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I am stunned at this wedding list

137 replies

Bananaknickers · 01/03/2007 09:54

Family member is getting married for the second time. She pinched her husband to be from his first wife( she was married too).He has his own business and she works full time. Now they have sent us a list from John Lewis if we want to buy something from there although they say we have lots already. Here's the good bit, they would like cash donations as they are building an extention on the side of their house

OP posts:

crispyduck · 01/03/2007 09:56

tell them to f* off


morningpaper · 01/03/2007 09:56

That's just terrible TERRIBLE manners

Second marriages really SHOULDN'T have wedding lists - it is very very vulgar


Whoooosh · 01/03/2007 09:56



LieselVentouse · 01/03/2007 09:56

F Off - I would tell them to shove it. By cash donations would you be able to give them Primark vouchers


hunkerdave · 01/03/2007 09:57

Oh, yuck.


elliott · 01/03/2007 09:57

And here's a contrast for how it should be done - friend's first husband died suddenly in his 30s Happily, she now has new partner and baby and they are getting married - 'no presents, but you might like to donate to a charity close to your heart'.


tissy · 01/03/2007 09:58

no you are not being unreasonable. Given the fact that she has already (presumably) had a weddding present from you the first time round, and the circumstances surrounding this wedding, I would give something very modest, and certainly not donate cash.


princesscc · 01/03/2007 09:58

Get them vouchers for something they can't use on the extension! What a bloody nerve!


elliott · 01/03/2007 09:59

I wouldn't call it vulgar, just mean, grasping and selfish.


Carmenere · 01/03/2007 10:00

So what about if dp and I get married, would it be considered vulgar for us to recieve wedding presents because he has been married before?


Cappuccino · 01/03/2007 10:01

buy em a bag of sand and cement


TinyGang · 01/03/2007 10:01

A gift wrapped brick - as a donation for the extension?


Cappuccino · 01/03/2007 10:02

carmenere absolutely not - as long as you get complete mn approval on all the items on it

no lead crystal


MrsJohnCusack · 01/03/2007 10:03

buy them some tea bags for the builders

greedy baggages


tissy · 01/03/2007 10:04

carmenere, just don't have a list


crispyduck · 01/03/2007 10:04

I am not against wedding lists....I got married second time round and did not have a list...we got money, vouchers and some lovely gifts...I would not dictate though what I expext people to spend money on...I find that attitude vulgar


Bananaknickers · 01/03/2007 10:04

Carmenere of course not

OP posts:

Bananaknickers · 01/03/2007 10:05

I love the wrap up a brick idea

OP posts:

pageturner · 01/03/2007 10:06

It's not the receiving of presents that's vulgar, it's the asking for them!


Cappuccino · 01/03/2007 10:06

I think wedding lists are generally a good thing unless you want people to buy you a load of stuff you don't want

but a nice wedding list with a range of differently priced gifts on it is different to asking people to buy you a house

I can't see why people are so against wedding lists. A lot of people want to buy a gift for the newlyweds. Why can't they have the pleasure of knowing it's something they want and they aren't going to throw it in the bin?


DimpledThighs · 01/03/2007 10:07

greedy and I agree with the vulgar. Get her a card and put a link to this thread in it.


Carmenere · 01/03/2007 10:08

PhewOh no I won't have a list, we don't need lots of stuff from John Lewis. In fact I think it would be nice to get married abroad(Europe) and folks could pay for their flights instead of presents. Quite honestly why should friends pay for middleaged friends to have posh crockery. Much better to spend the dosh on having a fab party in the sun imo.


Cappuccino · 01/03/2007 10:10

I've got some friends who are getting married after squillions of years together and they are thinking well, we've had these £5 pans for ages, and we have these fraying bedsheets that we bought in the early 1990s...

just cos you're not 25 doesn't mean you can't have nice stuff


Carmenere · 01/03/2007 10:13

Oh there is that I suppose, I mean I would like nice things but I just don't expect to get them from getting married. It will be a bonus if I do get any nice gifts. And if I do get married ..........................


Bananaknickers · 01/03/2007 10:14

I think it is the asking for cash for their extention that shocked me really.

OP posts:
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