To think this is a bit much at some one else's house

[Nicpem1982]

Posted on here for traffic really but if I'm bu I'm prepared to be told

When do children show a preference to learning styles?

Dds 2.5 and we had some friends over yesterday around the same age we've been friends since dcs we're 6 months old and get on well.

I went to pop the dcs lunch out and a friend agreed to keep and eye on my dd no problem.

I went back into the living room 5 mins later and friends dc had literally taken everything out and was throwing it around the room much to the 😱 Of the other who were there trying to protect their dcs from flying toys.

When I said "wow looks like you guys have had fun! Shall we choose one toy to keep out and pop the rest away?" His mom said he's a kinaesthetic learner and she won't stop him making a mess???

So my question is aibu to think this friend just being lazy or is this a thing?

Incidentally when she left after lunch she didn't clear up and the house was carnage

[BaconMaker]

TO be fair Maisypops there is a lot of evidence that some children can't sit still at school because they're far too young to be in formal education and spending far too much time doing structured activity and not enough time outside moving around.

[GallivantingWildebeest]

This is a good summary of various research into learning styles:

//Https://www.edutopia.org/article/learning-styles-real-and-useful-todd-finley

Schools are geared towards children sitting still, listening to the teachers and writing. This tends to suit older DC and gilrls, many of whom are more naturally compliant.

I think a lot of kids - esp but not just boys - would prefer and would suit better a learning environment that included outside learning, such as forest school.

Kids aren't designed to sit quietly for 7 hours a day listening. Many prefer to be more active.

[ZuzuMyLittleGingersnap]

Gallivanting,

Thanks for the heads-up about Todd Finley's article comparing research in this field...very interesting.

(Have bookmarked some of the links, too, for later perusal).

[misshelena]

What nonsense. Such a rude woman. Her child is and will continue to be a nightmare. Keep your dcs from her kids.

[ILoveDolly]

Total bs excuse for non parenting. I don't mind letting the kids run riot for a while but when they were too little to tidy up properly themselves I would have tried to clean up (if we were on a playdate) before home. It's just pure nonsense.

[MaisyPops]

BaconMaker
Absolutely agree with you. (Im secondary if that helps - so i hear parents say their 14 year old shouldnt have to sit down and write in class because thats not how he learns. Thankfully thry are far and few between)

I also think its not that surprising thay toddlers tip stuff out to explore.

Using learning styles to justify a child's behaviour is just ludicrous at any age though.

I think the OP's friend is heading towards the kind of parent that does my nut in okce their darlings get to school

[user1484226561]

gallivanting, learning styles are not real, they don't exist.

[Nicpem1982]

Maisy/bacon - thank you for your replies. I honestly don't mind stuff out and know toddlers explore I do get that.

I think it was the total disregard for my home from the mum that shocked me. She's had some interesting ideas the last year or so but as a previous post says she can parent how she likes.

Me and my friend have agreed that we will meet at parks/softplay/zoo for a bit as these environments will suit her ds better and my dd loves a good run at a play park/barn as I would like to keep her and her son as a friend as he and my dd do genuinely enjoy playing outside or in large spaces.

[SparkleMotions]

Of course children like to get toys out and make a 'mess' but I think your friend is using this learning style philosophy she has as an excuse for her child being a little destructive and she simply is too lazy to teach him to tidy up after himself. Whenever I go to a friends house, if DS who is 3 gets toys out, I will always get him to tidy up, it's about teaching your kids respect for their belongings and other people's!