21/02/2017 22:16

tapping the brakes so the lights come on usually worries them. It is concerning, I will try slowing right down so that they overtake and disappear up the road.

Iloveantiques · 21/02/2017 22:18

I didn't speed up fast enough for someone today, when traffic cleared, and he overtook me on a busy residential road only to get stuck at lights 5 secs later.

I clapped.

whatsthecomingoverthehill · 21/02/2017 22:18

It's not driving slower to piss then off, though that may be a happy side benefit. It's reducing the speed to reduce the chance or severity of a collision. (Not on motorways or dual carriageway though where going slowly is dangerous in itself.)

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