AIBU not wanting to give out party bags?

[surreynotsurrey]

Wait, you've been invited to a party, fed, watered, entertained, not had to tidy up or pay for anything AND you expect a party bag?!

[Nicpem1982]

Bath- bet it was a fab party though 😁

[mogloveseggs]

I love sainsbury birthday cakes! misses point of thread by a mile!

[BathshebaDarkstone]

It was! We hired the mezzanine area of the Sainsbury's café for free, decorated ourselves, they had café kids' meals and birthday cake, basically did what they wanted after eating (apparently 9's too old for party games ), went home with party bags and balloons. I think DD wants to do it again next year, she'll share it with DS1 whether my aunt likes it or not. She wants to.

[Nicpem1982]

Bath - that sounds lovely

[Littlecaf]

DS is 2 this week. We've been to various large 2 year old birthday parties this year (local hall/soft play/animal hire) and they were fun for the kids but nightmare for parents. Plus they are 2, they don't get it or realise yet what it all means and expensive .

We're having 6 mates over for a play date with cake.

I'm putting off proper birthday parties (and therefore party bags) for as long as possible.

Maybe til he's at school.

[BathshebaDarkstone]

It was.

[Astro55]

O thought the idea of party bags was to reciprocate the present.

I was wondering if it was a doggy bag idea to start with - taking left over food? Then morphed into extras?

[BathshebaDarkstone]

We never had party bags when I was a kid, a balloon and a slice of cake wrapped in a napkin, that was in the 70s, then when DS1 and DD1 were kids in the 90s, party bags were a thing. I don't know how they started.

[cherrypie11]

YANBU- your kid's party- your decision on whether you do party bags or not. I personally like the idea of party bags but I grew up in the early 80s when party bags meant a slice of cake wrapped in a serviette with cheap sweets and a small inexpensive toy like a novelty eraser, notebook, pencil or keyring. I have heard these days of some really expensive party bag gifts being handed out today at kids' parties. For many people they would be out of budget. Also, depending on whether the party host is on a low income even a cheap party bag might be beyond budget. That is why OP shouldn't feel pressured either way- we don't know her circumstances

[Bicnod]

Trouble is the kids love the tat. I always do party bags. To us it's tat, to them it's treasure.

[BathshebaDarkstone]

I think the bouncy balls and puzzle erasers are slightly better quality tat!

[CarefullyAirbrushedPotato]

I think it's bloody wonderful when there's no party bag. YANBU

[Nicpem1982]

Carefully - why wonderful?

[RaqsMax]

No. I absolutely side with you on this one. NEVER did them for my kids parties. Parties are expensive enough without having to add a bag of sweets and tat to costs. The kids get enough sugar and rubbish with biscuits/cake, etc. I have been at parties where I have seen children check through the loot, curl their lip and throw them in the bin on the way out. Complete waste of money.... Another bit of adopted Americana that has NOTHING to do with British traditions. They should get a bit of cake in a napkin to take home.

You go to a party to celebrate the birthday child, NOT to receive a gift yourself.

If your kids whinge because they don't get a party bag, manage their expectations. Explain that not all people give them out at parties, and that they are there to help the birthday kid celebrate and not to be grabby. Manners!

[BathshebaDarkstone]

Carefully when I read out your NN to DD 9, she said "what?"

[Crunchyside]

RaqsMax If you read a few posts pack another poster mentions party bags being a thing in the 70s and I certainly remember getting a party bag at every party I went to as a 90s child. So that's at least 50 years of party bags... How many decades does something have to be done for before you'll accept it's a tradition?

[BabychamSocialist]

I love party bags. They're handy for picking up dog shit.

Plus, party bags are the universal sign of "Right, everybody get out of my house!"

[BabychamSocialist]

My lads are older now but in the days of them going to parties with party bags, it was a slice of birthday cake (wrapped up in a serviette, obviously.), sweets of some kind and a bit of cheap tat like a bouncy ball or a whistle.

Don't know why, but they always loved them. Kids are weird like that - they endlessly surprise you with the shit they enjoy. Like when you spend hours putting together a huge climbing frame for them but they're more interested in playing with the cardboard box speaking from personal experience there.