Wedding Gift, Afternoon Tea and Skegness.

[HairsprayBabe]

Posting for traffic.

DP's best mate is getting married.

They asked for money in the card as they wanted to spend it on the honeymoon. We have just found out honeymoon is to be in Skegness.

We thought it would be lovely to get them a voucher for something they can do whilst there rather than just cash as it seems so impersonal. So I thought they would love something like a champagne afternoon tea DP agrees.

I cannot find anywhere in Skegness that provides this, I have spent hours googling and all I am getting is lots of results for Lincoln.

AIBU to think that there must be somewhere nice in Skegness for afternoon tea and the MN can help me find it!?

[NoMudNoLotus]

It is a voucher you need to gift them afternoon tea in Skegness ... it's LSD.

A trip on LSD is the only way you will combine those 2 things.

[BarbaraofSeville]

People are judging the OP because she is buying a gift instead of giving cash as requested, to make a point.

Because a present they don't want, that will be a chore to use as it will involve travel outside the area they are staying is somehow more personal and appropriate than what the couple asked for. It is quite normal to have a gift list for a wedding but only certain things may go on it apparently.

[Fighterofthenightman]

If you object to being asked for money (many people including me do) then don't give anything at all or don't go to the wedding.

Don't give them something else because you don't approve of what they'd spend the money on. It's so controlling and treating them like children.

[charlestonchaplin]

The OP can do what she likes with her money, Fighter. The couple, you and others on this thread don't need to like her gift. I suspect the couple will be happy enough with an afternoon tea, if not ecstatic. They are unlikely to hate it unless they have already mentally banked a certain amount of money as a gift, which would be presumptuous and yes, entitled.

[KoalaDownUnder]

The OP has said her friend likes afternoon tea.

She's not giving them a bag of dog turds, fgs. The reactions on this thread are just ridiculous.

Adults can give other adults whatever they want. What's acting like a child, is carrying on about not getting what you 'asked for'.

[Fighterofthenightman]

Really going out of the way to make a point that you don't trust them with money. So patronising.

[HappyJanuary]

Even though in the past her friend has expressed regret about blowing gift money on cigarettes? Even though her friend has previously said she wished she could go for afternoon tea?

A gift list, even one that asks only for money, is a suggestion not compulsory.

Only on mn that people tie themselves in knots to see buying a gift as an insult.

[Fighterofthenightman]

Exactly - not compulsory so OP could chose not to give money but making a point by buying something else is just rude.

And it's not as if OP is saying she'll buy a toaster or something that they keep. They'll still have 'nothing to show for it' after a cream tea same as if they were given money and spent it on fags but this way they get a horrible insight into how the giver thinks they can't be trusted with cash. And by trusted I mean can't be trusted not to spend it on something the giver approves of. I genuinely think it's a horrible thing to do.

[AntiQuitty]

So if there's no such thing as class anymore why the fuck is everyone ripping the piss out of Skegness & now Patisserie Valerie?

Yet everyone's all fucking hurt by "reverse snobbery" as they go to places way out of our price range.

[Willyoujustbequiet]

Its a lovely idea op

at the posters who think they know better

[HappyJanuary]

Fighter, the couple have previously expressed a wish for afternoon tea but not for a toaster.

I suspect they will think 'nice gift' not 'oh god what a patronising criticism of our life choices'

Op, if you're still around, you know this couple better than any of us - if you think they'll like it and not be offended then you're probably right.

[Oysterbabe]

It's not the gift instead of the requested money, it's the sentiment behind it. They wouldn't give this particular couple money. They disapprove of them and think won't spend it the way they would like.
I wouldn't want someone who was so judgmental about me at my wedding tbh.

[HappyJanuary]

The sentiment of 'this couple always spend their gift money on cigarettes but are regretful and sad afterwards so I'll get something else instead' seems quite sensible to me.

But if you try really hard you could probably read something nasty into it I suppose.

[angelgirl23]

Not in Skegness but near Spilsby at Hundleby The Elm Tree £15 per person for afternoon tea and they do gluten free for the same price. Heard its very good x