Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Does it really do any harm??

386 replies

fruitandbarley · 08/02/2017 00:50

Holidays in school time. I'm 40, my parents took me out of school for a week once a year to go on holiday.
I've done ok for myself, don't believe it's affected me in any way.
So AIBU to ask if it's really such a big deal. ( So long as it's not a silly amount of time).
Disclaimer:- I've had wine, any spelling mistakes are due to that and not a week camping in Cornwall when I was 8).

OP posts:
Lottie4 · 08/02/2017 14:30

We took our daughter out during term time when she was at primary school - luckily had a very understanding Head at the time who fully understood parents trying to avoid the cost of holidays. Sometimes costs would have been an issue, but other years my DH was actually doing a job where it was really hard to get the school holidays due to the nature of his job.

I always touched base with teachers about what DD would be missing.

Moving on to secondary school, I think it's a lot harder as things are taught at a much higher level and there's so much to catch up on if you do miss a few days, and I wouldn't put my DD through that.

Even though DD had time off in earlier years, she's in line to get A and A*s, and I can't imagine she'd have done any better if she hadn't had term time holidays - she's done much better than her parents ever did.

Drawward · 08/02/2017 14:33

I think there are certain times when its ok and times when its not.

My Aunt took my Cousin out of school for the first two weeks of year 7. That was crazy my cousin really found it dificult when she came back as friendships etc had been formed in the weeks she was away, even her old friends from juniors had made new friends. She really struggled to fit in and ended up moving to a new school in year 8.

helterskelter99 · 08/02/2017 15:32

I don't understand how people can afford the additional childcare in the school hols
For us the logistics of covering school holidays are going to make taking a term time holiday not feasible

FV45 · 08/02/2017 16:12

helter Surely you can understand how people afford extra childcare - they pay for it or have other forms of childcare (family), as well as their holidays. They obviously have enough money to do so.

Coughandsplutter · 08/02/2017 19:22

As a teacher and parent I can see both sides. I think that if the parents and students involved are all willing to catch up and their attendance is otherwise healthy, then I don't think it's a huge deal. What annoys me is when the students come back from having 2 weeks off and then expect the teacher to provide extra sessions/revision sheets etc. This should be the student/parent's responsibility to sort out.

Gwenhwyfar · 08/02/2017 20:19

"Sorry for my ignorance, but why isn't the work given to the parents so that they can go through it with the child. They chose to take the time off so why shouldn't they make up for it.

Very few parents would actually do this. They expect the teacher to do it."

Well, if they don't do it, it doesn't get done and that's the end of the matter surely? Parents' choice, they (and their children) face up to the consequences.

triskele · 08/02/2017 20:21

I used to get taken out for holidays as the factory fortnight fell before the end of term.

I did shite at school and I can't say the holiday thing had no impact as I don't know. I think probably more that I was a real daydreamer and my folks never seemed to give a shit how I did in school!

Gwenhwyfar · 08/02/2017 20:24

"It made her question the whole idea of kids being in school at 4, 5 and 6."

Well, she should have been questioning it earlier as we all know that some countries don't start formal education until 7.

frumpet · 08/02/2017 20:29

Can I just add that I take the holidays I am able to , I do try to get as many of those in the actual holidays . I am happy to pay extra when I get them in the school holidays , I realise that the kids would be just as happy with a week in a tent 5 miles up the road . The problem I have is that even that week in a tent isn't always going to be in school holiday time . People who do not work in education do not get the same holidays , they are not entitled to the same holidays , sometimes they get very few of those holidays off , even if they have requested them over a year in advance !

DD since starting year 7 has had 0 days off sick , she is in year 9 . Through the whole of primary she had one episode of illness lasting 5 days . DS has had since starting school had 0 days off sick he is in year 2.

All I am asking is , do you think 3 days at the start of year 10 is going to be detrimental to her academic future ?

bunnylove99 · 08/02/2017 20:56

I think it's wrong and I wouldn't do it. From the individualist viewpoint, the child might not suffer and great blow to their education by missing a week , but multiple pupil absences here and there must surely disrupt the functioning of the school. I also think education is too important to want to risk giving my kids any impression it's something they can just opt out of when it suits. I know my views are old fashioned and many disagree (including my DH!).

MsGameandWatch · 08/02/2017 21:00

It's not "wrong" it's just different to how you would choose to do things.

NarkyMcDinkyChops · 08/02/2017 21:09

multiple pupil absences here and there must surely disrupt the functioning of the school

Not in the slightest. Why would it?

JenniferYellowHat1980 · 08/02/2017 21:35

Don't expect the teacher to set work (if it was all worksheets, why would teacher be needed at all?) and if they miss an assessment, don't be surprised of your DC appear not to have made progress.

Italiangreyhound · 08/02/2017 22:10

I wonder if people (parents or teachers) think that children who are physically present during a specific lesson will therefore 'learn' whatever is being taught that day?

user1484226561 · 08/02/2017 22:23

I wonder if people (parents or teachers) think that children who are physically present during a specific lesson will therefore 'learn' whatever is being taught that day?

that's up to them, isn't it. But they certainly don't if they are absent

thatdearoctopus · 08/02/2017 22:32

We don't set or catch up missed work, or reschedule missed parent consultation appointments. I write in a child's exercise book that they have missed, say, long multiplication due to holiday.

hungryhippo90 · 08/02/2017 22:44

I do think that it can have an affect. I do however think that there must be a way to minimise the impact it will have on our children's education.
The fine doesn't lessen the impact on our kids, I will happily pay the fine of I believe 120 per parent, per child, when having a holiday during term time has allowed me to save 50% of the total holiday cost.

I would be even happier, if I knew that the money I was paying meant that DD wouldn't suffer the effects of missing out on a few weeks of school.., the fines are enough to cover a few hours private tuition.

I also feel that it's unfair that these fines were brought in not for the families who go on holiday, and have children who regularly come to school, ready to learn. But for those parents who don't drag themselves out of bed, so their children can attend school. I read statistics, I'm sure they said that this demographic seem to have children who do not attend school for an average of 50% of the year, all down to not being bothered. Yet it seems that the ones on holiday for a few days per year, but manage decent grades etc are penalised!

Sorry for being so long winded.

They do go on about how harmful it is for their education, if that's correct, I completely understand. But I would be happier given guidelines of what DD needed to learn in her absence, and or be given a fine for DD being behind because It's been proven that she's fallen behind because of the holiday, not because the guidelines say after five days to issue a fine.

Trifleorbust · 08/02/2017 22:45

Italiangreyhound: Oh good God, no. But at least they have the chance to do so. Poor attendance is the best way to guarantee poor results.

Trifleorbust · 08/02/2017 22:47

NarkyMcDinkyChops: Of course it does.

NarkyMcDinkyChops · 08/02/2017 22:49

It really really doesn't. Like I said, other countries have no issue. Why would it be an issue? It makes no difference to anyone else if my kid is in school or not.

Trifleorbust · 08/02/2017 22:55

NarkyMcDinkyChops: We aren't in other countries. There are many reasons why it might be different here. I work in a school so I can tell you for a fact that I find it disruptive.

NarkyMcDinkyChops · 08/02/2017 23:03

You and I are in different countries. And just because you find it disruptive doesn't mean it objectively is.
How does a kid being off for a week disrupt you in any way? And do you complain that kids being off sick is disruptive?

Italiangreyhound · 09/02/2017 01:10

user1484226561

"that's up to them, isn't it." Do you think children choose not to understand things?

Italiangreyhound · 09/02/2017 01:15

Trifleorbust "Italiangreyhound: Oh good God, no. But at least they have the chance to do so. Poor attendance is the best way to guarantee poor results."

Is it? I guess for me here is ample evidence that kids can be physically present and actually not learn, maybe because of all things i mentioned up thread like dyslexia, SEN, bullying etc.

It seems odd that some things, perhaps key things would only be taught once. If a child was ill, or away, for any reason, they miss it. And all those who are present and don't really get it, they never get a chance to learn it again? Where as if key things were repeated then there is more chance for kids to re-learn,recycle learning etc. And f someone missed it first time around then they can pick bits up.

Our school wrote recently to tell us that they know there are a lot of bugs doing around and children have been off ill. This was swiftly followed up with a bit of a mini lecture on the evils of missing school.

Honestly!

NarkyMcDinkyChops · 09/02/2017 01:40

No wonder UK schools are failing so badly if you teach multiplication on a Wednesday in May and never mention it again, thereby ensuring that anyone having a sneaky week in Tuscany will never be able to find the product of two numbers!