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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to throw dp and his morning alarm out of the window.

46 replies

featherboafiend · 18/02/2017 08:15

Dp works five days a week with split days off. I work too, but less hours and not such early starts.

EVERY morning he will have his phone on snooze for at least half an hour before he gets up. This morning it was going off from 6.15, but he didn't get up until 6.45.

It is driving me insane. I'm a light sleeper, so I have now been awake from 6.15 on my day off! It's impacting to the point where I now automatically wake up really early even on his days off. On those days he can easily sleep until 11am.

I'm averaging about six hours every day and I'm knackered. Dp is apologetic, but says he doesn't hear alarm going off. He hears it well enough to snooze it thoughHmm

I've told him he can start sleeping on couch if he doesn't sort himself out. AIBU?

OP posts:
Itisnoteasybeingdifferent · 18/02/2017 08:38

Not at all..Tomorrow, turn off his alarm ... set your alarm for 6:40 .....then wake him up with a cold wet flannel at 6:45....

Original poster
featherboafiend · 18/02/2017 08:45

I like your style😄 It's an incredibly tempting suggestion.

OP posts:
LostSight · 18/02/2017 08:47

Can't you get him a Fitbit, or similar? Mine has a silent alarm function.

Petalbird · 18/02/2017 08:48

Turn his alarm off after the first snooze??

Gizlotsmum · 18/02/2017 08:48

Can't he just set his alarm for later ( he obviously doesn't need to get up so early if he can snooze it!) or move it so he has to get up to turn it off ( might be more annoying for you)

FlibbertigibbetArmadillo · 18/02/2017 08:49

Get him a vibrating alarm? You get them as bracelets or things to pop in the pillow

FlibbertigibbetArmadillo · 18/02/2017 08:49

Get him a vibrating alarm? You get them as bracelets or things to pop in the pillow

LostSight · 18/02/2017 08:50

Alternatively, if he actually doesn't need to get up till 6.45, then he should set the alarm for that time and if he 'doesn't hear it' you can just kick him till he does. He obviously is choosing to wake up that way, despite the obvious effect on you.

Sugarlightly · 18/02/2017 08:52

My DP does this and the alarms go off every 10 mins, sometimes from 5.50 until 7.00. I make him put his alarm on the dresser - that way he has to get up to turn it off and doesn't have the excuse of not hearing it.

hopsalong · 18/02/2017 08:54

That would drive me up the wall. I have a powerful dislike of snooze functions and the people who use them! Don't we all try it once and realise a) that the quality of that extra half hour of disturbed sleep is dreadful, b) that there's no worse way to start your day than already feeling late, chided to hurry up, and self-reproaching for being slow? But to inflict it on you, too, on your day off! That is torture.

If it were my DP I would say firmly that it's extremely selfish, and insists he gets out of bed whenever it goes off. Apparently we find it easier to wake up at some points in our sleep cycles than others, so maybe 6:15 is a time when he is in deep sleep? It might be worth experimenting on Monday with setting it five or ten minutes earlier, to see if he can leap more gamely out of bed then.

Raisinbrain · 18/02/2017 08:54

How selfish. I get up earlier than my DH. When my alarm goes off I turn it off straight away and creep out of the room. When DH used to get up earlier for his previous job he did the same.
Vibrating alarms are pretty good. I've used one on my Fitbit before but it always gave me such a shock.

Original poster
featherboafiend · 18/02/2017 09:02

The vibrating alarm thing is a good idea, although he can buy it himselfWink

He does actually need to get up when it goes off. The fact that he snoozes it makes him run behind. It's the fact that he claims he can't hear it going off (but manages to snooze it) that drives me mental.

If he had to get out of bed to turn it off then it would probably just go off for twenty minutes until I yelled at him.

I think it's utterly selfish too. I creep around like a mouse if I'm up before him. I'm going to stop.

OP posts:
LilacSpatula · 18/02/2017 09:03

I totally feel this. My DH set his alarm an HOUR earlier then when he actually gets up and he's then in a total flap, tearing around the house shouting about being late. I have earplugs now and don't get out of bed until he's finished flapping and buggered off. I promised I wouldn't marry someone who was grumpy in the morning, but it seems I have.

Original poster
featherboafiend · 18/02/2017 09:03

Just soooo grumpy now. I'm totally shattered on my day offAngry

OP posts:
Original poster
featherboafiend · 18/02/2017 09:06

Oh my God Lilacspatula. How do you cope?

I have earplugs too, but I'm a light sleeper so any alarm snoozing/ telling dp to get up etc just makes me wide awake.

Dp is off Wednesdays and Sundays. I'm thinking of making them my 7am hoovering daysGrin

OP posts:
MustBeThursday · 18/02/2017 09:07

DH does the snooze for half an hour thing too and it drives me mad - why can't they just set the alarm for when they want to get up and get up! Sometimes he then gets up before the last snooze has gone off so I have to find the stupid thing and turn it off while he's in the shower, by which point I'm so awake I won't doze off again. It's also annoying on the days I work as his alarm is set for 6:00, I want to be in the shower at 6:30 to have enough time to get me and DD ready without rushing but DH keeps snoozing til just before my alarm and then gets in himself.

I have no good advice, but lots of sympathy. Maybe shoving him out of bed or pulling the covers off him when the first alarm wakes you might work.

expatinscotland · 18/02/2017 09:08

He gets a vibrating alarm round his wrist or he sleeps on the couch.

neonrainbow · 18/02/2017 09:09

When he's asleep move his alarm to the other side of the room so he has to get out of bed to snooze it.

Pettywoman · 18/02/2017 09:10

I think the only sensible option is to kill these annoying bastards.

19lottie82 · 18/02/2017 09:10

Put his alarm at the other sod of the room so he has to physically get up and go over to switch it off?

19lottie82 · 18/02/2017 09:11

Side! Not sod!

TulipsInAJug · 18/02/2017 09:13

My DH does this too. It's improved since he started using his watch, which seems to be quieter. I feel your pain. I used to lie in bed and moan at him to get up for half an hour or more after his alarm had gone.

CigarsofthePharoahs · 18/02/2017 09:13

He needs one of these!

Original poster
featherboafiend · 18/02/2017 09:13

He honestly wouldn't get up if I moved the alarm. It would go off for half an hour and I'd be the one wide awake at the end.

I quite like the kill him ideaGrin

OP posts:
user1477282676 · 18/02/2017 09:14

I do this. It's because I take ages to wake up...I just do...if I set my alarm for the time I needed to get up, then I would oversleep.

I HAVE to snooze it.